who shovels the snow in YOUR driveway?
By kittykatzz
@kittykatzz (1132)
United States
January 16, 2007 8:54am CST
i think its pretty darn sad that a friend of mine will wake her hubby (as he can sleep almost 2 hours later than her to be up for work) from a dead sleep in the morning ONLY to make him go outside and shovel!.. i mean she says she shouldnt have to becuase she's a woman!!!.. OMG.i mean.. i shovel us out just as often as my man does!... he tries to be proactive in the evenin sometimes and shovels a bit so its not SO much in the morning, but i do my fair share as well.. why is it so many woman dont shovel?? i KNOW its not that theyre incapable.. is it laziness?? and im not talking about if your a single woman, and have no choice.. but i sometimes jsut do it FOR my hubby cuz he's gotta go out to work and i dont.. when i was younger i used to shovel it for my mom cuz she worked at night and needed to be able to pull in the driveway in th emornin and my dad plowed snow for the state so he'd be gone WELL before it started building up.,. and as the oldest of 3 well it just kinda left me to do it.. but i didnt really mind too much and my mom was always thankful and rewarding..what do you think?? ALL opinions welcome..
7 people like this
29 responses
@infobyaj36 (907)
• United States
16 Jan 07
Yeah wake him up. First off your friend obviously works too. Why should she have to bust her butt before work just so her hubby can sleep. I am all for sharing the chores but that is only if they are shared, maybe this hubby still whines that he has no clean socks and acts as if laundry is beneath him. Well let him do the mans work and shovel then I say. But on the other hand if he is equal on what is at most times considered womens work then yeah lend him a hand. But from what you said I some how doubt that is the case.
3 people like this
@kittykatzz (1132)
• United States
17 Jan 07
never really thought of it that way.. she seems to me just like the kinda "needy" type..i should have gone into more detail ..not that her work isnt important too, but she only works 3-4 days a week (outside the home) and though he works a little later in the morning.. he seems to not get home till much later.. i dont know ALL the stats.. shes friendly but still just a neighbor.. i just thought they were kinda funny out there other morning arguing back and forth .. you could tell he was still in pj's lol..
@onesiobhan (1327)
• Canada
17 Jan 07
Does she have a bad back?
I used to do most of the snow shovelling, but I hurt my back a couple of years ago and I still have to be careful. If it's heavy or icy, my husband does it.
3 people like this
@mkirby624 (1598)
• United States
16 Jan 07
Hmm, well i wouldn't say that I wanted him to do it because he was my husband, but I would wake him to do it so I could get ready for work and wouldn't have to shovel and try to get ready for work. You can't do it after your ready for work, you'll get disgusting, and if the snow is heavy enough and you do it before you get ready, there's almost an hour there for the snow to rebuild.
I live in mississippi however, so seeing snow is a big deal....and most of the time it doesn't even stick. my husband sometimes goes outside to crank my car and warm it while I'm getting ready :) either that or he starts my breakfast while I go outside to crank it.
3 people like this
@thinkingoutloud (6127)
• Canada
16 Jan 07
My husband *usually* does the shoveling but I also do my share. I have no problem doing it but he'll often tell me not to... he likes being out there. Yesterday, we got a darn good snowfall and he had to work overtime. I knew that was going to make him really late getting home, since he'd get stuck in traffic. I didn't want him to come home, after all those hours, and have to shovel just to get the car in the driveway. I was home, so I went out and did the porch, stairs, walk and driveway before HE got home. He was so grateful :) BUT! I was the only woman shoveling on our whole street! Every other house, it was a man. In some cases, too, the women around here will stand at the door or in the window and just watch. It would seem to me the job would be a lot easier and a lot quicker if they just got out and helped.
2 people like this
@kittykatzz (1132)
• United States
17 Jan 07
agreed!.. i would have done the same!.. although sometimes in the evening its harder for me if im alone with a disabled child and a 2 year old inside.. its harder (even though im right outside) to leave them so i can be out to do it.. i never mind doing it in the morning though cuz im usually up so early and the kids are still sleeping..thanks for commentigng!
@kittykatzz (1132)
• United States
17 Jan 07
NICE... i wish we could all do things like this!.. seems you two have got your *##* together!.. lol ..it really is nice though to see couples trying to split these responsibilities down the middle!
@mom2boys (334)
• United States
16 Jan 07
I say if they both work then whoever gets to leave first SHOULD shovel it out!!! Seriously just cause you are a woman doesn't mean you are helpless come on now!!! Yeah chores go both ways when you work so she should have to do it too, why should just the man have to shovel, if you get to it first you should do it! Now say she has physical limitations, or was pregnant than by all means wake him up!
@kittykatzz (1132)
• United States
17 Jan 07
i agree with you.. i think she just dont wanna do it cuz shes a tiny little thing .. im sure she does stuff round the house.. but i think she just sees outside duties (shoveling, yardwork, garbage, mowing) as "man's work" lol
@ineedaname (957)
• United States
17 Jan 07
My husband and I both do it together. We went out and got it done in no time. Last time it snowed my son and I did it. My husband was out of town or we would have all been out there working. Just because you are a woman doesn't mean you can't shovel snow. It is a good work out. My shoulders are sore.
@patootie (3592)
•
16 Jan 07
Sigh .. I simply cannot remember the last time we had enough snow in Cambridgeshire, England to need to clear the pathways .. we rarely get more than an inch at a time ... no point in going out to shovel that is there ..
One other thing that makes me feel hesitant about clearing my paths is one of the UK's quaint laws is that if someone should fall over on my pathway .. AFTER I have tried to clear the snow away it's my fault ... but if they fall over and the snow isn't cleared it's not my fault .. weird or what
2 people like this
@kittykatzz (1132)
• United States
17 Jan 07
wow,, thats weird.. youd think it would be the other way around!.. well im in NH USA.. and we get our fair share... as for you it seems good that you dont considering the laws... weve gotta do our steps per agreement with our mailman, but other than that its for ourselves.. well..you learn something new everday i suppose!
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
17 Jan 07
Whenever it snows, my husband ALWAYS shovels. I never ask him to do it, he just does. He is such a gentleman that he doesn't want to see me performing such hard physical labor. We have 2 cars, and before he leaves for work, he always cleans my car off for me. Believe me, I reward him greatly for his chivalry...;)
2 people like this
@sweetee (420)
• Australia
17 Jan 07
We are suffering a really bad drought here in Australia.. What we would do to get rain, let alone snow! So as you can imagine none of my family have to shovel the snow - but if we ever got some i think we'd play in it first lol, then i'd help hubby move it..
@ControlledChaos (179)
• United States
17 Jan 07
Isn't it funny how some women want equality... Until it snows? lol
Seriously, I guess I'm sort of old fashioned about this sort of thing. I had two female roomates for a couple of years and I always made a point of shoveling the driveway and sidewalk so that they wouldn't have to. On the other hand, I'm one of those people who really, really respects those who can take care of themselves... so I'd probably be a bit upset if someone woke me up to shovel because THEY couldn't get out of the driveway.
2 people like this
@manniewoo (33)
• United States
17 Jan 07
Show one another respect in a relationship by sharing responsibilities! If you are fully capable of shoveling, do it! Remember that any relationship is a give-and-take situation. . . your significant other will do something nice for you sometime later if you share responsibilities that aren't particularly fun.
@adi_doank (96)
• Indonesia
17 Jan 07
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.i think you're right
my friend
2 people like this
@pyr0maniac (572)
• United States
17 Jan 07
In Southern california it does not snow, so i will never shovel my driveway.
@mnflower (1299)
• United States
16 Jan 07
My guess would be she thinks she is above this and that is not right, I would not even think of waking my man up if he had couple more hours of sleep before work no matter what..It would have to be pretty important..To many woman take there man for granted...Noone gets along perfectly but that doesn't give anyone the right to take away someone else's sleeptime from them for there own satisfation of going to work and saying I made my husband get up and shovel which I am sure she did...lol I am sorry I believe in being equal in the chores department and it sounds to me like he works as hard as her and deserves those extra couple hours of sleep...she should of done it herself.
2 people like this
@dmillman (2273)
• United States
16 Jan 07
Well, that depends. It's usually the landlord, but he doesn't always get to it right away so then it's our problem. My husband does the shoveling. I can't due to a back injury. So I guess it's whoever can get to it first so that me and my hubby are safe. Also, my hubby wakes up when he doesn't have to just to shovel the area for me. He wants to make sure that I'm safe, and this way he feels like he's helped me.
My parents are opposite now. It used to always be my dad. He'd get in a big snowsuit and snowblow the driveway and shovel other areas. As he got older, he invested in an electric shovel. But since his heart attack, my mother usually has to do it. Although, sometimes she'll get home and see that one of their friends or neighbors did it for them.
I think those friends of yours need to sit down and discuss their options. They both need to think of all the different options that could work for themselves and then compare the two lists to find the ones that they both agree on. From that list, they can narrow it down to the way they should do it normally and keep the others as back up plans.
@angelashupe (343)
• United States
17 Jan 07
WHEN we have snow - I do. Unless it snowed late at night. If that's so, then mom shovels before going to work. We are also both women, so women do know how to shoved, I promise =D
Honestly, it sounds like your friend is just lazy. She can do it just as well as he can. If she's perfectly heaththy, their is nothing to stop her from doing it herself.
2 people like this
@schmob (151)
• United States
16 Jan 07
I would be sooo angry if someone woke me up early JUST to shovel snow...argh! First of all, I hate snow. Cold, wet, yuk! Sometimes I'll shovel the snow, when I'm feeling generious. But it has to be at least six inches before I shovel it. I'm just too lazy.
2 people like this
@Hipponater (262)
• United States
17 Jan 07
Thats pretty bad... your friend can atleast do two lines for the car tires...
At my house usually my dad, brother, or I shovel. My mom doesn't because of other things, but none of us really mind. My mom won't wake up my dad to do it, he'll usually shovel before he leaves for work, and shovel my mom's side of the drive way too.
2 people like this
