is husband gay?

A person is gay if they are attracted to like being touched by someone of the same gender. Just because he is not touching you, this is not an indication that he is attracted to the same gender. From your message, you said that "he says he doesn't like it nor does he like to be touched". This is quite different from him saying that "he doesn't like touching women nor does he like touched by women". You say that you have been married for 9 years and he "never" touches you. If he has never touched you for 9 years, why does this make you wonder of if he is gay now?

Your post was a bit vague, but from what I can gather you are saying your husband doesn't like to touch you or be touched? Do you get on well with each other - do you enjoy each other's company? Can you laugh about things together? If the answer to these questions is 'yes' then you clearly still care and have love for eachother. It may be that your husband has problems that he doesn't feel ready to talk about, perhaps he has experienced an abusive past, or is concerned or stressed out about work? There are many things that could be causing these problems, and it does not necessarily mean that he is gay. Let your husband know that you are there for him and if he is unable to bring himself talk to you perhaps suggest he seek counselling.

i think that you might want to elaborate a little more on DETAILS so that it will be easier for people to understand what you are asking...lol