My best friend found out her husband is CHEATING on her with another MAN!

@mkup30 (494)
United States
December 14, 2006 2:13pm CST
She actually caught him when she came home early from work last week. He is a writer and works from home for the most part. Guess he was doing a lot more than just working at home ughh. She wants to go to a therapist/marriage counselor for this. I don't think that will help! What do you think she should she do?
1 person likes this
5 responses
ruby1459
@ruby1459 (2600)
• United States
14 Dec 06
It happened to me before with my ex husband and yes,once if the person cheats on her/his partner then most likely second and third will come. Some marriage counselor has helped many couples from getting divorce or so,but it didn't help us.I thought it would worth to attend to a marriage counselor but my ex said if I was a good woman then he didn't need to cheat on me and also said it's waisted to use a money to seek for a counselor. I have got divorced soon after but I hope she will find the best way to solve this issue....:(
mkup30
@mkup30 (494)
• United States
14 Dec 06
wow, im so sorry to hear that...nobody deserves this type of thing happening to them. I just dont think a marriage counselor will convince him to be attracted to women.
mkup30
@mkup30 (494)
• United States
19 Dec 06
yes me too
MikeBorg
@MikeBorg (85)
• Indonesia
20 Dec 06
Like father like son - Like father like son
Hope you'll be strength to faced your problem with your 'un-thankfull' husband... GBU
mansha
@mansha (6298)
• India
14 Dec 06
Once a cheater always a cheater,if she has no kids and is financially sound then she should just pack her things and leave.Otherwise may be try a counsellor for few months and see if her husband changes her ways-give him just one and only one chance and then leave .I feel leopard can never change his spots so better leave him and save herself from again and again humilation.
mkup30
@mkup30 (494)
• United States
14 Dec 06
I agree...she doesnt have kids, so it shouldnt be too hard. but for some reason she wants to salvage this marriage and try to save it. I dunno how she can unless she becomes a man..obviously she is not his type (or gender)!
mkup30
@mkup30 (494)
• United States
14 Dec 06
another thing..before this happened she said she had been notcing for a long time that he was not responding in bed and not showing interest at all. That is not normal for a married couple of less than a year is it?!
euniceeleanor
@euniceeleanor (5966)
• Singapore
20 Dec 06
wow! that's bad! i dont think i could bring myself to forgive my man if i'm her...well, it will depends on whether she wants to give him a 2nd chance...if yes, then it's advisable to seek the help of a therapist.
mkup30
@mkup30 (494)
• United States
20 Dec 06
a second chance it doesnt seem like that possible...since he likes men..that is another issue aside from forgiving him or not
crosschk
@crosschk (818)
• United States
14 Dec 06
if my wife did cheat on me, I would hope it was with another woman, Then I know it would be out of my hands and there is really nothing I could do. I think she should dump him. Gay or streight cheating is still a breach of the vows!
mkup30
@mkup30 (494)
• United States
14 Dec 06
you're right all around. first off, it is out of her hands, but she not at all realizes this! i dont know if it is my place to tell her to give up on her marriage though. Also he cheated, it is a breach of vows and he did it many times not just once, he admitted this to her!
mfrancq
@mfrancq (1806)
• United States
14 Dec 06
If I found my husband cheating on me, it would be over and that is that. I couldn't imagine how I would feel, let alone if it was with another man. My advice for your friend would be for her to leave her husband and then get counseling for herself. That's a tough situation, she may be blaming herself for it. Just don't let her get wrapped up in the whole "I'll never cheat on you again" thing. That is so much crap ( am I allowed to say that? I hope so.) Once they cheat they will always cheat, especially since you let them get away with it once. Good luck and best wishes to your friend.
mkup30
@mkup30 (494)
• United States
15 Dec 06
thanks so much, I totally agree with you. and that is really a great suggestion that I could bring up to her - to get counseling for herself. she should spend the money on conseling for herself and leave him for good!