The Institute of Marriage - Origins and Secular vs Governmental

What would your views be on a commonm law marriage? It's neither secular nor governmental, however, it is recognized. What if you had a roommate for oh let's say 5 years. The 2 of you go your seperate ways, one of you "claims" you had a common law marriage and wants alimony, things you have accumulated during the time you both lived together, what then? Could this happen?

You have it totally backwards. Marriage is God's institution and God's idea. Read Genesis 1 and 2. Man did not initiate the marriage relationship, the Creator did.

very long wards i think i don't have understand what you say

Thank you so much for this post. I'm glad someone has posted this. I've pointed out similar in discussions about gay marriage, when people say that marriage is a religious institute and gays shouldn't have that. Marriage goes back before religion it's just many when they think of a wedding think of the typical religious ceremonies. However religion does not have to be any part of the marriage ceremony. It is dependent on what the parties in the marriage want and can have. We need to remember that.

The way i see it is that it doesnt really matter if you have a secular marriage. The governmental side is important for the benefits and law. But what i see as the most important thing about marriage is that the bond is treated with the upmost respect and care, it is as sacred as any god from any religion.

I`ve read an article about history of marraige, i`ll spee about this here : Medieval women faced dual responsibilities to religion and marriage. Throughout history, and even today, families arranged marriages for couples. The people involved didn't and don't have much to say about the decision. Most couples didn't marry because they were in love but for economic liasons. Some marriages were by proxy, some involved a dowry (bride's family giving money or presents to the groom or his family), some required a bride price (the groom or his family giving money or a present to the bride's family), few had any sort of courtship or dating, but most had traditions. One nearly universal tradition is that of the engagement ring. This custom can be dated back to the ancient Romans. It is believed that the roundness of the ring represents eternity. Therefore, the wearing of wedding rings symbolizes a union that is to last forever. It was once thought that a vein or nerve ran directly from the "ring" finger of the left hand to the heart. The notion of marriage as a sacrament and not just a contract can be traced St. Paul who compared the relationship of a husband and wife to that of Christ and his church (Eph. v, 23-32). Joseph Campbell, in the Power of Myth, mentions that the Twelfth century troubadours were the first ones who thought of courtly love in the same way we do now. The whole notion of romance apparently didn't exist until medieval times, and the troubadours. The statement of Pope Nicholas I in which he declared in 866, "If the consent be lacking in a marriage, all other celebrations, even should the union be consummated, are rendered void", shows the importance of a couple's consent to marriage. It has remained an important part of church teaching through the years. There appeared to be many marriages taking place without witness or ceremony in the 1500's. The Council of Trent was so disturbed by this, that they decreed in 1563 that marriages should be celebrated in the presence of a priest and at least two witnesses. Marriage took on a new role of saving men and women from being sinful, and of procreation. Love wasn't a necessary ingredient for marriage during this era. Years later, the Puritans viewed marriage as a very blessed relationship that gave marital partners an opportunity to not only love, but also to forgive. Many people hold the view that regardless of how people enter into matrimony, marriage is a bond between two people that involves responsibility and legalities, as well as commitment and challenge. That concept of marriage hasn't changed through the ages.

i think its the great contra secular with gov't coz its the dual system

In marriage both govermental and secular works together in my country, You had a very clear differentiation between the kinds of marriages that I never realized because attention was not really given regarding this,thanks for discussing

i think it depends only on the way the two partners take it...I may also consider God as my life partner and devote m whole life to him......

I agree. I also think that there are marraiges that are neither secular nor govermental. My own parents are an example of that. Although they did eventually end up marrying legally, the first 15 years of their life together they had were not married, although they referred to one another as "spouse." My father says that a union doesn't have to be sanctioned by the state in order to be blessed by God. I tend to agree. My brother and his partner have been together for 8 years. They are raising three kids and are as married as any married couple. They just cannot attain the paperwork to prove it.

Marriage is the most important relationship a person is going to be involved in. Just as a religion sees a person as "devotee" while the government sees him as a "civilian"- his relationship marriage is also viewed by different people in different ways-- so this relationship is as complex as the person itself. That is the origin of the confusion. According to me, marriages are a necessary evil.