Do You have joke

A man decides to have a face-lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the results. On his way home, he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving, he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?" "About 35," was the reply. "I'm actually 47," the man says, feeling really happy. After that, he goes into McDonalds for lunch and asks the clerk the same question. The reply is, "Oh, you look about 29". "I am actually 47." Later, while standing at a bus stop, he asks an old woman the same question. She replies, "I am 85 years old, and my eyesight is going. But when I was young, there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your balls for 10 minutes, I will be able to tell you your exact age." As there was no one around, the man thinks, What the hell and lets her slip her hand down his pants. Ten minutes later, the old lady says, "Okay, it's done. You are 47." Stunned, the man says, "That was brilliant. How did you do that?" The old lady replies, "I was behind you at McDonalds."

recently started a blog on this topic humors so have a collection of some jokes there not much but still have some and will be uploading few more right now having problem uploading images right now http://keepsmiling4ever.blogspot.com/

The National Poetry Contest had come down to semi-finals between a Yale graduate and a redneck from Wyoming. They were both given a word, then allowed two minutes to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was “Timbuktu” First to recite his poem was the Yale graduate. He confidently stepped to the microphone and said: “Slowly across the desert sand Trekked a lonely caravan Men on camels, two by two Destination: Timbuktu.” The crowd went crazy. No way could the redneck top this, they thought. The redneck, with sweat rolled down his face, made his way to the microphone and said: “A friend and I a hunting went, We spied three maidens in a tent, They being three, we being two, I bucked one and Tim bucked two.” The redneck went to the finals.

Driving to work,a gentlman had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of a truck in front of him over for reckless driving.Fortunately,another officer had seen the carton in the road.The policeman stopped traffic and recovered the box.It was found to contain large upholstery tacks. i`m sorry sir, the first trooper told the driver, But i am still going to have to write you ticket. Amazed,the driver asked for what. The trooper replied, Tacks evasion.