Do you think child support should be a prerequisite for visitation rights?

I think the child still needs to know who his father or mother is. The issue of child support should be between the parents and the young child should not even know about it. My brothers ex-wife gave up custody to my brother because she could not financially take care of my nephew. It was a very hard thing to do, but she wanted to do what is best for the child. At this point, she still can not afford to pay, because of her low income and inability to support herself. My brother does not push the issue. My nephew still loves his mother and she loves spending time with him. I guess it depends on the situation, and what the non-custodial parent can afford.

Hi! This is a tough issue. My first instinct would be to say that if no support is being paid, then the non-paying parent shouldn't have the right to see the child. But is that fair to the child? Unless the non-paying parent is abusive or there is an issue like that involved, I can see that this would punish the child more than the parent.

well it really depends..i think that if the parent is a good parent besides thefact that hes not paying but is good with the children then yes..a child needs to know there parents and it is very important for them to see them...regardless of what the issues between tehre parents may be..my husband and i was seperated for 2 yrs and i never got child support because we shared oru time with our son together..he pays for food and etc when he was there adn viceversa..a child needs both there parents and by not allowing them to see there parents because of money is selfish

No I don't think it should be. Don't get me wrong, when I say the Dad visiting the child, I'd be upset that they weren't paying anything but I'd hold it inside and then complain to it later to my friends when my child couldn't hear me. I have 3 kids. All by the same man. He pays child support sometimes. Last month we were lucky to get $188. He does not want to see the kids and I have found out that he has even more children I didn't know about. If he expressed an interest to see the kids, I would be thrilled. Thrilled because it hurts so much that their dad doesn't want anything to do with them and I'd love to know what it was like to have a dad who cared for the kids. As long as the parent is not a bad influence, I think that child support shouldn't be tied in to visitation. But maybe a restriction in place as to how often he can see the child if he doesn't pay support? I don't know. What I DO know is that I wish their father would want something to do with them. Even a freakin' card for them once in a while would be OK with me...

This is a tough issue and one that my friend is going through. She had a child at 16 (dad never supported her) and then married a man and had three more (he adopted the oldest). When their marriage broke up, she had been a stay-at-home mom and had no skills to support her family, so naturally, she filed for alimony and child support. I don't even think it's been 3 years but her ex has only paid alimony--he owes over $10k in child support! (how the court let him get away with it is beyond me!) She doesn't limit him from seeing the kids and his family spoils them rotten! The boys (3 of them) really need their dad at this time and the little girl is a 'daddy's girl', so she's swallowing her pride and doing what's best for the kids.

not really, but if i wear the father of the child who is not giving support to my child, i think it's a big insult to me and i would be shy to fo & visit the kid in his mother's house. moreover, support is a requirement of the court whether you visit the kid or not.

I think that if someone is not paying child support, they should not be allowed to see their children. It costs alot of money to raise a child. You need money for clothes, food, shelter, schooling, etc. If someone feels they do not have to help pay these expenses, then they do not really love their child and do not deserve to be a part of their life.

I personally do not allow my son's father to see him. The reason is because he does not help with support at all. If it was not for me feeding, clothing, and taking care of his needs, my son would not be alive for him to see my son.

No because it shows they don't want to share the cost of raising the child they created, but then again some people that do pay only do it so they won't get in trouble in court. It depends on the if the absent parent really is trying to be a parent.

I think it should be examined on each child, if it is in their best interest then they should be able to see their parent even if they are not paying child support, but I don't think it should be an automatic right of a non paying parent. I just don't think children should be kept from the parent if they really want to see them. That is going to cause problems of resentment later if you do that. They will not think you are doing what is best for them by not allowing them to see their father or mother. Then you are the bad guy and that is hard to get through. I never used my daughter to get at my ex. If she wanted to see him, I allowed it. He never got to see her at his own request because he never requested. That situation took care of itself without me having to say one word. Now she pity's him and doesn't really have an interest in visiting anyway. I never discussed the money or support with her around or said her father was a deadbeat. She can see that for herself, which is sad because it can effect their self esteem of you don't talk to them about it.

First of all in my state it is illegal to withhold visitation rights for not getting child support. In our state you can go to child support inforcement and they will go get it for you. Plus look at the message it sends your child. "My mom/dad won't let me go see my mom/dad becasue they didn't pay this month. Forgetting the fact that they already have a love for one another. Keeping it stable for a child is more important, but yes money is improtant also, just keep it out of kids life in this respect. Professionals are out there to help collect any and all money due of what court order states. But always put your child before money no matter what.

I think it depends on the situation. My mother wouldnt let me see my father because he never paid child support, and when i was 16 i met him on my own, and well, she was doing me a favor by not letting me see her. He owes over 10000 dollars in child support and im 22 now and he still wont pay her. My oldest 2 children, their father gets his child support directly taken out of his check, but he chooses not to see them. Then my 2 year olds father, he dont pay a dime, but i let him see him when he want to, problem is, he doesnt want to. I dont think keeping a child from their father is right over money, unless there is another reason behind it, like my mother had. If they arent a good father anyway, and it will onlu hurt the child more to spend time with him, then yea, you cant see him till you give me some money. But like i said, situations vary.

Very tough issue. Its hard to get by these days. I am in the middle of a divorce, three very young children who love their father dearly. I work full time and barely make ends meet. My soon to be ex, has not worked since Feb. of '06. I get some state aid, but not nearly enough...I have always tried to foster a relationship between our kids and their father. I wish more than anything for them to know that we both love them and will always be there for them. Would it be nice to get some financial help? Of course! Should this be something that the kids need to know about? Absolutley not! I have to admit...I wish it could be so easy...you dont pay, you dont see the kids. But like others have already posted...who is that hurting? The kids. They need all the love they can get in this world. We'll get by somehow, and hopefully someday soon, he will realise how much he is hurting me, and in turn them, by not helping out.

This is a really tough question. My ex does not pay child support, nor does he see our son. What hurts me more is the fact that he does not see our child. I would rather him take an interest in our son than for him to send me anything. Children need two things -- money and love. Ideally both should come from both parents, but we don't live in an ideal world. No amount of seeing a child a lot is going to put food in his mouth. On the other hand, no amount of money is going to replace a missing parental figure. I don't know about this one.

I think it depends on the situation. If my husband and I divorced I would still want him to see our son even if he got behind on child support. However, if I took my son to Daddy's, and Daddy didn't pay attention to him or take good care of him while he was there, I wouldn't want him to go. I have a friend who has two kids (20 months and 5 years old). She sends them to her ex's house with extra clothes and extra diapers and everything that they need for the weekend. When she goes and picks them up, sometimes they are still in the same outfit they had on when they left. And the little one always has a dirty diaper. He doesn't give them baths while they are there, and if she sends nice clothes, they disappear. I don't see any reason why she should have to send her kids to his house.

ok this is a tricky question... i think it would depend on the reason they arent paying their child support...