They Think They Can Look Down on Me Just becasue I refuse to get Married
By Arya
@yoalldudes (35037)
Philippines
December 26, 2020 7:09pm CST
Ok I messed up getting myself pregnant by a 19 year old student when I was 23 just starting out with no money. So they think the only solution is to get married. For me the solution is to raise my daughter the best way I can.They made sure I dont get to do this by firing me from job, saying all possible bad things about me behind my back, spreading malice and rumor.
After all, they are the good ones, the church goers.
But through time I realized I made the right decision. So now I am ready to reap the fruits of something I stood up for.
I am building myself up. And life is getting better. I just have to be strong and believe in myself, and find people who believe in me too.
9 people like this
7 responses
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
27 Dec 20
Thank you so much, my friend. I am faltering, and I needed that push to keep me on the path of self-empowerment.
1 person likes this
@rakski (122997)
• Philippines
27 Dec 20
@yoalldudes marriage can do a lot of damage. The old folks and some conservative people still are against non-marriage if pregnant but they should been more open minded now
1 person likes this
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
1 Jan 21
@rakski I think I made this post to let it out my chest the injustice that was done to me. Now it is new year and I am open to moving forward and healing.
1 person likes this
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
27 Dec 20
Thank you so much for your support and understanding.
2 people like this
@marguicha (223010)
• Chile
27 Dec 20
You are right. I hope you can do what you want
3 people like this
@marguicha (223010)
• Chile
27 Dec 20
@yoalldudes I guess it is only worth it if you find a special person for you.
2 people like this
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
1 Jan 21
@marguicha Us women have a way of keeping tabs on everything, especially when it comes to our husbands/partners. So, I'm still figuring out but in the process Im losing time. So I resolved just to live my life now and not overthink things.
2 people like this
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
27 Dec 20
Sometimes when we love someone we are so giving that we lose ourselves. Thank you and I hope I find that self I would be happy to live with.
3 people like this
@Raine38 (12250)
• United States
27 Dec 20
Marriage is not always the answer. You owe yourself, and your child, a better life that you chose and worked hard for, and not the kind of life that others impose upon you. I was once in that position, albeit I have no child. People are waiting for me to have a boyfriend. Then when I have one, they kept asking when I will get married. When I got married, they keep asking when we will have a kid. It's none of their business, what if we can't have one? What if we don't want to have one? You know, miserable people will always have something negative to say about you no matter what. So kudos to you for living the life that you want, and standing up for what you believe in.
3 people like this
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
27 Dec 20
Thank you for your kind supportive words. I feel less alone in my struggles. Also, thank you for sharing your own personal experience. I hope you are in a better situation now, free from the judgmental and prying people. I am still here but I have found an inner strength I didnt knew before.
2 people like this
@Raine38 (12250)
• United States
27 Dec 20
@yoalldudes I would like to think that I am free from those who thought the worse of me. But even if they are "gone" from my life, there will always be others to take their place. 
A better situation will never be the absence of those negative people and other nay sayers, but the presence of peace that can only come from within.
A better situation will never be the absence of those negative people and other nay sayers, but the presence of peace that can only come from within.2 people like this
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
27 Dec 20
That is right. That inner voice that knows even when no one is watching.
1 person likes this
@Cheyee (8344)
• Pakanbaru, Indonesia
28 Dec 20
I never in your position, so I don't really know what to say except fight for yourself (and your daughter). The better day is always waiting for the one who works hard.
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
1 Jan 21
Yes, it is a good feeling when we stand up for ourselves. Happy New Year!!!
1 person likes this
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
6 Jan 21
@Cheyee Happy New Year to you too. I hope you have a great year.
1 person likes this
@Cheyee (8344)
• Pakanbaru, Indonesia
5 Jan 21
@yoalldudes indeed. Happy belated new year. I hope you have a better year. I am sorry, I haven't been around for few days
@yoalldudes (35037)
• Philippines
6 Jan 21
For sure, I am yet to see better days. Didnt regret making the decision.
1 person likes this
