Windows is the solution!

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MicroSoft is not the answer, MicroSoft is the question, the answer is no. Why does the DOS version of a program always run faster on a 2 MB 16 MHz 386SX than the Windows version on a 8 MB 66 MHz 486DX2? Is MicroSoft a new toilet paper or what? The PC has created anarchy. Hardware and software have been thrown together in random configurations at the whim of any employee with access to an expense voucher and a computer catalogue. The result has been a financial and adminstrative nightmare for corporations. 640K ought to be enough for anybody said Bill Gates in 1981. I wonder how much the harddisk and RAM producers pay the Windows developers to write such ressource-demanding programs. Question: How many Microsoft engineers do you need to replace a broken light-bulb? Answer: None, Microsoft will standardize the darkness in such cases! Windows-95 makes Unix look like an operating system ! Competition of writing books about elephants: IBM: Big blue elephant. Novell: Linking elephants. Microsoft: Why you must buy Windows 95. PnP = Plug Not Play PnP = Plug aNd Phone PnP = Plus aNd Pray 1995: DOS is dead. Bill. 1998: Bill is dead. DOS. 1995: DOS is dead. Bill. 1998: C:\copy con prn Bill is dead. ^Z Question:What is the difference between Windows and an apple ? Answer:Apples only fall down once a year. NT = Not Today If MicroSoft would sell cars: the model of a given year would be available one year later you have to buy a new car, if any traffic signs change your car would stop sometimes and for some reason you think this is normal you can only drive in your car alone except if you have a Car95 or a CarNT there would be no controls for oil, gas or breaks - only a "unknown error" ligth people would be fascinated by all theese new features in car95 like doors and gearboxes they will have to use MicroSoft gas Windows = cheap Mac clone An Intel PC has four protections modes: Abort, Retry, Fail and Reboot Windows 95: 32 bit extensions and a graphical shell for a 16 bit patch to an 8 bit operating system originally coded for a 4 bit microprocessor, written by a 2 bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition. NT is not enterprise ready until MS is willing to support it. Bill Gates: If GM (General Motors) had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty five dollar cars that got 1000 miles/gallon. General Motors: Yes, but would you want your car to crash twice a day? error #123: This system has been running Windows for more than 6 hours without an error. Something must be wrong! Please reboot! MS Windows - the 3270 of the 21st century. In a world without walls and fences - who needs windows and gates ? "The obvious mathematical breakthrough would be development of an easy way to factor large prime numbers" [Bill Gates, The Road Ahead, p.265] GM vs MS