what constitutes a lie?
By LadyElektra
@LadyElektra (1078)
Canada
December 17, 2006 4:21pm CST
I was wondering if making ambiguous statements that are made to deceive count as a lie.
Example:
You have a girlfriend and you are going out to have coffee with a female friend. Assume your girlfriend doesn;t like you going out for coffee with females. When your girlfriend asks where you are going you could say: "I am going with a friend" or "I am going to get a cup of coffee with a friend". Is that a lie?
Now assuming you don't count it as a lie:
If she then answers "Have fun with him" (or some other sentence where she clearly shows that she misinterpreted your sentence to refer to a male friend). Would you be obligated to correct her? Does silence count as a lie there?
There are many more possible examples of truths that are said ambiguously to deceive. Are they lies?
2 people like this
59 responses
@ecpunzalan (401)
• Philippines
18 Dec 06
if you intended not to say the whole thing to cover something up may your purpose be not to hurt your friend is still a lie...
1 person likes this
@missrita04 (29)
• United States
18 Dec 06
In my opinion, it is a lie, because leading people on will always be considered as a lie. If you are going to tell the truth, tell the WHOLE truth, otherwise, it will still be a lie no matter what.
@Tanushree4444 (1275)
• India
18 Dec 06
the fear of getting a scolding,cursed or beaten helps in creating lies.
@acosjo (1903)
• Canada
18 Dec 06
That is a great question. I will say, if someone is led to believe something, and a person remains silent, doesn;t correct it, know that the other is thinking incorrectly, then yes, it is a lie.
Then the question is, is a lie something that has to be said directly?
@JustSimplyLissa (547)
• United States
18 Dec 06
if details are left off i wouldn't consider it a lie per se.. but if she made a statement back to you like that, then yes you should tell her. It's only right.
You might want to examine your relationship with her, if she's so jealous about you having coffee with ANY friend. It's not cheating for goodness sake, unless you've given her a reason to think as such. Then maybe it all should be considered.
@barbarella (354)
•
18 Dec 06
Most definitely in my book. Lying is not about the phrasing that you use, it is about your intention. When people said the earth was flat, they weren't lying because they believed it to be true. It is all about whether you intend to deceive and in the example you give above, there is an intention to deceive so it is lying.
@nehakalley4 (1918)
• United States
18 Dec 06
for any relationshipto go on wellthe most important thing is trust, if your boyfriend or girlfriend have trust on you then uj should always tell the truth and correct it if he/shehas misinterpreted u,and if she/he dosent havetrust on you then its useless to drag that relationship any further
@micheller (1365)
• United States
18 Dec 06
yes i think that this does count as a lie. if you well know that she doesn't like you to have coffee with a girl and you tell her you are going with a friend and leave out that the friend is a girl then you are lieng, because you know that she will think your friend is a boy if she knows that you know she doesn't like you with a girl. and for the second example that is definately a LIE, because she said him and you did not correct her by saying, no it's a girl that i'm going with, that's leading her to believe something that is not true, A LIE!
@Centregeek (500)
• United States
18 Dec 06
A lie is any disception or distortion of the truth for your own benefit. It doesn't have to be a big lie, a small little bending of the truth can end up hurting someone. Think in terms of why the truth is being bended and who benefits from that. If caught in a lie, no matter how small, it can seriously harm relationships and destroy trust. We all tell lies from time to time (big or small), but bottom line is if you mislead someone in any way you are lying.
@shiboleth (270)
• Canada
18 Dec 06
I would call that lying. Not telling somebody the truth is not moral, especially if you are withholding information because you know they would be upset. If the coffee wtih a friend is innocent, you have no need to lie. If you lie about something like that the other person will think you are hiding something.
@bryelee (451)
• United States
18 Dec 06
Yes its a lie, becasue you know that it isn't just a friend and this would be upsetting to the girl friend. Plus you aren't being honest about whom you are going out with. I don't know that you would be obligated to correct her. Why do some people feel the need to lie? Either don't go out with this female friend or break up with the girlfriend. It's not hard, why do people want to complicate everything?
@Whatmileyourep (3)
• United States
18 Dec 06
Lies are lies its pretty cut and dry. It just takes some common sense and you can pretty much figgure out in each individual cirmcumstance. Silence isnt tecnically a lie but if someone misinterprets something you say, and then make it obvious, silence can be classified as dishonesty.
@limcyjain (3516)
• India
18 Dec 06
i think when done intentionally it would be a lie. Only something not done with a view to deceive the other person can be considered as not telling a lie
@vipul20044 (5793)
• India
18 Dec 06
Lie is a deliberate misrepresentation of, or hiding of, the truth.
The key concept here is "deliberate" - a lie is one persons deliberate, knowing attempt to mislead another
@ESKARENA1 (18261)
•
18 Dec 06
to me what constitutes a lie is a statement designed to decieve, even if it is being ambigouse
@Trace86 (5030)
• United States
18 Dec 06
I agree with the others. If you re-phrase the truth in a way to conceal the real truth, it is still a lie because you intended to deceive. How would you feel if you were the one who was told an ambiguous truth and then found out the real truth? It is better to tell the real truth and take the consequences. If your significant other can't handle the real truth, then you shouldn't be with him or her.
