Am I a bad mother? What is wrong with me?

You are usually so good, and have given me loads of good support, I am sorry and worried that you are so fed up I think that you may need to have a little time for yourself. YOU ARE NOT A BAD MUM - please don't get down like that. I get like this sometimes, if you go to the Dr they will say you are depressed and give you tablets. Is there a friend who can give you an hour or so to go shopping by yourself or out for a treat that you enjoy. Do you take your kids to any play sessions or mums support groups, the kids get to play and you get to moan, it's helpful if you can bring yourself to take them. Plus they get to play with other kids which helps socialise them. Even taking them to the park and letting them run around until they are worn out will make you feel better. Sometimes kids are annoying- mine can be horrendous and sometimes I just want to get in the car and run but I never do. I just leave them with their dad while I nip to the beach with my dog or meet a pal for coffee, at the worst I go to Tesco late at night when they are asleep and Shrek is there then I get myself a new outfit and some treats to make me feel human again. Sometimes as mums we loose who we are inside and then the frustration Kicks in. I truly hope that you feel happier again soon, if you want to pour it all out you can send me a private message, I promise to listen and not to judge.

Ummmm Honey~ You need a BREAK! That's what's wrong. You need to ask your hubby/boyfriend for a night out! You tend to get burnt out and cranky when you do the same things all day everyday! Go out and have some fun!!!

No, your not a bad mother. It sounds like maybe you need to take some time to yourself. Get yourself a babysitter and get away for a couple of hours. Get your hair done, go to lunch with a friend, go catch a movie. Something that will get you out. I think you'll find you are stressed because of the same routines and not taking time out for yourself.

I, too, have felt the same way, a lot! I have 3 kids ages 8, 7, and 5 and it just seems to get worse. They all fight with each other constantly. At times, I just hated being around them. Especially when we are all in the car. It has gotten better though. We now play games with them and have introduced more time outs. Taking away their toys work too. Your kids are a little bit younger than mine, but time outs are great. Just make sure to follow through and not give too many warnings. And, as many people have said, try to take a break. Even if it inside your own house by taking up a hobby. Walking around the neigborhood is a great idea. Exercise and your own thoughts at the same time! Good luck and hang in there. It does get a lot easier to find time to yourself when they start going to school.

I know people are telling you that you need a break and you do. I am a nanny for five and let me tell you I know exactly how you feel. I look forward to the weekend and it is the only thing that gets me through the week sometimes. It might help out if you sent the to something like a childcare center at a high school since they only have their program for a few hours and you could send them on the days that you feel you need the extra space and a little break even if it is just to take a nap of soak in the tub for a little while. I hope that this helps you and good luck.

First of all take a deep breath. I know how frustrating it is to stay at home all day with two young children. It sounds like you are just needing some time out for yourself. There's nothing wrong with that. You shouldn't feel guilty for being frustrated or losing your temper. It happens to all of us from time to time. Is there someone that could take them for a few hours so that you could go out and spend some time child free? If there are other stay at home moms in your area, I would recommend getting together with them a few times a week. The children can all have a play date together and the moms can have some time to relax and indulge in a little adult conversation. Just remember, staying at home to be with your children is the best thing that you could do for them. And you shouldn't feel guilty for needing some time out now and then. Good luck!!

I'm a stay at home mom also, my children are 13, 9, 3, & 2. The two older ones go to school during the day, hubby goes to work, so by 8 a.m. it just me and the girls. Most days things run smoothly, and I can occupy them pretty well, but I do have days when they annoy the everlasting hell out of me, and no one can understand when they get home that I need a break, just an hour, to recoop and do something for me....I long for a nice Calgon bath!!! LOL. Your children are the same age, and mine do the same things....and when you are with them everyday....and play with them (I'm sick of playing dollies and kitchen and Elmo by the way!!) it's like your on this time schedule to get other things done, laundry,dishes, cooking, and getting things prepared for the next day, etc., and I feel pressured to get them done, then mad at myself if I cant, and I think thats some of my frustration. I made a stand a few months of ago, I told my husband and two older children, that when they get home, after dinner, I need a break, (sometimes before dinner because I get a little frazzled), and I try to find an interesting outlet...it's usually hopping on this computer and logging into Mylot, but it's my time with no kids to take care of for the moment, and it helps. I'd like to be able to go once a week and get together with some other frazzled mothers who feel the same way. I love my kids dearly and love staying home with them, but I'm entitled to a break every now and again, and I think that's what you need. Try to take a break and do nothing or something that you enjoy if you can when they take a nap (mine dont take regular naps everyday, I try, but it's not always successful) or if your situation is like mine, when someone else comes home. It's important to take time for yourself....even if it's a small amount, give you something to look forward to and puts you in a better frame of mind. NO you are NOT a bad mother, it's not easy staying home day in and day out, and the only thing you have to look forward to is going to the grocery store, and that for me is usually with a couple of kids, so no outlet there! Try walking away from them when you feel annoyed (easier said then done I know, mine follow me everywhere!!, heck I cant even go to the bathroom alone LOL!!) thats what I do and sit down, and just try to tune them out for a few minutes, take a deeeeeeep breath, count to ten, rub your temples, and get a favorite drink.....just some suggestions, but dont beat yourself up....look at your situation....kids are a handful, and trying to keep them occupied, when they have a short attention span is difficult. Give yourself a break my dear, and pat yourself on the back for all the good things you are doing, and the benefits that are being provided to them by you staying at home with them!

Sounds to me like maybe you just need a day or two off! See if someone you trust can watch the kids for a while and just have a girls day out. You might be surprised to find that taking time for yourself really makes you more ready to deal with everyone else!

It sounds like you just need to take a break and do something for yourself. I would suggest that you take a night out on the town, get a babysitter and you go out and do something fun. It sounds like your mental capasity is at it's breaking point, that does not make you a bad parent just human. Go out and have some fun!!

Your children are getting on your nerves for two reasons, just going by what you have said here. There is no reason to make getting out of the bath tub a fun event. You are working way too hard at the necessary progression of bath time. Change things like this to directives that are to be obeyed. You will be doing yourself and your children a favor by not teaching them that everything has to be their own idea or sound fun. It is unresonable. Next, hand signals? Grabbing you by your hand? Start teaching him one word questions or 2 word phrases that don't involve physical contact. Having him physically guide you menas he is ehter pulling or pushing you. Your nervous system will get a bit worn from the contact and no matter how gently a child pulls, its still a pull. There is nothing wrong with raising your voice, you must look at the underlying reasons and rearrange things so that they don't stack up. You haven't mentioned what sort of adult contact you get on a daily basis, but it sounds like it is time for you to incorporate that sort of time on a daily basis, and its time that the children started developing a sense that you are definitely a separate person, and THE ADULT.

If you find your self losing your temper then you definately do need a break,

Children are smart, so I recommend talking to them. Especially your eldest daughter. Let her know that you have other things to do, and you cannot be called on 24/7 while you are doing other things. To help keep them occupied, try the start and walk tip. Start them both on an activity, something interesting. Introduce it to them, start playing with them and tell them that you have to do a few things but to stay and finishing they activity. Get up and do what you want, even if it's just taking a few moments to yourself. After a few minutes, go check on the kids to see what they're doing. That should help you get a bit more time to yourself.

No, you don't sound like a bad mother...you sound like a normal mother. I agree with what others are saying about needing a break, I know it's hard, I'm the mother of 4 myself.(their ages are 21, 18, 18 (my step daughter), and 8) ans I've been a stay at home mom for 9 years. I know it's hard to get time away, and I never had a babysitter unless my mom or mother in law could do it...I'm too over protective too. Maybe something as simple as a bubble bath after the kiddies go to bed would help ease some of your stress, I used to do this when my first two were little. Also, don't feel bad about losing it, we all do it from time to time...as long as you love your children and they know it, hugs work for them; they won't even remember the times you dragged them from the tub. Also try taking a deep breath and counting to 10 slowly if you feel like you're losing it, you can even turn the tables and when you're about to lose it, tell the children that mommy needs a hug, that will stop them from what they're doing and you'll have a moment to calm down too. (plus you'll both feel loved for it). I hope this helps and just remember that you're not alone, you have all of us to support you.

No your not a bad mother, you just need time for you too. I cant imagine how hard it must be for you staying at home day in day out, your a mother you love your children but that doesnt mean you shouldnt have a little time just to your self, every one needs and deserves that break.

all problems come from your inside, and if that make you not like a really mother for your child his come from yourself and for that medicine is only to be calm and be in effect usual like the others mothers

Oh I so know the feeling. Believe me I do. You need some adult time, which I'm sure most have told you. However I know it's also easier said then done. Finding a sitter or finding someone who can watch the kids while you go out and even then what do you do? Check for yahoo groups that are for your area, you can do a search by your county and state and I think city but I'm not sure if by city. There may be several groups for stay at home moms. I know there are for my area. Some do set up things for play dates where you can talk with other mothers and the kids can all play together. THis gives you a bit of human contact that can talk with you unlike your children. You might also be able to find reliable baby sitters through there and friends to do things with. When you are ready to change your name from "Mom" to something else and all you want to do is scream the best thing you can do is take some time away from the kids. You'll be doing them and you a favor.

It sounds like you need a break. I don't know why most of society doesn't get that SAHM's need a break from their job just like everyone else. How would they feel if they were expected to be at work 24/7 and didn't even get the peace of a 30 minute lunch break away from all responsibilities? Look into a day care that would let you have at least one morning off a week or if that isn't financially possible, maybe another mom friend who could trade a partial day off with you. Best of luck! It might not feel like it right now but you are doing a wonderful thing for your children by being home to raise them. Now do something equally wonderful and take care of their mama. :)

Im a mother too and I can perfectly understand your feelings. I loose my temper too with my son, like you, I also scream and shout at him to the extent of spanking him on the butt. But that doesn't make us a bad parent right? Quite guilty, but them, sometimes i think children have to see that what they do makes us mad. Although children moods swings are as terrible as you could not expect, we should also try to control our temper. I guess, we just have to be patient and persistent.

You need a break badly. If you can't get out of the house, lock yourself in the bathroom, run a bubble bath, light some candles, turn on the radio, and try to ignore everyone beating on the door trying to get your attention.

i understand that dealing with kid is very hard. but at the moment i think you are not in the good mood or maybe something relly bother you at this moment so it either directly or indiretly effect on what you doing normally. i think it is better for you to have a break and maybe ask your mum or one of your family to look after for your kids for a while. becase if you are not in good mood and keep angry with your kid then it wil effect on your relationship with them, what i mean is they scare at you and it not good for them in the future because normally the love the parent and the kid love is uncondicitonal love. ok good luck for everything and hope you can fix this problem soon