I have a question

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I don't expect an answer, but I'm going to throw it out there. I do something. I remember doing it, but only if someone sort of breaks it. I don't know how old I was, but I think it must have been a Sunday morning because the family would all sit down for breakfast. I remember seeing a bright spot in the blinds and staring at it. My father broke me out of it, but I don't know how now, it was over 60 years ago. Was I thinking of anything? No, I was just staring at the spot. Since then, I have continued to do it. Connie would see me and ask what I was thinking of. That's just it, I wasn't thinking of anything. I find this is the good way to deal with pain over the years, but... all I can do is sit and stare. So, it doesn't help me with anything more than that. But I don't understand why I do it. When I stop doing it, it seems to take a little bit to get my brain fully engaged again. I guess I should ask a doctor, but it isn't like I do it when I'm doing something like driving or walking. Honestly, I like it when it happens, and I remember it happening, because it seems like I'm giving my brain a break/rest. Maybe it happens more when I'm low on sleep? I don't know, I can't say I remember anything like that. So, anyone else have something like this? Remember, the first time I remember doing it I was still in my single digits of age (I know this because it was at the house we lived in until I was 9) so it isn't endangering my life.