Jokes

Mrs Kartar had bought a beautiful sweater for her husband. She sent it to her husband by parcel post along with a note. The note said: ' The buttons of the sweater are removed since they where too heavy and added to the postage . You will find them in the right hand pocket of the sweater.

1. ~*How to make a Blonde Laugh*~ Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?? A: Tell them a joke on Wednesday!! 2. Blonde and her job interview... A Blonde airhead goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer starts with the basics. "So, Miss, can you tell us your age, please?" The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for half a minute before replying "Ehhhh... 22!" The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. "And can you tell us your height, please?" The young lady stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag. She then traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces "Five foot two!" This isn't looking good so the interviewer goes for the real basics; something the interviewee won't have to count, measure, or lookup. "Just to confirm for our records, your name please?" The airhead bobs her head from side to side for about ten seconds, mouthing something silently to herself, before replying "MANDY!" The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he asks - "What in the world were you doing when I asked you your name?" "Ohhhh, that!" replies the airhead... " I was just running through that song - 'Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear...' " 3. Panda Bear A panda bear walks into a restaurant and orders a sandwich. When he receives the sandwich he eats it and then shoots the waiter and leaves the restaurant. A policeman sees the panda and tells him he just broke the law. The panda bear tells the policeman that he's innocent and, if he didn't believe him, to look in the dictionary. The policeman gets a dictionary and looks up "panda bear." It says, ''Panda Bear: eats shoots and leaves.'' 4. Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit lived in the same forest, but they didn't like each other very much. One day, while walking through the woods, and they came across a golden frog. They were amazed when the frog talked to them. The golden frog admitted that he didn't often meet anyone, but, when he did, he always gave them six wishes, so he told them that they could have three wishes each. Mr. Bear immediately wished that all the other bears in the forest were females. The frog granted his wish. Mr. Rabbit, after thinking for a while, wished for a crash helmet. One appeared immediately, and he placed it on his head. Mr. Bear was amazed at Mr. Rabbit's wish, but carried on with his second wish. He wished that all the bears in the neighboring forests were females as well, and the frog granted his wish. Mr. Rabbit then wished for a motorcycle. It appeared before him, and he climbed on board and started revving the engine. Mr. Bear could not believe it and complained that Mr. Rabbit had wasted two wishes that he could have had for himself. Shaking his head, Mr. Bear made his final wish, that all the other bears in the world were females as well, leaving him as the only male bear in the world. The frog replied that it had been done, and they both turned to Mr. Rabbit for his last wish. Mr. Rabbit revved the engine, thought for a second, then said, “I wish that Mr. Bear was gay!” and rode off as fast as he could. i know a lot of jokes. but i am bored and i will not post here. bye.

whose is big simbran , Ramba? what u think! Ramba's is big she has capital R but Simbran has small r

One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for a while, he tells his daughter she can't do it because he's her half brother. the same problem happens again four more times! The girl starts to get pissed off. She goes to her mom and says, "Mom...What have you been doing all your life? Dad's been going around laying every maiden in the town and now I can't marry any of the five guys I like because they have turned to be my half brothers. Her mom replies,"Don't worry darling, you can marry any one of them, he isn't really your dad".