Got Called a Loser Today
By lilacskies
@lilacskies (1279)
United States
February 11, 2025 4:41pm CST
I'm back home after "hanging out" with my mean sister-in-law. I say "hanging out" because it was just her basically bossing me around and doing things for her as usual. Whatever she said, I obeyed like a good pet. She told me to drink coffee and I hate coffee, but I drank it anyway. It was black coffee. No sugar and cream. Just black and it tasted awful.
She showed me everything she bought on her recent trip to Miami, Florida. I complimented on everything even though I didn't think a single purchase was worth the money. She splurged on name brand things that are mass produced, but she acted like they were the rarest things in the world. It was difficult to stomach.
By the end of our "hanging out," I was completely exhausted and couldn't wait to just come back home, crawl into bed, and recuperate. However, I witnessed something bewildering.
She bought a fancy ring from her Miami trip and it came with a beautiful blue cloth type jewelry bag plus box. Both the bag and box were in pristine condition. Nothing wrong with them at all. She just slipped on the ring to show it off to me and tossed the bag and box in the garbage can right in front of me. I quickly intervened by asking if I could have the bag and box to use myself. They were brand new. Why not, right?
She sneered and called me a loser. She asked me if my new hobby is picking up trash now. I didn't react. I kept my poker face. She sighed and waved her hand dismissively like she was giving me permission, but didn't verbally do so like I wasn't worth talking to.
I took the bag and box out of the garbage can. There wasn't anything else in the garbage can so the items weren't stained with anything. She laughed meanly as I took them out and laughed even harder when I thanked her.
She asked me if I wanted her loose change as well. She didn't even wait for my answer/reaction. She just snatched my right hand and shoved a bunch of coins into my palm. I counted the money when I came home. She gave me 93 cents.
I was called a loser for saving some brand new things from ending up in the landfill. I am deeply hurt, but I will bear the pain. This isn't the first time, but since it was a new incident, I thought I would share on here now that I have a place to vent/share about my life.
7 people like this
6 responses
@MarieCoyle (40513)
•
8h
The thing that bothers the narcissist the most is when they get no attention. Then they lash out even more with the insults and such. You mentioned the grandmother with ''friends'' in one of your posts. Does she have a spare room? Can't you just go there? Staying where you are is solving nothing, your parents letting your ex in like he lives there, him bugging you, your sister in law the way she is....I would be finding a way out no matter what it took. I might even buy a tent! (not realistic, but I would be tempted!) You've put up with this for 5 years? Oh, I would do everything I can to get out of there....I hope you can come up with a solution, there is no point living in hell if you don't have to.
2 people like this
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@MarieCoyle (40513)
•
7h
@lilacskies
I hope you can move out very soon I couldn't live like that. Heck, tell that witchy sister in law anything that works...tell her you are contagious, that you have laryngitis, make something up if you have to, but stay far away from her. Ugh.
2 people like this
@lilacskies (1279)
• United States
6h
@MarieCoyle I am at my wit's end. The frustration is up to my throat. I will try my best. I know. Ugh. I attract toxic people in my life because I have bad luck.
2 people like this
@lilacskies (1279)
• United States
7h
Thank you. I tried to keep her at arm's length, but since I've been living with my parents and she lives next door, she has easy access to me. I can't reject her offers because I can't say no to her, Excuses doesn't work with her. My health condition doesn't work. Nothing works. I am trying to save up to move out, but it's not easy. I am still trying my best though. As for living with my grandma, that's simply not feasible because she has lovers even at her age of 87 and I don't want to impede on her personal space. I also don't want to witness her love life by living under the same roof as her. I'm trying to move out. I am trying to get a full-time job this month. I applied last month and was about to give up completely, but I did hear back last Monday for an interview in three weeks. I'm hoping I get hired so I can move out despite my chronic pain.
1 person likes this
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@kaylachan (74652)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
12h
Well, you need to learn to say no to her, and stick up for yourself. She called you a looser, because she knows you're a doormat and don't want to be there.
2 people like this
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@kaylachan (74652)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
10h
@lilacskies I know it will be hard, but you need to make her respect you, by showing you have a spine. You can do it.
2 people like this
@lilacskies (1279)
• United States
10h
@kaylachan It would be a disaster to stand against a narcissist. I will cut her off for good when I am financially independent and move out. I have an interview for a full-time job in a few weeks. I hope I get the job, but in the meantime, I'm trying to keep afloat with freelance work and saving up as much as possible.
2 people like this
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@snowy22315 (184863)
• United States
14h
If she's mean and you don't like her, why are you hanging out with her?
2 people like this
@lilacskies (1279)
• United States
14h
She is a narcissist who will not take no for an answer. If she wants to hang out, I obey her because I don't want my life to be destroyed. You need to meet a narcissist to know what they are like, but I don't want you to ever meet one. Your life will never be peaceful again.
2 people like this
@snowy22315 (184863)
• United States
14h
@lilacskies I know some.No one is forcing you to be around her.
2 people like this
@lilacskies (1279)
• United States
13h
@snowy22315 I have no choice due to my circumstances sadly. It's a very long story.
2 people like this
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@lilacskies (1279)
• United States
6h
I had no choice because I had to tread carefully around a vindictive narcissist. One wrong move and my life is destroyed. Narcissits are some of the most dangerous people on this planet. They can easily destroy an innocent person's life just because that person said no. I wanted to survive so I said yes to everything she had to say. Yes, I reuse anything useful. No need to be wasteful when there is an opportunity to save. I can use these things in the future when I need to.
1 person likes this
@lilacskies (1279)
• United States
5h
@jstory07 Thank you. This is all for my survival. I have only one life after all.
@1creekgirl (42296)
• United States
8h
I don't know your situation, but why in the world do you even have anything to do with her? Respect yourself.
2 people like this
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@1creekgirl (42296)
• United States
8h
@lilacskies I hope you can get in a better place soon.
2 people like this
@lilacskies (1279)
• United States
8h
I know. Unfortunately, I can't stand against a narcissist. She will destroy my life with one wrong move. I only have one goal and that is to move out and cut the narcissists out of my life.
2 people like this
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@LooeyVille (38)
• United States
4h
Either stand up to her or shrug her off. I save bags and boxes too. We're not losers.
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