DAD see's his 3 LEGITIMATE children not so often as he should

No, it's not fair, they should expect their dad to be available for them whilst accepting that he has another family too. Obviously your kids don't need him all the time but there are some things he should be there for and some time he should be willing if not desperate to spend with them. Unfortunately lotsof dads seem to think that it's unfair to their new family if they stay in contact with the previous one. I think you just have to listen to how your kids feel and if possible gently tell theor dad without causing a war, maybe he could make more effort if he realised how much they care for him. My son is 7, his dad left when I was 6 months pregnant and didn't come see him until he was 2 and he wanted back in our lives through having nowhere else to go, as this was not a good idea he gave my son a card and £5 for his third birthday (the only thing he has ever given), stayed 2 minutes if that and hasn't been in touch for another 4 years.

I know where you are coming from here, my husband has had the exact same problem when he was young his mum and dad split up, his dad re-married and gained to step children, his dad doted on him and his brother previous to this, and all of a sudden his dad did not want to know he also paid for his step children to go to university and also employs them both in his multi million pound business, my husband has not seen his dad now for years and to top it of he lives round the corner!! Why this happens is beyond me, but I know how much my husband hurts about this situation, we have recently got married and have a beautiful daughter which he knows about, he did not come to the wedding and he has not seen his grand-daughter. My husband sees his step dad all the time and loves and adores him like he was his dad and he is my daughters grandad. My advice is this man needs a good talking to, if he does not listen personally he is a waste of time and the children will be better off without him, my husband is living proof!! Anyone man can be a father But it takes a real man to be a dad!!!

It isn't fair and my heart goes out to the kids. Their father should accept his responsibility and try to be a part of their lives. He should take an active role in the lives of all of his children. However, it sounds as if he has completely moved on and would choose to ignore his marriage and his first 3 children. I know that it is painful to accept and that every child wants a relationship with his / her parent no matter how badly they are treated by their parents, but most likely these children are never going to have the kind of loving father they would want. I suggest they focus on what they have in other relationships with other family members and allow them to talk about their feelings about their father openly. Also, reassure them that his leaving is not their fault.

it's not fair enough for the kids.although he has a new family he shouldn't neglet his responsiblities..i did have such experiences...well, we couldn't solve it no matter how hard we try if "daddy doesn't want to change"...the problem's started by him n only him cld solve it... we will waste our time if he insists to be like that.the problem is "HIM"!! i flt so sad in that time..but i did think i must be the best. always saying like this to me myself "wut will be hapened then if i run away from home? if i runaway from home how i'm going to school? if i'm not going to school how i'm going to take exam? if i'm not taking exam how i'm going to boarding school? wut will be hapened to my future????" after that i continued my studied in a boarding school when i was in secondary..after that i was in matric for A-level full sponsorship and now on i'm in university and doing my business as well!!! :) i used to console myself although in a deep sad....i know that no one will respect me if i do fail....i proms. to my ownelf i won't treat my kids like my parent did.:)

I am sorry that you have to go through this. My best advice would be to not just wait around for his next move. Just make sure you stay close with your other two siblings and know that they are there for you. Unfortunately I do not think your father is going to come around. A lot of men are like that when they get a "new" family. I don't think they realize how much it hurts people. Again I am sorry that you have to go through this and I wish you the best of luck.

i totally agrr with you

hey i know it has been a hard time for you well there isnt much you can do rather than to wait and watch! You can only be a spectator and observe what your dad is going to do the next and then react!

how old are the kids? Adults now? Still in high school? My dad did the same thing. I grew up okay. As for support go after him for it well unless the kids are 18 or older. You can't make a Man or Woman love and want to see their children so there is no quick fix and way to make him. He will either want to or not. Sad thing is many want to later in life but the time has passed and the kids will not have time for him...He needs to wake up.

perhaps just tell his other family about the lack of fatherly love the 3 legitimate children is experiencing? well, it would not be easy as it seems, but anyway, good luck.. :)

i wonder y those 3kids still bother to communicate w/ their father since he's irresponsible anyway.

Children of the legally wedded wife have rights from the father, they should be supported. But in the instant case, it seems that the children are of the age of majority already? Their step sister supposed to be younger will soon graduate from college. If the legitimate children have attained the age of majority, I think they could no longer demand support from their father. It should have been done when they are minors. If still minor, then take the legal action.

of course it's not fair. The father should at least take his responsabilities, you just don't have 3 children by accident!!

no it's not good , children should see their parents often

first you shouldnt judge your dad. your mother may have caused him to not want to deal with her therefore hurting you. im not saying that was right cause i would never let my ex-wife stop me from seeiong my daughter and trust me she has, but some men would rather eliminate the stress. have you expressed your concerns to your dad maybe that should be the first step in helping you through your rough time.

thats really unfair for them not to see thier father even their father has new family, arent they have the visitation and rights to their father? life is unfair but you can still fight for your children right, did you ever consult lawyer regarding this matter? does the father do his obligation atleast in terms of support?

Having said I don't have the right to impose my views on others, I am now going to try and describe them anyway. The fact is that I do think I know better than most people what is appropriate for young people in the theatre. (I should, since I am a trained professional in the field of child drama, and have studied and researched the question both formally and informally over the course of countless productions and classes.) I said earlier that, for the sake of argument, I was assuming that individual parents have the right to decide what is best for their children. (I put it that way because over the years I have learned that in practice some parents don't have the slightest idea what is best for their children--and I'm not just talking about the ones who chain them up in the basement.) But even with that assumption, it is my right, and in fact my responsibility as a children's artist, to try to educate adults about children's dramatic art and the possibilities it offers for really enriching children's lives, if we can get past our own narrow definitions of appropriateness. In my view, good, "appropriate" Theatre for Young Audiences has the following characteristics: It is about children and childhood, or about concerns that are of legitimate concern to young people. It deals with its subject matter honestly, and it is respectful both of its material and of its audience. It should challenge and stimulate them both intellectually and emotionally. Theatre for young children should be fast moving and visually stimulating. The same guidelines hold true for film and television

Are you talking about my family? This is somewhat my life story. My dad left us, married a lady who has three children. My dad has not called us for our birthday for more then half my life, he has not seen my my five year old son, and has seen my 15 year old about five times. I have cried so many times for him. Wonder why he does not love me or want to talk to me. I've made it this far without him and I can continue my life without him. I have hurt too much over him. Good luck to those kid's, they'll need it.

this is not good..i think dad is ignoring his responsibilities about the children

The dad shouldn't act that way. it is irresponsible just knowing how to make babies but then neglecting them just like that. In this situation the three kids must realize that they have rights to further education and they can use the service of a lawyer to make sure the father pays for their education.

sorry to hear that