That's SO Insulting!!!
By ParaTed2k
@ParaTed2k (22940)
Sheboygan, Wisconsin
December 27, 2006 4:52pm CST
To me, a well thought out insult is a sign of a great mind... a work of art even! Whether philosopher, comedian, entertainer, politician or blogger, a quick wit and sharp tongue can slam a bozo in just a few words. They are also one of our guilty pleasurew. We pretty much know that they are the lowest form of humor, but hey, people say puns are the lowest, but I love them!
So here are a few of my own, and some of my favorites for movies and tv. ("my own" simply means those I use... some are original, others I just picked up along the way).
My Own:
~Oxygen Thief!
~Waste of Human Flesh!
~Out of all the people I don't like.. you're ten of them!
~This morning I saw something that reminded me of you... then I flush!
~I'd spit in your face, but that would be too insulting... to the spit!
~Were you born a complete idiot, or is this just a midlife career change?
~Bush Bash Bus!
~Vomit Eating Phlegmbot!
From Books, Movies and TV:
~You Don't Even Know Where Your Towel Is! ~Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
~Just guess... I bet Will Rogers never met you!~ Col Potter to Major Winchester (MASH)
~You guys are as dumb as a bag of hammers~ Everett (O Brother Where Art Thou)
~If I promise to miss you, will you go away? ~ Dot (Animaniacs)
~You're the only friend I have in the world, and you're such a loser! ~Kim Kelly (Freaks and Geeks)
So, bring 'em on!!! What are your favs?
1 person likes this
16 responses
@whiteheather39 (24403)
• United States
28 Dec 06
I agree and I have been quite proud of my one liners. I have been complemented several time which has amazed me because then come out without even thinking about them. Some naughty some nice it seems I have no control over them, they seem to have a mind of their own.
1 person likes this
@ParaTed2k (22940)
• Sheboygan, Wisconsin
29 Dec 06
Apparently I didn't really realy really annoy you with this thread. ;~D
@ParaTed2k (22940)
• Sheboygan, Wisconsin
29 Dec 06
I don't go around making it a point to insult people either... but there are just times (and people) that warrant a good zinger. ;~D
@ParaTed2k (22940)
• Sheboygan, Wisconsin
29 Dec 06
The best weapon in the arsenal of the half-armed. ;~D
@ESKARENA1 (18261)
•
27 Dec 06
i think one of the best i have ever heard is the line found on a job reference form which stated, if you give this man a job you will be robbing a village of an idiot.
Also i like the line, dont be an idiot all your life, take a day off
noddleheaded dollyplop has to be the best word ive heard flung in insult though
by the way, good topic thankyou
1 person likes this
@ESKARENA1 (18261)
•
28 Dec 06
so many bottom holes giving non posts ive been through and reported the lot, have fun keep posting, btw bottom hole is a good one i heard yesterday when my 7 year old called it my 4 year old lol
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
28 Dec 06
here in the philippines, there are lots of comedy bars to go to. what the host does is, they make the audience laugh and have a good time by insulting one audience (or even more). it's okey for as long as the one insulted is not an irritable person. for as long as he is "game" to what is happening around, it's okey. but, sometimes, we need to understand that not all people are the same. some might understand you and some may not. some might get hurt and some might find it funny. we just need to be conscious when saying words so as not to hurt those people who are fragile.
@ParaTed2k (22940)
• Sheboygan, Wisconsin
29 Dec 06
ah, so that's what Michael Richards and his buddies in the audience were going for. ;~D
@ParaTed2k (22940)
• Sheboygan, Wisconsin
29 Dec 06
Ah, swear words... the ploy for insulters with no imagination.
@owlwings (43910)
• Cambridge, England
28 Dec 06
Here are some of my favorites. I like insults with 'style':
"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
-- Charles, Count Talleyrand
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
-- Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
-- Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
-- Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
-- Oscar Wilde
@runsgame (2031)
• India
28 Dec 06
i feel pity for this insulting... it is not advisable to insult any one. because u know if u insult a person 2 day , u will be insulted by some body later either 2 day or 2 morrow. the pain faced by the insulted person can well better be measured by the pain got by the insulted person only. the opponent cannot measure the depth of strength of insult. Please , God sake do not insult any body
@ParaTed2k (22940)
• Sheboygan, Wisconsin
28 Dec 06
Yup, I could end up being the insulted person... and if it's a good one, I'll offer my congratulations. ;~D
@SageMother (2277)
• United States
28 Dec 06
You have hit on som eof my favorites. I particularly love telling pushy guys that I bet ther family tree resembles a telephone pole.
@ParaTed2k (22940)
• Sheboygan, Wisconsin
29 Dec 06
Another classic, although I prefer the "bamboo chute" version.. just sounds better. ;~D
"His family tree is a bamboo chute"
See what I mean? ;~D
@peaceful (3294)
• United States
6 Jan 07
Here's one:
Although it's been years since there been an ordinance that allows for ape hunting, I really think that you should be more cautious...
Here, wear this orange vest for safety's sake...
