Providing the non custodial parent with the child's needs
By gypsiesgirl
@gypsiesgirl (2)
June 15, 2006 1:58pm CST
Do you have to provide the non custodial parent with everything that the children need for his visitation? As in clothes, pullups, diapers, soap, etc. Or do they need to learn responsibility and provide for their children when it is their time with them? I've been sending everything, except this past weekend I didn't send any pullups and he told me that I could have least sent two pullups. Any advice?
2 people like this
5 responses
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
8 Oct 06
I would not send diapers, soap, food, things like that because the non-custodial parent should keep that on hand for the visits. I think sending clothes and their fave toys is not a big deal.
1 person likes this
@ctodd75 (31)
• United States
9 Oct 06
Question: does he keep the items at his house after his visitation is up? I had that problem when my child was younger- he would keep everything I would send with him (including her toys, blankets, etc.) and I would have to go and get her new ones. I was on a tight income at the time and didnt really have the money to buy stuff. Also, it didnt help that he didnt ever pay child support.
1 person likes this
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
9 Oct 06
He sends everything back. I send clothes and whatever my son wants to bring and then his dad sends it home with him. His dad tries to pay child support but maybe pays half of what he is suppose to every month. We didn't split up until my son was 4 so we were past the food and diapers stage. If he was younger, I would make sure that his dad did have diapers and formula. I know it wouldn't be my responsiblity but I would rather have to dish out a few diapers than have him go without.
1 person likes this
@ctodd75 (31)
• United States
8 Oct 06
No, you dont have to provide anything. The only problem with not providing clothing, toys, etc. is that your child will be the one going without (if he doesnt have anything there for the child). Its a pretty rough call. If you send two pullups, that would probably be good- but dont send clothes, etc. Yes,he should be a grown man and provide for his child. Keep documenting EVERYTHING- you dont know when you will need it, or how.
@dragonstar13 (1465)
• United States
1 Jan 07
If you don't send what your child needs, who will suffer? The dad or your child? I would suggest you try to talk calmly to dad at a time other than pick up or drop off and try to reach an agreement who provides what when child is with dad.
If he won't cooperate or won't provide, I would suggest you make sure your child has what he/she needs but document, document, document. If you find you are buying two complete sets of clothes, toys, diapers, food, etc. maybe you can ask the judge to increase the child support.
At least you will know your child is not going without.
@red158 (333)
• Canada
7 Jan 07
As far as I'm concern the father should have this stuff at his place. That being said when my ex was unemployed I supplied groceries ect. so he was able to see the kids and I knew they had food to eat.
As long as he is trying to be a dad, don't sweat the small stuff.
Plus if you had always done it up to now how was he to know, did you give him any warning.
@squallming (1775)
• Malaysia
27 Mar 13
The children belong to you two. So, it is the responsibility of both to take care of the children. So if you left something, the other partner should have some stock of the basic necessary items such as diapers and pullups. The fact that the partner had none means that the person is not mindful enough. Anyway, perhaps you can make things clear to your ex partner so that responsibility is taken seriously. 
