Laughter is the best medicine

Two drunks, Santa and Banta, enter a hotel late at night. They approach the clerk, and Santa says, "Could you pleash give ush a bed with two rooms?" "You mean a room with two beds?" asks the clerk. "Whatever, whatever you shay." So they get a key and somehow manage to stumble upstairs to their room. After fumbling for ten minutes, they even manage to get their door open. As they stumble inside, the door closes behind them and they are in total darkness. They go forward slowly, and both fall on the bed closest to the door. "Ahh," says Santa, "Now we can get some sleep at last." As they try to rearrange themselves, they suddenly realize that they are not alone in their bed. "Hey! There's somebody in my bed!" says Banta. "There's somebody in my bed too!" says Santa. "Let's get rid of them. We paid for this room and we're going to sleep in the beds!" says Banta. They start a tremendous struggle. They heave and push until eventually Santa throws Banta on the floor. "ALL RIGHT!!" Santa shouts,21 jan. "I've thrown mine off the bed." "You're lucky," says Banta, "I got thrown off and I'm too tired to fight any more." "Well, never mind," says Santa,2003 "Why don't you just come and share my bed. Let's get some sleep round here."

This is not laughing matter but of attempted theft,reminds me of the bible quote,As you sow so shall you reap( with Interest)

Little Johnny had a cussing problem and his father was getting tired of it. He decided to ask his shrink what to do. The shrink said, "Since Christmas is coming up, you should ask Johnny what he wants Santa to bring him. If he cusses while he tells you his wish list, leave a pile of dog poop in place of the gifts he requests." Two days before Christmas, Johnny's father asked him what he wanted for Christmas. "I want a damn teddy-bear laying right beside me when I wake-up. When I go downstairs I want to see a damn train going around the damn tree. And when I go outside I want to see a damn bike leaning up against the damn garage." Christmas morning, Little Johnny woke up and rolled over into a pile of dog poop. Confused, he walked down stairs and saw another pile under the tree. Scratching his head, he walked outside and saw a huge pile of dog poop by the garage. When Johnny walked back inside with a curious look on his face, his dad smiled and asked, "What did Santa bring you this year?"Johnny replied,"I think I got a dog but I can't find the son-of-a-wench!"

Little Johnny was failing his classes so his mom decided to put him in a Catholic school. About a month later when Little Johnny's mom recieved his report card he got all A's and B's. Astonished, Little Johnny's mom asked him "How did you get all these good grades?"Little Johnny replied "Well, when I saw the man hanging from the cross I knew they meant business!"