HELP!!
By neztin
@neztin (476)
Singapore
October 6, 2006 5:58am CST
i need help. my friend suddenly told to us that she is getting married to a guy that is old enough to become her father. it's so sudden that it leaves us shock and a question marks. we know that she mentioned about this guy before, that this old man is fall in love with her, but she rejected him. and now suddenly she says that she wants to get married?? sounds so ridiculous right.
moreover she's in the midst of exam. next month we will be sitting for our national exam, and get graduated after that. but she's insisting of getting married and quite school before taking the exam. this really doesnt sound like her at all. even her parents has diapproved with her marriage, but she's insisted and threatened her parents that she will commit suicide if they dont allow her to get married. so her parents also have no choice but to agree with the marriage.
and my friend has been acting weirdly this days. she becomes so harsh to us, she's no longer eat her favourite food when we offer ones. we always caught her day dreaming, staring at nowhere.
my friend is very beautiful and lots of guys fall for her. so im really scared that this old man is trying all means to win her heart, even by using black magic. im just assuming. i really hope it's not happen this way. but all this series of things, just make me wonder. and i really want what should i do to help my friend.
3 responses
@pina_land (250)
• Singapore
27 Oct 06
hmm...??? you are a caring friend...If you are her best friend, you should try to know what is her real problem and try to be with her whenever possible. At first, she may be feeling shameful or afraid to share her sorrow with you. But as you spend time with you, she may be more open with you..you know what i mean?? hehe...then, after you have gained her trust, you can give her your advice.
@ossie16d (11821)
• Australia
8 Oct 06
All you can do is support her if she doesn't want to talk about the matter. Perhaps she now thinks that marriage is a better option than completing her education.
@ilse72 (1450)
• United States
8 Oct 06
This part of your post really worries me: "and my friend has been acting weirdly this days. she becomes so harsh to us, she's no longer eat her favourite food when we offer ones. we always caught her day dreaming, staring at nowhere."
This tells me that all is not right with your friend. Could it be that she is being co-erced into marriage by him or that she is pregnant?
I wonder if her parents could entice her to go to the doctor for a complete check up. Maybe they can tell her it is a pre-marital exam. She needs to have a complete check up so the doctor can find out if there is a physical problem (pregnancy) or an emotional problem. Something is definitely wrong here and, if she won't confide in friends, maybe she will let something slip to the doctor.
For now, just continue being her friend. Be there for her. When the two of you are alone, tell her that you love her as a friend and that, if she ever wants to confide in you, you will listen. Other than that, there isn't much you can do. Do not nag or badger her as it will cause her to pull away from you and maybe even end the friendship. Either encourage her to see a doctor for a physical or talk to her parents and see if they can do so. I think it is an avenue worth pursuing.
Please let us know how things turn out. (I'm an R.N.)
