Lesbians and adoption..NO NO

As a Lesbian and Adoptee I feel very strongly about this but can see your point of view. For me, I was so glad I had a father even if he wasn't the best one in the world

I would have rather had two nice parents than the two homophobes I ended up with. Sure, I like having a mom and a dad, but I would have also liked having two moms or two dads. And more accepting parents would have been nice for when I came out of the closet.

Soul, I couldn't agree with you more. A "male" model is essential if the adopted child is a boy.

as i said we are faced with teasing and issues no matter what our parents are...does that mean we should deny these loving people a child for fear of more teasing given to the child??? do we have that right when that may be the only thing the child has to deal with as opposed to others who may have drunk parents, criminal parents, deformities or disabilities, different religions and backgrounds....anything..?

Like you said at the end though, kids can get teased for all sorts of things. I have amblyopia and as a kid, had to wear a patch on my eye sometimes. Other kids had to wear it more than I did (I kind of just gave up on that). Now that was a lot worse teasing than having two mommies. Besides, it's not like all the other kids would even know. People almost never saw my dad at school. For all they knew, I might have had two mommies.

I agree! Children growing up in nuturing, loving alternative style homes are more accepting to the diversity in the world, they are more open and well rounded I've found...My kids are a great example of course my beign their mother thats natural for me to say but if you ask anyone that knows my kids whether its their grandmother (my husbands mum), their aunts and uncles, cousins or their teachers and the parents of their friends, they will agree...

I think most people responding do have the interest of the child in mind. When you were adopted, how old were you? Did you live in a group home before? Kids get teased for anything.

Well said Taj. I think a lot of the responses to this post seem to be dealing with their own desires and not really that of the child. As I stated earlier in this discussion, I am adopted and a lesbian and I know it's hard enough at times to have this orientation let alone being adopted as well. I didn't want children myself until my brother and his wife had their first child. I did have the opportunity to adopt a child many years ago. When the time came to make a final decision, I just knew I couldn't go ahead with it because I felt very strongly that any child deserved a chance to have a mother and father. I paid a high price with that decision but it is one that I am proud of. That child was eventually adopted by a wonderful heterosexual couple and he is very happy and content.

Thank you for your intelligent and kind comment. I agree with everything you say and of course I realise, that for various reasons, children are often reared by only one parent and turn out just fine. Yes, children can be very cruel. I was laughed at and singled out as a child just because I was adopted. I would have hated to have had the extra burden of being laughed at because I had 2 mothers or 2 fathers. I know things have changed in the 'permissive society' we now live in, but I don't necessarily see those changes are for the best................and kids are still kids, they can still be very cruel. I may be a lesbian (not by choice) but that doesn't mean that I need to push for 'so-called' gay and lesbian rights. I really think some of them do themselves a dis-service by pushing for the right to have children, parading themselves garishly on their Gay Pride marches etc

Let me tell you, there are many parents I've met that are by no means good role models! If lesbians are going through the adoption process, at least you know that if they passed, they're good parents. It's much more rare for bad parents to be able to adopt.

Homosexuals are also a part of nature's creation. We're here, aren't we?

So basically, the whole thing is a scam put on just for the daughter? That sounds ridiculous to me! Great values... teaching the child that it's perfectly okay to be in the closet and pull off a lie!

Maybe the girl is confused because it hasn't been explained to her. Maybe you should educate yourself and help her. It doesn't make it a bad thing just because many people in society still do not understand.

Straight people can break up too, that's definitely not limited to gay couples! Nice photo. ;)

Bluejay, how long were you in foster care though? If at all?

I have been orphaned as you would know if you had read the my first post correctly................and a "kid" as you put it does care about having a real mother and real father.........below is a comment I posted to taj_nijjar2002 Well said Taj. I think a lot of the responses to this post seem to be dealing with their own desires and not really that of the child. As I stated earlier in this discussion, I am adopted and a lesbian and I know it's hard enough at times to have this orientation let alone being adopted as well. I didn't want children myself until my brother and his wife had their first child. I did have the opportunity to adopt a child many years ago. When the time came to make a final decision, I just knew I couldn't go ahead with it because I felt very strongly that any child deserved a chance to have a mother and father. I paid a high price with that decision but it is one that I am proud of. That child was eventually adopted by a wonderful heterosexual couple and he is very happy and content.