Have you heard the one about the....

@chunkers (1050)
United States
December 8, 2006 9:55pm CST
I am a salesman and I travel on the road quite often. One night I was driving back to Minneapolis, Minnesota from Fargo, North Dakota, which is about 180 miles. I was in a hurry and didn't want to stop (not even to use the bathroom). But, as circumstances would have it, I had to go very, very bad!! So, instead of stopping I was just cruising along at about 110 miles per hour! Suddenly I looked in my rearview mirror and saw, to my ABSOLUTE HORROR...Flashing Lights! Scared, I eased the speed back to 75 and waited for the flashing lights to pull me over. Instead, the flashing lights passed me! It was an ambulance! Relieved, I fell in behind the ambulance and waited for the next exit. About 20 miles later an exit appeared with a gas station. The ambulance took this exit and I followed. When we got to the end of the ramp, I noticed there was a black box strapped to the back of the ambulance. Not thinking anything of this, I prepared to make a right towards the gas station. Suddenly, as the ambulance turned left, the cords holding the black box to the ambulance broke and the box fell off. Unfortuantely, the driver never noticed and kept going. Curious, I stopped to pick up the box but had to use the restroom so badly that I didn't have time to use the bathroom. So, I drove to the station, relieved myself, then got back in the car. Excitedly I opened the box to see what it held. To my amazement, inside the box was A SEVERED, BIG, BLOODY TOE!!! That's one of the weirdest experiences I've ever had. Has anybody else had any similar experiences? Careful, there might be more to the story than meets the eyes.
4 people like this
10 responses
@TerryZ (22076)
• United States
13 Dec 06
OK Ive read it. And?????????????
@chunkers (1050)
• United States
13 Dec 06
Most people are curious about what I did with the big, bloody toe.
3 people like this
@chunkers (1050)
• United States
13 Dec 06
Ok, I give up! Someone is supposed to ask me what I did with the toe. Then I'm supposed to say: "I called a toe truck"! Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha
3 people like this
@rebelann (112875)
• El Paso, Texas
8 Jan 20
The ending stinks but it was pretty good up to there @chunkers
@Polly1 (12645)
• United States
23 Dec 06
Yes, I once found a body all chopped up and stuffed in garbadge bags..... About 2 weeks later the head was found..... It was floating down the river signing..... I ain't got no body.....
3 people like this
@rebelann (112875)
• El Paso, Texas
8 Jan 20
So how the heck did it sign? Ohhhhh, I think you ment sing. So funny how that spell check goofs up words
• India
24 Dec 06
Every night after dinner, Merle took off for the local watering hole. He would spend the whole evening there and always arrive home, quite inebriated, around midnight each night. He usually had trouble getting his key to fit the keyhole and couldn't get the door open. And every time this happened, his wife would go to the door and let him in. Then she would proceed to yell and scream at him, for his constant nights out and always coming home in a drunken state. But Merle just continued his nightly routine. One day, the wife was talking to a friend about her husband's behavior and was particularly distraught by it all. The friend listened and said, "Why don't you treat him a little differently when he comes home? Instead of berating him, why don't you give him some loving words and welcome him home with a kiss? Then he might change his ways." The wife thought that this might be a good idea. That night, Merle took off again after dinner. And at about midnight, he arrived home in his usual condition. His wife heard him at the door. She quickly opened it and let Merle in. Instead of berating him as she had always done, this time she took his arm and led him into the living room. She sat Merle down in an easy chair, put his feet up on the ottoman and took his shoes off. Then she went behind him and started to cuddle him a little. After a little while, she said to Merle, "It's pretty late, dear. I think we had better go upstairs to bed now, don't you think?" At that, in his inebriated state he replied, "I guess we might as well. I'll get in trouble when I get home anyway!"
2 people like this
@rebelann (112875)
• El Paso, Texas
8 Jan 20
That's not really funny at all.
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
15 Dec 06
Ok I have read it to now so come on I am waiting lol
2 people like this
@rebelann (112875)
• El Paso, Texas
8 Jan 20
The ending wasn't worth waiting for.
• Sri Lanka
24 Dec 06
Thank God it is only a joke. Othewise someone with a missing toe would have tip-toed to your place and towed you away in a police car. Anyway you would have had a spare toe to help next time you put your foot down on the accelerator. You can also keep your fingers crossed next time you chase an ambulance.
@mfrancq (1806)
• United States
15 Dec 06
You called a toe truck? You made me read this whole long thing for that? hehe Very cute, definately not what I expected though. A toe truck? I'm shaking my head probally with a complete dumbfounded look on my face.
2 people like this
• United States
18 Dec 06
You really had me going. lol I thought ewwww...gross...and then you reveal it to be a joke! A "toe truck". lmao Your a scoundral.
3 people like this
@chunkers (1050)
• United States
15 Dec 06
I'm glad you liked it. Keep your eyes peeled for more!
3 people like this
@mfrancq (1806)
• United States
24 Dec 06
He is a nut shadow...you gotta watch this one!
2 people like this
@wvchell78 (564)
• United States
26 Dec 06
I wanted to read the punchline before responding. I wasn't sure what to expect. I have to admit it is funny!
1 person likes this
@sharon613 (2321)
• United States
23 Jan 07
family photo - this was taken a while back
This sounds like you have an interesting but hectic life such as myself. I just sent a picture of my two middle kids.
• Janesville, Wisconsin
5 Jan 07
Oh My, I am so glad this was a joke, as I was like what is a toe doing in a black box? I mean if they were going to do something with it. It should be in a cooler of Ice right? Or in one of those red tubs that say biohazard! on it lol... I would have called the police from the gas station, and told them what happened, and hoped they'd rush deliver the toe to the doctor if that was real lol. Glad the worst I ever found was grandpa's toenail 6 years after he passed lol. - DNatureofDTrain
@bterrier (308)
• United States
23 Dec 06
way to go chunkers! that was funny, It made me laugh.
2 people like this