Give me your best joke! (clean)

Bhola sees lot of guys running on the highway. Asks a bystander as to why are the guys doing what they are doing. The bystander explains that a Marathon race is going on Bhola : What do they get from that? Bystander : The winner will get a prize Bhola : Then why are the others running?!

One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. "Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man. "We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "Oh, come along with me then," instructed the lawyer. "But, sir, I have a wife and two children!" "Bring them along!" replied the lawyer. He turned to the other man and said, "Come with us." "But sir, I have a wife and six children!" the second man answered. "Bring them as well!" answered the lawyer as he headed for his limo. They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you." The lawyer replied, "No problem, the grass at my home is almost a foot tall."

Once it so happened in a flight that, James Bond was sitting besides a Telugu guy Both were traveling to US. Telugu Guy: Hello May I know your name please? James Bond: I am Bond... James Bond....... and you? Telugu Guy: I am Sai... Venkata Sai... Siva Venkata Sai ... Laxminarayana Siva Venkata Sai... Srinivasula Laxminarayana Siva Venkata Sai... Rajasekhara Srinivasula Laxminarayana Siva Venkata Sai... Sitaramanjaneyula Rajasekhara Srinivasula Laxminarayana Siva Venkata Sai... Bulusupalli Sitaramanjaneyula Rajasekhara Srinivasula Laxminarayana Siva Venkata Sai... Bond faints!!!!

What do you call a brown,hairy,small,glasses,and silent.????Have you guessed????Its a little brown monkey with glasses on.Merry Christmas and a happy New year.heeheeeheeeheee

yo momma underwear is so crusty whenever she farts, it makes a whistle yo momma is so fat, she fell in love and broke it. yo momma is so tall, she did a handstand and kicked jesus in the chin

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer see's a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies, two in the front seat and three in the back, wide eyed and white as ghosts. The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?" "Ma'am," the officer replies, "You weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers." "Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly twenty-two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error. "But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep this whole time," the officer asks. "Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Route 142."

take this one dear In the zoo, it always seems that the fences of the kangaroo's cage are not high enough to keep him in. He always escapes from his cage and wreaks havoc outside. The management board convenes and allocates funds to increase the height by one meter. Two meters. Five meters. Still the kangaroo is still able to go outside wreaking havoc. Finally the management decides to increase the height by 10 meters once and for all. This is overheard by the lion who rushes to the kangaroo saying "Pal, they will add 10 whole meters to those damn walls and how are you gonna jump that high?" A little puzzled the kangaroo says: "Jump? they have been leaving the door open".