Harassment Experiences
By Amber
@AmbiePam (94073)
United States
August 12, 2023 11:34am CST
I remember the first time I was sexually harassed I was ten years old, and selling candy cars for my school. I walked into an auto repair shop with another student (we were always in pairs), and asked the guy if he wanted to buy a candy bar. He said no, but he’d like to (use your imagination here), and then asked for my phone number. My classmate and I turned around and walked out. I didn’t look ten, but I also didn’t look like I was a full grown adult (I was occasionally mistaken for the teacher).
When I was 25, a guy at work asked me out, but I was in a relationship, so I said told him that, and turned him down. He proceeded to try to make my work life as difficult as possible. Funny thing is, I didn’t even get angry. He had seemed like a nice, funny guy, but the second things don’t go his way that’s how he handles it? I wasn’t the only one who noticed it, and kept getting asked about it. I just laughed it off (seeing a grown man act like a child IS amusing). Until one day, a guy in a position above him noticed, and called him out. Told him he needed to get over it, and act like an adult.
Another girl I worked with at a different place started getting vile emails from a guy, and I remember thinking how pathetic the guy was, and how perverted. He got upset, and his solution was sexual harassment? What was wrong in his head? He got a warning. A warning! I guess the men in charge didn’t have the guts to take a stand.
It was another mylotter who brought this discussion to mind, but I’m not sure if she would want me to list her name since she was sexually harassed after all.
Of course, there are the inevitable pats on the rear it seems women get, with guys just telling you to loosen up. We all have our stories of these situations, and a lot are worse than my examples. I could share more, but who wants to depress other women?
Let’s be real though; women can sexually harass people too. They just don’t do it nearly as much as men do. Also, a big shout out to the men who are respectful, and aren’t sick in the head, for not thinking the world revolves around you and your feelings. You are noticed, appreciated, and a good example for the next generation.
24 people like this
15 responses
@Juliaacv (51506)
• Canada
12 Aug 23
The guy from the shop was seriously sick, he sounds like he was a pedafile.
I am so glad that you were in pairs, that was safe.
There does seem to be so much heard about women being sexually harassed but so very little about men being harassed, yet it happens. It is the very same as physical abuse, when a woman swats at a man, that might seem innocent to her, but if he did that to her, it would be physical assault.
I have been blessed that I have not had any real harassment.
When I was a teenager, 2 of my older brother's friends made a comment each-once, and only once. I shut them down pretty quickly and they knew better than to mess with me, after all, I was a Daddy's girl, and they all had a bit of fear of him.
4 people like this
@Juliaacv (51506)
• Canada
12 Aug 23
@AmbiePam I thought that I took care of his one friend, but that guy came over every single day after his mother passed. He used to come right after supper, and would often pull up a chair and join us in a slice of pie as it was usually dessert time. I remember my Dad making a comment that he was there every single day for months on end, and he didn't think it was to see my brother, and coincidentally every time he'd come over I would excuse myself and go to my bedroom and read.
3 people like this
@crossbones27 (49721)
• Mojave, California
12 Aug 23
I would never sexually harass anyone but one time a lady misled me and she even admitted as much. It was nothing to do with work thank universe but gave me a teaching experience to read people better.
She had a boyfriend but you could see my mistake, She drove 70 miles to pick me up to take me to San Diego when I was on leave in Marines. Who does that if they have a boyfriend? Maybe I am not just use to nice people. I guess was not. She said stop and I stopped its as simple as that. Not sure why people have a problem with that no matter the situation. Its called be respectful and treat people how you want to be treated.
4 people like this
@rebelann (113001)
• El Paso, Texas
12 Aug 23
I only remember one incident back in HS but it wasn't nearly as bad as what you've written about. Whats worse is in the 60s most all men would check to see if the girl or woman was 'teasing' the boys or men by wearing inappropriate clothes in their standards or talking inappropriately, it was usually assumed the girl or woman was 'asking' for it.
The other problem in the 60s was that many girls who'd been abused by their dads never knew to mention it and they were the ones who didn't really know any better and well now adays we know why but back then even my mom was unaware of that kind of problem
2 people like this
@FourWalls (69135)
• United States
12 Aug 23
I was in the Navy, and the stories I could tell. The stories any woman in the military could tell. I guess I just learned to develop a thick skin for it.
The funny (in a good way) thing now…the guys I play golf with call me “Jugs.” Yes, it’s a double entendre, but the reason is that I bring water jugs to the tournaments to help us stay hydrated. Now, if some guy walked in off the street and said that to me, he’d find two dozen putters wrapped around his neck and a couple more up his rectum. Huge difference when it’s a “joke” from people you know and love as family.
Truth be told, no person should have to experience that.
4 people like this
@FourWalls (69135)
• United States
12 Aug 23
@AmbiePam — just what makes the news is the “worst” in terms of actions (like assaults). It was so commonplace that, maybe positively, I just learned to ignore it. You know, part of the “Navy life” like the profanity (“he cusses like a sailor”).
3 people like this
@Tampa_girl7 (50561)
• United States
12 Aug 23
The man in the auto repair shop was a child predator. What a sicko
2 people like this
@DaddyEvil (137737)
• United States
12 Aug 23
Pretty developed early and I was always having to back other guys off. Once, while we were at the lake, one dude kept staring at her until I stepped between them and told the guy she was 12 years old. The guy made a comment that pissed me off further and I offered to kick his butt for him to teach him manners. He called the police and thought he'd won something until I explained why I threatened him. Then the police told him to get his stuff and get away from us if he couldn't keep his perverted thoughts to himself.
I don't understand why some guys are like that. I never was and wouldn't ever treat a woman like that.
3 people like this
@DaddyEvil (137737)
• United States
13 Aug 23
@AmbiePam 
No problem at all.
When Pretty started dating, I insisted on meeting the guy taking her out. I wouldn't let her go if the dude just pulled up in front of our house and honked the horn. I wanted him to know there would be consequences if he behaved badly towards her. (I taught Pretty how to throw a knife and she always carried one on her. She still does.) When the guy came in to meet me, I made a point to ask if she had a knife on her. She always did and pulled it out to show me. I told each guy the same thing... I taught her how to handle a knife. If anything happened she didn't want to happen, she had my permission to remove any offending body parts. One dude laughed. I asked Pretty if the blade was sharp. She grabbed the guy's arm and slid the blade down it. His eyes got huge at the hair that fell from his arm. Pretty always came home on time with a very respectful young man at the end of a date.
No problem at all.
When Pretty started dating, I insisted on meeting the guy taking her out. I wouldn't let her go if the dude just pulled up in front of our house and honked the horn. I wanted him to know there would be consequences if he behaved badly towards her. (I taught Pretty how to throw a knife and she always carried one on her. She still does.) When the guy came in to meet me, I made a point to ask if she had a knife on her. She always did and pulled it out to show me. I told each guy the same thing... I taught her how to handle a knife. If anything happened she didn't want to happen, she had my permission to remove any offending body parts. One dude laughed. I asked Pretty if the blade was sharp. She grabbed the guy's arm and slid the blade down it. His eyes got huge at the hair that fell from his arm. Pretty always came home on time with a very respectful young man at the end of a date.2 people like this
@snowy22315 (182381)
• United States
13 Aug 23
I guess I am fortuanate. I haven't had it happened all that much to me, I was sexually assaulted a couple of times though...but at the time I didn't even recognize it as that...because they didn't "hurt' Me as such, and I guess we were on a date, but that doesn't mean he had permission to do that, one time different jerks it was in a public place...and I should have gotten them kicked out of there. I guess it was embarrassing, but they were the ones who should have been embarrassed!
I guess it was embarrassing, but they were the ones who should have been embarrassed!2 people like this
@allknowing (137938)
• India
13 Aug 23
No such stories to tell in my school or college days but later I did have to chase away a guy who we both my husband and I knew. Knowing I was alone in the house he visits me.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (472121)
• Switzerland
13 Aug 23
It is a sad word I know. I have been harassed several times. The first time I was 12, it happened in the apartment building where I lived with my family. I went down in the cellar to pick up a few things, when I came out the old father of the concierge grabbed me and tried to kiss me. I was horrified and disgusted and I run upstairs telling my Mom what happened.
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (80884)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
12 Aug 23
My best day was when I met my soul mate and stayed with him for what I thought was a lifetime and no longer had guys come on to me, Now that my husband has passed on, and have gotten used to being on my own in six years and I can tell remembering some of the guys I just wanted to get away from and how people are in this crazy world I would just rather be on my own with my two cats,
2 people like this
@TheHorse (220408)
• Walnut Creek, California
13 Aug 23
I've hung out with a lot of guys in my life, both through sports and music. Most are cool and respectful of women. But I've met a few exceptions over the years. I don't know what their actual behaviors were like, but the way they spoke about women let me know they were not people I'd want to hang around with.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83581)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
13 Aug 23
I also experienced being sexually harassed. I do not like to remember it. It was so horrible. I was walking near home after alighting from the car when the guy suddenly squeezed my vaggy I shouted at him and stoned him. He was hit but never looked back. I called the police but he was at large 
I shouted at him and stoned him. He was hit but never looked back. I called the police but he was at large 1 person likes this
I agree.
@Treborika (17853)
• Mombasa, Kenya
28 Aug 23
I am very glad that I am respectful to all the people of all the calibre
1 person likes this
@RebeccasFarm (90523)
• Arvada, Colorado
13 Aug 23
Yes those who enjoy harassing others, rarely change. It is a compulsion with them. A defect.
1 person likes this
