Killing me softly!! with his WORDS!

Point out to him is that his jealousy is getting in the way of your feelings. Tell him that you are hurt by his continuos paranoia. Make him understand that you really love him ;) If he really doesn't change, make the decision to either stay with him (even when he has that attitude) or break of with him. Either way, make sure that you are emotionally ready to face the consequences of the decision. Happy trip (if you really do make it to London). Make sure to visit Buckingham Palace. Heard (unfortunately, I haven't gone their yet) it was a blast from my friends who work there.

he doesnt trust u. If he does this before u met then god only save u after marriage my brother who is also a mylot user has a girl friend in philippines he's commited to her. I see him talking most of the time with her on the computer and even on phone but i don't think so he's so obsessive about her. I know distance kills but i need to say this if i wud be in ur position i wud ask him to shut his mouth shut his computer down and go to sleep lol. But he needs to change i seriously think u need to talk if he still doesnt change there's no other option but to dump him but ur engaged so think over my friend

getting married is a big step, you should not rush it. if you have this doubts and fear on your relationship coz of the way he's treating you now, it's not right to jump into the main level. it is essential that couple treat each other right. being away from home is hard enough, how much more if you're in another territory and having a relationship with respect and trust problems. you need time, you both need to know each other well, and need to make major adjustments yet. every person is different, and every couple go thru adaption and acceptance period, can you imagine how much it would take for both of you having different cultures? marriage is not a joke. you're young. take time to sort things out. if your love for each other is deep and real, you can wait til you clear things out, when you're both ready to take that big leap.

well i am a guy and yea there are times that we do hurt the people we love the most.why well maybe we boys are made like that.but please remember that to any relationship communicaiton is the key.make him aware as to how much he hurts yuo with his words and that u cannot take that.if necessary seek help from a counsellor.but more importantly communicate!that said i think that u guys shoold e able to work it out.and tell him that being possessive is not really that attractive a quality.give him a taste of his own medicine,start being possessive of him. mayi ask something,is he a scorpio? http://www.kriyayoga.com/ashram/index.html http://www.4therapy.com/locator/viewtherapist.php? uniqueid=1164&noemail=1 http://www.onlinecounselling.co.uk/

that was so sad.. if he really loves you, he must trust you.. i believed that the 3 most important thing in a relationship are love, trust and respect.. just tell him what you feel and if he understands you, he'll change..

Long distance relationships can be very hard-- especially if it's online-based, without having met the other person at all. I've been in a long-term online relationship before, so I can, to a certain extent, sympathize. We were together for about a year or so, and we were "engaged," as well. Really, though, I think that being engaged to someone else you haven't really met or have only met a few times is not always the best idea. A person can be VERY different from how they act online... You don't know if he is going to be as jealous or doubtful in person, or if he will be worse. Also, because you aren't able to be with that other person, trust can be a very big issue in online/long distance dating. I myself am a very insecure person, so I can relate to your boyfriend. Even if you spend most of the time talking to him-- and one webcam, at that, you still are not getting quite the same feel/vibe/visuals/communication (or whatever else you want to call it). You do not have that PERSONAL contact that can be so reassuring. Touch is not something that should be underestimated in its impact on a relationship. There's also the fact that they don't know your friends, and probably they have not even met them or know too much about them. Your boyfriend isn't going to see your life apart from the immediate location of the webcam, for the most part. It's...well, I guess scary, if you're afraid of losing someone. And sometimes a person that has such doubts...takes it out on the other person. Like, with me, I doubt myself (that is, I don't think I'm good enough), so I doubt my boyfriend. (Currently, I am dating someone in person. I couldn't take it anymore with the online guy-- a lot of that was trust related, but there's also the fact that he had been begging some other girls do things on webcam with him, then a month later started spending a lot of time/the night with a girl in person, so... That's the sort of thing I was always afraid of, and it happened, and after enough is enough.) But I don't want to think about how much I may or may not dislike myself, so I don't think about that-- and I use the fears I have in my relationship to distract myself-- every time he does something wrong, I dwell on it, and I add it into justifications for not trusting him. So, yeah. I guess I'm saying that I understand how your boyfriend feels... It's hard. On the other hand, when you're feeling HURT by his actions/words... See, if you have given him any reason not to trust you, that would maybe make things different. He might not be trying to hurt you-- he might just be releasing his anger, frustration, or his own hurt. It's painful to deal with betrayal, and sometimes people do that in ways that can be even more damaging to the relationship. But if you have done nothing to betray him or damage his trust in you, then he really is not behaving appropriately toward you. It really isn't right to take out insecurities or problems on others. Now, is he always blunt? Because some people are just like that, and they might not understand that it makes other people uncomfortable. But if he's just started or if he is only doing it toward you about certain things, well... I don't know what to say, really. He might just be really afraid of losing you, or he might not be the right guy for you. Because if this is how he is, and it hurts you, you can't expect him to change who he is entirely... If you love him, you love him for who he is. Of course he can work on certain things-- that's why it's important to understand if he is like this only about you/certain things, or if this is his general personality. But, either way, if you've expressed to him your feelings on the matter, and he hasn't tried to change at all, he just isn't willing, and if he doesn't care enough to try to make you happy, I don't think that either of you are ready to marry each other. I know this isn't really any help... I can understand how hard it is, but I can't really put any advice I might have into words. It's probably good to be taking a "time out" right now, just to evaluate how much you care about him and how much he cares about you. Because, from your article above, I can't tell how he feels for you, and I didn't really take away great feelings of love for him that you have... You said you do, but what you wrote sounded like you had already given up, but you felt guilty and were trying to justifiy it. (Or perhaps I'm reading too much of myself into this.) The only thing you can do is figure out what you want, and talk to him. No one here can tell you what to do. If he doesn't change, that doesn't mean that you are done-- because that is up to you. Be careful about teaching lessons this way, though... Don't treat it too much like a game-- having space can be good, but not if you're doing it spitefully. So, I guess my advice is to think about things yourself, first, and then talk to him in a serious, mature manner. That's the only way this can be dealt with. Oh, and also-- every relationship is going to have troubles. It's how you handle those troubles that make the relationship solid or not. Love comes with time. That means working through those troubles, and staying with your partner through it. That, in my opinion, is what defines a relationship.

Well I really think that it sounds like he has issues..and until he can deal with them this will continue. If he treats you like this now..it will be worse when you are married. I think you need to tell him how you feel and tell him if he can't change then you really can't see a future with him...You don't want to be married and then divorced a few months later...

I dont know what to say about this except if it was me I would be gone in a heart beat.

I would say if he doesn't change then I would call it a Day as that is terrible and it is not good at all I think you need to put it straight to him what point is there in a Relationship when there is no trust at all I am in a Relationship and we are 3 Hours apart at the moment and both of us have to trust the other we speak on the Phone everyday I am moving closer to him next year but we have been together 3 Years now and there is none of that what so ever

i think you should get rid of him before you become to involved,other wise it might be to late and you will suffer the rest of your life.

He doesn't trust you and he shouldn't be hurting you emotionally either. Explain how you feel to him and tell him that his jealously and possiveness has to stop. If it doesn't stop or at least slow down, then I'm sorry but you need to dump him. Give him the benefit of the doubt and a 2nd chance but make sure he knows how you feel and were he stands if it doesn't stop.

In my opinion, long distance relationship don't come with good ending. If he hurting you with his words, he is not the guy for you. as a guy, he must love his partner and trust her, not keep hurting her and control her. As 1 of my suggestion, it is no good to marry him. he can do anything he want but you cant, it is not fair.

i do'nt know how to solve that problem but i can say it's better to solve or try to solve it before.b'coz it will be very difficult after marriage b'coz after that men become more possesive,he just started thinking legal right on you.now you have time to think ,decide.once you will be married it will be more wiered.i am telling you,b'coz i got married after that i experienced he become more possesive.some timeit hurts lot first use your mind,think after that do whatever you think right

Real love is not merely feelings. It is a principle. It is how to change the character from good to better. If you really love with someone you are willing to change yourself for better unconditionally.

Well some people do have a perception that distant relationships donot work It worked for me too Well i used to chat with my gf on net talk to her on phone met her many times and we are into a relationship since 4 years It all depends seriously it seems that your bf isnt interested! So if at all he shows such signs its better to dump him

Sadly we men are like that, sometimes we only realise how much we need something after we loose it. And sadly, men dont change easily.

If he is actinglike this, and you haven´t even metin person yet i would be scared and i would not persue the relation. I do not belive that this relationship has a future, he sounds to be alittle bit possessive of you - imagine how it will be when u meet?

well i guess you have to fix that as soon as now. January is nearly fast approaching. He is obviously a very jealous guy. Being jealous is ok but too much of it is not good. He is very insecure and in that case he dont trust you. As soon as now you have to make it clear to him because if he dont trust you here what more if your there. What could be the worst thing to happen if someone is too much over jealous.

i'm a Filipino too! ^_^ yeah..boys can be really possessive but that is not an excuse for them to say harsh words that can be very offensive. i think you need more time to know your boyfriend more before finally tying the knot. and if he can't still control his temper then that means you won't be happy together so might as well go on separate ways.

i think it s a matter of compromise with mutual understanding so that both of u can understand the value of true relationship