My step-mom has given all my dads things away....

losing your father is a terrible thing, and i understand your feelings but you really have to move on and one of the first ways of doing this is to get rid of a persons things. It should not be seen as a sign of disrespect or a sign of redundent love, but just a sign of dealing with grief

I am sorry for your loss. Both of you might be grieving in different ways, but if you do not get her behavior, ask her or at least express how you feel. Only she can answer your questions and help you understand.

I am so terribly sorry for the loss of your father! No words can describe the pain you must be going through, my father passed away about 5 years ago and it is a very difficult time. My dearest deepest sympathy to you and your family! She is probably having a very difficult time dealing with your fathers passing and this could be a way of dealing with it. Maybe she is passing things of his on to others so they too can have a piece of him to hold on to. But remember he's in your heart, in your memories and not in the objects he's left behind.

Everybody deals different with that thing some keep the Stuff for years and others find it easier if they don't see any Stuff there so yes I guess it is her way of dealing with it

Hun, I know it isn't easy for you to understand but, having lost a husband myself I do understand. Sometimes the constant reminder of the lost one is almost too much to bare. Having your fathers things there is the one thing that would always be that constant reminder of the pain and loss she feels. It's just her way of moving on and away from the pain she feels in her heart. Please don't think badly of her for doing things this way.

grief is different for everyone but if it really bothers you then you need to talk with her about it in the same way you did here.

People deal with grief differently, it may be her way to deal with grief, but at least she should have invited you over to go through all of your father's things and take special keepsakes for yourself -- before she even thought of giving his possessions away.

We each grieve differently. This may be what she needs to do. My mother was just the opposite and kept my dad's clothers hanging in the closet for twenty years. I have a terrible time going to the cemetery to visit my husband's grave. His sister goes frequently, bringing flowers, etc. and I know she thinks I don't honor his memory because I am not a cemetery person. But my grief is sincere.

I am sorry for your loss. It is kind of weird that she doesn't want to keep his belongings. Maybe that's her way of dealing with it. The least she could've done though is consult with you and your siblings, if you have any, to see if anyone wanted anything.

maybe that is her way of dealing with it because if she keeps the stuff it will always be a constant reminder and maybe seeing his stuff upset her to much that is why she got rid of it.i do not think she got rid of it because she ants to forget him its probably to painful for her.

It may be her way of dealing with it. Perhaps if his things weren't around to remind her of him then it wouldn't be so hard on her. I don't see why she just doesn't put it all in the attic or something.

I think she is trying to get ready to move on I know its only been a little over a month ago but Im sure she is keeping somethings.

I am sorry for your loss but i am affraid you could see this comming. These situations happen fricuently. I am really sorry you did not now about thiese situations.

Stephanie I am so sorry about your father. My own dad passed away in May of 2005. My mother started giving away my dad's clothing first to family members. She kept saying "there is a lot of good wear left in these" and such. I think is was her way of dealing with her pain and loss - giving and lending a helping hand to others. Now I don't know if any of the clothing will ever be worn again, but it did my mom's heart good to give what she could away. No matter how much she gives away over the years she will always have her memories of him. Hang in there...

best thing u can do is talk to her.i.e ask her:)

im sorry to hear about your father give it time. your father will be with you in your heart. and for your step mom she miss him and its hard for her i think she giveing thing away so she wount have to see them. some people do diffent things when people die. i hope she gave family things too. good luck i wish you the best

That is probably her way of dealing with it. She probably isn't real sure how to deal ith seeing his things all the time. So maybe that is why she is giving them away.

Are u the same person tat posted about the "no-memorial thing" How did u do with that anyways? I do belive that she might be giving away the things coz she has no idea on how to deal with this. I would llike u hang on to everything, but in the end noone benefits from that., Maybe she´s doing what your dad would want her to do. spread his things around and make others happy...

by the way,condolence for your father, about your stepmother,I think it was her way of grieving giving the things that remind about your father. She loves your Father so much that she could not bear the pain every time she remembers your father.Everywhere she would go inside the house there is something that reminds her about your father.

I am convinced it is her way of dealing with her loss. She wants to remove all the items that remind her of him but when she gets done she will still remember and she will need someone to grieve with. Just be patient with her. She has lost a mate and probably has few people she can talk with.