InLaws...are they all this annoying?

Wow, if I had a sister in-law like that I would get caller ID and not answer the phone. Sounds like she's got some problems of her own and she doesn't know how to deal so she takes it out on the two of you. I would tell her that she needs to stop calling everyday and bringing out her fustrations out on the two of you and if she can't do that then don't call at all. I never here from my in-laws. My husband calls them maybe once a year to fill them in on how things are going. If she can't respect how you feel then she has no respect for herself. Tell like it is and if she gets mad oh well.

You might want to have your husband, her brother, have a sister brother talk. Something is making her angry and mad, and it may have nothing to do with you. She is just venting in a negative way. Or, if you are close enough, invite her over for coffee, and have a heart to heart talk, but don't put her on the defense. Good luck dear.

Why on earth you allow her to get involved with your family affairs? Tell her to mind her own business and leave you and your husband peaceful. But this is something that your husband has to do, since she is his sister.

I face this same problem too. You really get stuch=k with these know all type realtives so often. I know exactly what you are facing, I face same thing too. Recently I have decided to not to pick up the phone at all, whoever it may be. I let my kid pick up or my hubby do so. I have stopped talking to that person, if she thinks I am rude to her let her think. Otherwise also she has never thought I was any good, so what difference it makes if one more adjective gets added with all the others i have been given. I want my peace of mind and I am not in mood to bother with her feelings presently. Try doing the same and wear rhino skin over you so that words do not reach your heart. I have litreally given up on being nice to these kind of people. They do not deserve it.

What I would do in your case is to tell her in a reasonable tone of voice that if she starts yelling I am hanging up the phone. I would also tell her that certain subjects - such as my parenting choices - are none of her business, and if she continues to talk about them I will hang up the phone. Then I would do it. I would not yell. I would not argue with her. I would never be anything but peaceful and reasonable. But I WOULD hang up the phone.

Sounds like you guys need to set some boundries for the sister. Have hubby talk to ehr and tell ehr stp stop, if she doesn't maybe bring their mom into it to shut her up. I hope your mom in law isn't like this. Good luck! I am lucky, my huuby has 2 older brothers and I think they were happy to ahve a sis, I am a lot younger than them so they don't bother with us.

i've been there, and i'm glad i'm out of that situation. i just wonder why they are called 'inlaws' when 'outlaws' would be more appropriate :P

Hi, your sister in law does sound like a real pain, and I read your response to your first reply, about how you went off at her. Under the circumstances that sounds normal. If you are still communicating, tell her nicely but firmly, that you really don't think you have to communicate everyday, and that you feel she is interfering in your life. Also tell her that you think she being unreasonable. Let her know if she does not stop interfering and making your life miserable, you will not be friends with her. Best of luck.

remember one rule, your husband choose to marry you because he felt a connection with you, but he never did choose to have her as a sister. Be understanding, she must not be that bad. There must be something you could do to make her stop calling and annoy you. €Only you know the answer and even if you tell us everything no body else but you will know the situation better than you. So the answer to this problem is with you somewhere all need to do is look a little bit harder and you will find it. Good luck.

I understand how you are feeling. It can be very frustrating when family memebers behave this way..its not esy to deal with them or confront them. You could try talking to your hubby (if he feels the same way about this) and maybe he can tell your sister in law indirectly that she is interfering more than necessary. And if the interfernce isn't bothering you, atleast tell her that she needn't get so worked up and yell at you everytime. I know its isn't as easy as it sounds, but you could give it a shot. Merry Christmas!:)

Bottom line your sister in law doesn't like you. For what ever reason, i don't know another than you stole her brother. And you didn't met his family expectations. You mite have to give it some time and show that you really is the girl for him. Or you can ask her " do you have a problem with me".

I actually only have 1 inlaw at the moment since I'm divorced now. But I wouldn't tolerate this. Tell her that her way of doing things are not your way of doing things. That you can agree to disagree but that if shes going to tall to berate you for the way your doing things then your just going to stop answering the phone. I'm sorry but you can't live your live to suit her but at the same time you might not be able to get through to her that she's being unreasonable. Just not answering the phone for a while might be the best option you have. Sorry you're going through this and good luck with it.

Welcome to the club mfrancq! I too suffer the same fate with my sister in law. She wants to control our life. How we spend our money, when to have kids, what to buy with our bonuses, etc. I think she should feel a sense of shame doing that. Since she is the richest among her brothers and sisters, she feels a need for control of everything. She scolds my wife as if she doesn't have a husband! She tells my wife to do this and that and it involves money. She wants us to give support to her brother who have 5 kids. At least for their school allowances! My goodness! How far can you get? My bro in law is working as well as his wife, I mean that is their responsibility right!? Why does she need to do that? There are a lot of things which she wants us to do, but I warned my wife not to listen to her. She doesn't control us! She provokes us to bitterness and I can't stand her. I just want to avoid her. I have forgiven her, but she provokes me to anger constantly. I don't want any confrontation. However, I devised a way, less contact, less friction. That means, I have to avoid her most of the time. I have a sick mother in law and father in law and both of them are living in her house. Out of respect to them, I have to visit them every weekend. But, it is rather difficult and awkward when she is there. They have a family gathering this christmas in her house, and I don't think I would join in though. As long as my mother in law and father in law are still living, I have to endure this.

in laws will always be there coz ur the one who married IN to ur spouse's family...

It's always harder to deal with the in-laws compared to your own family members. I'd be just as honest with her... about the things she wants to discuss with you. Even if its hard or may hurt her feelings. You'll find that the calls will slow down because she won't expect you to have a comeback. Sometimes you just need to take a stand for what is right and if it means she won't talk to you for awhile...hey you've succeeded in a sense.

some inlaw are very nice i had some of the beat

Ah, I feel so lucky that my in laws are a thousand miles away. That way when we do see them they are less likely to silly mundane things to complain about like many in laws do. Ok, but on to your question? You need to be firm. Even if it ends up not coming off as nice, you still need to be firm. Tell them you are your husband are adults, you have your own home and life, and you would like to leave your lives as adults and not kids. Tell them you love them but will not tolerate their petty complaints anymore. Sure they will get offended, but at least you may get some respect from them. Just try to be as pleasant as possible without forgetting that you have to be a bit firm. Good luck!

if you live with them, yes they can be annoying.

Yes, I do agree. All in-laws are this way. However my wife's side of the family can call and talk about nothing all day. However, my wife isn't any better. I refuse to answer the phone whenever they call. I just hand the wife the phone and say it's your mom or it's your sister. They bug the hell out of me. I have done no wrong to them, but yet I am the most evil person in the world. In my case, my in laws are my outlaws. Good Luck I think this comes with every marriage. However my wife has it made because my family may call once every 3 months and come to see us maybe once every 6 months. She's got it made. Once again... GOOD LUCK:)

I understand exactly where you are coming from.I have a sister in law like that and the worst thing is she lives with my mother in law who is like that.After they called telling us about $136 we owed them me and my husband finally had enough.Well, I had had enough a long time before that but it seemed my husband was oblivious.It was him who did the confrentation finally and got them off our backs.He told them that he loved them both but they didn't need to call EVERYDAY and keep him on the phone.He is the one that finally stood up to them and I am glad to report that it has gotten better.And I hate to admit it but your husband has the upper foot in this,not you.It is his sister.You can say something to her that would be the very same thing your husband would say but sound better from him.I hate that it is that way but it just seems that it is.So talk to your husband. And if he doesn't than you say something.She may be mad,but the harrasment may stop. I really hope I helped at least a little.