cancer

I think what you are doing is very brave. Your children are old enough to know and to understand what is happening to their Grandma. Once you tell your children they will understand why you are so sad at the moment also. As far as you being at greater risk of contracting cancer I would make sure you go to the doctors regularly and have tests to see if there is any in your system. ((Hugs)) to you and your family at this awful time.

I would tell them but would maybe wait untill after their visit but then again it maybe the last time they do see her so they do have a right to know but I do agree with you that to make it a happy memory for them make sure you take lots of photo's and make it a happy time.. Big Hugs for you It must be hard for you... My Grandma and her mother and so forth have all had cancer and I am terrified of getting it...

What does your mom want you to do? Does she want them to know or does she prefer to spend the time with them, without them knowing? I would do whatever she wishes in this case.

I personally would tell them hope but everyone has their own reasons, children seem to handle things more than we give them credit!

Hugs Dear Friend this is not an easy subject to talk about with children but they do have a high understanding. I have been frank with mine and they have appreciated this frankness. Cancer is a word not a sentence.

cancer is just a very major hurdle.. i hope you mother gets well.. and fights a winning battle.. i shall pray for her.. cheers!

You know your children better than anyone else _hope_ and only you can decide what to them as well as when you should. I am sad for you about your mother but if she can be brave, then so can you. There are times when people do astound everyone though, and can survive for much longer than people would expect them to. We currently have a friend in this situation and although it is only a matter of time, this has also been the case for the past 5 years since he was first diagnosed. Certainly make sure that you get plenty of photos of your children with your Mum, as well as other family members. Perhaps tell them towards the end of the visit, but do not leave it till the night before you part company. You and all your family _hope_ will be in my thoughts and prayers through this particularly difficult time.

I think that it is smart but dont lie to them

i think u shouldnot tell ur childre about this. there is no matter in making them upset. if they come to know about this then they will b in same pain as u r .

I believe this dreaded word is permanent in my lifetime. I am 53. I also believe i will be a future cancer victim. I smoke but hope to do something to stop. I feel so stupid to say I have done nothing to try and stop smoking. I'm fully aware there is help available. We lost both parents to cancer. Dad in 93 at the age of 67 to lung cancer, Mom in 2005 at the age of 84 to stomach cancer. Our dad passed away 2 months after being diagnosed,our mom just 1 month after diagnosis. I miss them so dearly and I do regret holding back some of the love I so wish I could show them today. Please tell your children so they won't be saying I shoulda, coulda, woulda. God Bless.

Its children already are great to understand that its grandmother is sick. I think that they had understood and increased its feelings for its grandmother. You have that to consult a doctor to have the certainty that is all good with you. Therefore to treat itself in the beginning it is the best way to cure itself of an illness.

they old enough to tell them i guess they know what cancer is

Your kids are old enough to know- heck, one of them is an adult! If I were them, I'd be extremely upset with you to find out she was dying, and that you and everybody else chose not to tell me. They have every right to know, unless your mother made you swear not to tell- that would be HER decision, and not yours. I can understand a person has a choice whether or not to keep an illness a secret, but I think that this is also a time when people need as much love and support as possible. What good does it do to keep it private and make people think all is well, when it's obvious you're wasting away, even "bravely"? Don't your children have a right to spend the time letting their grandmother know how much she is loved and appreciated? This is a chance for them to say goodbye.

Yes indeed cancer is a really dreaded word that scares the sh** outta me too. It was good on your moms part to put on a brave face. You are right in my opinion by not telling your kids about that as it will only make them sad..I wish your mother luck. Take care

i think they are of the right age to know how to deal with the situation. they might pity her but they will also make an effort to make her happy and spend valuable time with her knowing that she is suffering from cancer. that is very sad to know, sorry. since you are also in a high risk of having cancer at least the warning will do you good as well. you just have to take care of yourself and your kids twice as much.

cancer is also on my mind alot because i had cervical cancer before they caught it in the early stages so they got rid of it through surgery so i was lucky.you are at risk but,it does not mean you will get it.my prayers go out to you and your family.your kids are old enough so i would tell them and stop keeping them in the dark about their grandma im sure they would want to know they still will have a good visit with her even if they do know.

i dont know i hope that cancers of all the types would b cures one day

Your children appear to be in the age where they can understand the feelings of their sick grandmother.cancer is really a killing giant and to come out of the grasps of it is really dificult.your mother seems to have great couragein facing the situation,may god help her.you may allow your children to go and stay with her for few days.

No I think you are doing the right thing.Do what makes you feel comfortable.Cancer effects so many people.Never feel wronge for not telling your 15 or 18.Your just been a caring parent.

no,i think its a great idea instead.giving enough time wtih your mother specially now is great..im sure it will brings more happiness to her and your children..it is really a good time to do that..