It's Friday, But I'm Not Really Cheering

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We made it to Friday but it's not a day I really feel like cheering. We had our station election and meeting last night. It did not go the way just about everyone thought. Everyone thought I had the election and there was no way I wouldn't get it. Well my station proved them wrong and sadly lived up to my expectations. I did not get voted...at all. How do you get ahead when no one gives you a chance? That also spoils everything I was working to this year for next year. I know that was mouthful but I had plans. Plans that will be A. harder to accomplish or B. impossible. I told them last night, I have two options running in my head right now and I won't make an emotional decision. One, I quit. I hand in my gear and just focus on EMS and Rescue Squad. Or option two, I skip some levels and go for lieutenant. It'll take for me about a year to a year and a half to get the classes for it then all the time practicing pumping a few engines and the tanker. I still don't feel like I can make a decision right now. If I do, I'll probably regret whatever it is. The only thing my husband said was don't turn in my gear because we have a crappy station. I'm kind of lost this morning. I'm going to print out the Lieutenant application and see what I'm missing and maybe go from there. I'll post a regular post in a few, I just had to get that out there because it's weighing on me a lot right now. Like elephant weight on my chest. I didn't think it would hurt this bad but man! It really does hurt. What's even worse is it hurts this bad and I expected the rejection.