Do you expect to much of your kids?

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Most parents make wee-meant efforts to set high goals to motivate and stimulate their children's learning and good behavior. But many doesn't understand their own child's limitations or strengths. In fact, many potentialities and limitations - in intelligence, temperament and mental health - are laid down prior to birth. We may want our son or daughter to do better than we did at the same age, but if it's not in the cards, or genes, no amount of coaching or coaxing will move them much beyond their natural gifts. In fact, the pressure may have the opposite effect.Trouble arises when we ignore the signs that a child isn't ready to live up to your expectations. Lets face it, too many parents are living vicariously through their children. But if a child is not really good at what his parents are pushing him to do, that can do irreparable damage. This is the antithesis of developing self-esteem. When a child doesn't meet expectations, the parent may feel resentment, which shows up as anger or frustration. Children may see their parent's disappointment as rejection, and these feelings can lead to hostility, emotional withdrawal, a sense of incompetenceand conduct problems or delinquency.