should i call it quits?
By dmanuel
@dmanuel (411)
January 3, 2007 12:57am CST
i've been with my bf now for almost 3 years and we are living together. he already asked me if i want to mary him and i said yes. but as time goes by i feel that i don't want to anymore. we always argue about money because he is still supporting his whole family and it pains me to see him with his old clothes and shoes and with all his frugal life. he doesn't splurge on anything if it's for him because he feels that his family needs it more. i woke up one day and realized i can't marry this kind of guy, because he has his own family to attend to. we can't even have our own savings. i mean, am i being out of line? in case you're wondering if I love him, well yes i do! but i just love myself more and refuse to be a victim! any advice?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@umjuna (100)
• Netherlands
4 Jan 07
First of all, it is your feeling that counts the most, if you do not feel okay with the whole situation and the idea of getting married if things remain as they currently are. Than you really need to listen to does feelings. But to be honest the discription you give about your boyfriend sounds quit nobel. A man that feels responsable for his family is not that easy to find. If you would marry and possibly have kids with him, chances are he will stick around and make sure he is there to take care of his family members. Do you really miss anything? I mean are you leaving in poverty while is family lives in luxery?
@lonewolfnan (4366)
• Canada
3 Jan 07
No advice.You already know you have to do what is best for you in the long run.Also,marriage is accepting each other as they are and not "expecting them to change".
Tough choices for you to make and all the best in the future.
I do have advice after all.....no action is the worst action.Whatever you decide,accept the consequenses.
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
3 Jan 07
Well at least you know what you want and you have realised before it is to late
And I do need to say yes you love him but you do not love him enough to stand ny him through good and bad
That is how you know he is not the right one if he was you would stay with him no matter what
Good luck to you
