Have you fantasized that you're Messiah?

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These days,i had a heavy punch in life,My dad's four ribs broke,it spent 4000 RMB(ABout 25% of our general income).Then on September,we're gonna pluck the fruit.But because of dad's disease,we definitely have to endure an economic winter.After all,my mom and i aren't good at plucking the fruit. I started to communicate with the freedom fighters outside,they're the one that maybe will be interested in my works.Anyway,my works are basically Chinese literature,Chinese Freedom Fighters are the main readers i need to serve. From 2006 to 2024,it has been 18 years,still no one cares or helps me in the way of pursuing the dream of being a poet.Why would i not give up this illusion? Because i always hint myself that i'm extraordinary,i will be the Chinese John Keats in 21 Century.After i die,people will know the value of my art. Surely,the most important thing is that i hypnotized myself that i'm the Chosen One,the Messiah.In China,there's an old oracle that saying there will be a Saint Purple(Ziwei Shengren) falling down on this world and save the people.He was a poor peasant,god locked his soul with 7 curses,but eventually he will be the Modern Confucius,the whole China will bow down to his theory. You maybe think i'm crazy,but in this desperate life,disillusioned fate,only craziness and delusion can drive me to move on,to fight against the tragic reality.Surely,i know i won't be that Messiah,he was born in the year of Rabbit,but i was born in the year of Chicken.But who knows,maybe i'm that chosen one. Will you fantasized that you're Messiah?How do you think of this pathetic delusion?