broken trust

to begin with, it really is tough to have, or should i say, maintain a long distance affair. I don't know...well, atleast for, me because who wouldn't agree...long distance relationships are hard to nurture, unguarded as you both can do things freely because of so much space you guys have in-between. Maybe i have to share, that i, once 'subsconsciously' cheated on my now boyfriend for three years. When i told him about it, he forgave me only because I promised not to do it again. And that promise is more than than just beyond words. I let my actions speak for the regret I feel... and we got back together. But in your case, how in the world could she make you believe in her if youre apart? Its just so hard.... so I think its best if you keep yourself away from this girl. What she did makes your long distance relationship even harder. So i think i have to give back whatever you said to me...move on, you deserve someone else....definitely better than this girl.

love without trust is not love anymore. Thats my thought. When my ex bf did that to me like what happen to you the trust is also gone so its really difficult to have the relationship back when you always have the doubt in your heart. He wants me back but although i still love him i never give him the chance because it will never be the same as before. Its still hurt but i have to move on. That's what they called love is blind because when times like that we tend to overlook those big mistake that could be a trigger to break relationship. Remember cheater is always a cheater and sometimes when we give chance to those people they tend to abuse it since they know that they are love. In your case you give her the chance so just make sure she is worthy of that chance and she deserve it. Its not a reason that both are in long distance that they should seek love to others, thats very stupid reason and i dont believe that, if you really love someone and you commit yourself, you should hold on to that and remain faithful.

I had a guy cheat on me once and I tried so hard to forgive and forget. Only I couldn´t. the pain was there and the trst was gone so we broke up. Noone except you can take this decision. If u think you can manage to forgive than go for it, but if not - there is someone else out there for you!

If you really love her, then you have to trust her. Love always stands on the trust you have on your partner. Do you know why she left a guy? You should know the reason. If she just left because of some stupid reason, then it is quite dangerous. But you should have thought this, before you give a her a second chance. If you loos trust and leave her alone, you are the one who is going to ditch her. So talk to her about it. If she really knows what she is doing, if she promises just go on. why do you want to hurt her. Who knows, she might be hurt too by the incident happened to her with an other guy!!!

that is pretty bad man! a long distance relation is based largely on trust and love. it lacks the security and proximity of a close relation. you say that you both still love each other. but she has once broken your trust. i think, if she didnt love you, she wouldnt have agreed to go on with your affair when you found out about her. the fact that she wanted to continue with the affair, and promised not to repeat the incidence, shows that she still loves you. and she still treasures you more than the other guy with whom she broke up. so i think a second chance should be given. after all, anyone can be tempted into a little adventurism... even if it is not love, the thrill of having a face to face affair could have driven her to the other guy. she doesnt get this feeling from you because of the long distance. although this is no reason to justify cheating, this reason can be used to justify giving a second chance. love should be strong and beyond small slips. but again, love shouldnt allow any slips either. so if she slips again, i think it will be time to say quits. but anybody deserves a second chance, especially if she wants the second chance badly. the fact that she wants another chance with you itself speaks that she still loves you. i know it is very difficult to repose trust once it is broken. but for the sake of future, when your love might bring the best days of all time in your life, when you get together finally, crushing down your ego and pain seems a relatively small price to pay. the pain might be great, but the dream could be sweeter! so try and reconcile, but make sure she realises that another acto fo cheating will severe all bonds with her.

Seriously if you don't want to get hurt then you mise well just break the long distance relationship. yes SOMETIMES they might work but honestly you can't expect her to just.... do nothing. it's not fair to either one of you IMO.

it's hard to stitch back trust again. once it is broken, it will leave a mark forever in the history of your relationship. i understand you since i had been dumped many times before by my stupid exes because of other women. but i moved on. i can live without them. as for you, you decide for yourself. if you still love her, then go on loving her. and if she breaks your trust again, then, the relationship is not worth it anymore.

If the relationship is long distance...then how do you know she is telling the truth about breaking up with him?..ect. ect. ..if the relationship is still where it was when she cheated then she will indeed stray again and you are right NOT to trust her. Once someone has "cheated" there isn't much of a chance of going back and in your relationship her changing her personality and what it is about her that allowed her to do that to you in the first place

Yes it is very hard to believe your girlfriend but then again everybody deserves a second chance as maybe she did not mean to do this at all, as sometimes it does happen, especially when you are so far apart from each other. I do hope for yoursake that you can work your relationship out.

Trust is hard to regain. I have known friends where in situations similar to yours have seemed to work out. Recently, one such friend admitted even years later he still doesn't fully trust her though he does love her.

I'm not a guy,but I believe that If you love her and she loves you you must have trust in her and talk more often.I also had an distancce relationship but after 6yeras we will get merried,because we realize that we can live one without the other. I believe that you must to talk with she.I wish you luck!

it's obvious that we have different advices for you, are you willing to risk it? i know that it must have been frustrating. ask yourself have you really forgiven her? are you sure your to give her a 2nd chance of this relationship? if she love you so much she wouldnt have done that. i mean there you are thinking that she might be having a hard time like you because you were so far away from each other but what did you get? she cheated on you! if she were your wife will you still forgive her? think about it! sorry...

It hurts real bad, especially your ego. Your feelings for her will be a mixture of love and hate, at this point. Dont break up with her just yet, and dont propose marriage either. You will see another sign or pointer soon.

My oppinion is.....that if she cheated on you once, with all of her promisses, she can do it again!!!!Cause she think's that you will give her another chance!!!! Probably I'm wrong....but You know what's between you 2!!!

uhm... if you cannot trust her anymore, it's useless to continue your relationship. If you continue, it will be more problem will be there

You long distance relationship is very hard for each of you..But the only key to have ur relationship stronger is trust but when ur girlfriend cheated you once, there's a possible reason she can do it again.You never know coz she is far from you..And you say that u dont have trust her this time, so why you gave her another chance..It means you did not love her anymore. What is the use of having a relationship wihtout trust...Im not telling you to gave up your relationship wiht your girl..it is still up to you..Its very easy to say a word but very hard to do it sometimes.

Well I am not a guy but I do believe everyone deserves a second chance and if your going to give it to her try your best to totally forgive her. Long distance relationships are hard. She messed up she regrets it and if you love her try to get over it.

Well talk to her ...say that u love her very much ...tell her that u cannot live without her....thinkin that one day she will come to u ....u should tell her that love is ur life n u cannot live withiut her..........

well ive been through this before with my ex and i dated her for about 3 months and then found out at that point that she had been dating another guy prior to me so i guess i was the other guy but i had no idea up until that time. She had claimed to me that she wanted to be with me because the other guy was abusive blah blah blah and she went as far as telling me that she had broken up with him but as it turns out she hadnt and again we went through the same thing with me finding out and everything and this time she broke up with me and that was the end of our relationship even though we are still very close friends.

long distance relationship could be so hard at times. the fact that you and your partner are apart could loss communication. i think that might be the reason why she cheated on you. in your absense she probably became lonely and a company might have been an answer to her problem. im happy that you gave her another chance she didnt mean that to happen the fact that she broke up with the guy and "wont do that again" meant she had learned her lesson on the hard way. if you still feel hurt talk to her how you felt open everything that happen between her and the guy. besides if you love her what harm could it bring trusting her again-even it means getting hurt. without hurt you could not be a better person.i hope that could bring your trust back to her.