It's Hard Monday, Ya Beatniks! (MyLot Exclusive #1229)

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Happy Strawberry Day! Today started as a normal, average, and comfortingly boring typical Strawberry Day here in the Neon Fun Jungle. This means it, very predictably, devolved rather quickly into insufferable annoyance. I was sitting here in my office, minding my own business, when Anaerobic Threshold, my Head Personal Trainer and Chief Executive Vice President In Charge Of Gymnasium Affairs, came in. Ana said, "Sir, I have spent the many long grueling weeks since I've been here trying to show you that female bodies have more to offer than the upper rear regions of their legs and I'm tired of banging my head against that wall. So, in the spirit of 'If you can't beat'em, join'em," I am declaring today Leg Day." For the record, I know everything the female body has to offer. They didn't make me a Gynecologist because I look good wearing a stethoscope, you know! And I pay attention to every single one of those offerings. It's just that some of them get a little more attention because they are more important than the others. Anyway, Ana told me about an exercise called Goblet Squats and started to demonstrate it and I settled in to watch---That's how I workout. She exercises and I watch. I would describe the way Ana does Goblet Squats but you'll have to go to my MyLot AfterDark Channel for all those details. In the meantime, I'll just forge ahead with the parts of the story I can tell here. Heavily truncated to conform to unfair space and length limitations. On or about several minutes later, my friend Cheka Colossus-Cobbler, the Regierungs Und Reichskriminaldirektor of the local Girls In Black Leather (GIBaLs) Office...GIBaLs was started, as just another Side Hustle, by my friend Ilsa, AKA She Wolf Of The SS, in 1937 and it's still going strong today. Under new management since 1945...Rudely barged in. I visited Ilsa yesterday. She lives in Argentina now. If you want to know more about that trip, you'll have to yet again go to my AfterDark Channel. Cheka said that my Dimensial Customization Studio is violating the laws of energy, momentum, and angular momentum conservation. In case, you don't have one of your own, a Dimensional Customization Studio is much like a Recording Studio. Only, instead of Music, you lay down basic tracks of reality, culled from many different Dimensions, and then mix, filter, equalize and arrange them to your liking. What you end up with can be compared to a HoloDeck experience with fewer limitations. The Fuzz, AKA Cheka, says it's legal within certain parameters (She says I go beyond them) but unnecessary because you can find exactly what you want by searching the infinite number of Dimensions without any artificial manipulation. And if that isn't good enough, and you have to create your own, at least follow the rules! I say that's fine. If you have time for it. Which you may have, if you're not 29 like me. Cheka, as usual, couldn't handle the simple truth of that position. She threatened to write me a ticket. Then she threatened to arrest me and confiscate all my equipment. If you want to see who came out on top of this argument, see my MyLotAfterDark Channel. Spoiler Alert: It has a twist ending, much like an O. Henry novel. To avoid ruining the surprise, I'll just say that the person who ends up on top isn't always the winner. But I am still insufferably annoyed. To restore a bare modicum of reasonableness to this Hard Strawberry Day Monday, I'm going to have another Strawberry Melon Fizz. I recommend you do the same. You'll find the recipe in the Link below. You'll notice that it doesn't say anything about adding Champagne to the concoction but that's just because the Champagne goes in without saying. ************** Lifestyle National Strawberry Day 2023: 5 must-try beverage recipes Written by Sneha Das Feb 27, 2023, 03:46 am 2 min read