My son, ADD and medication

Your son has a chemical imbalance. If he was diabetic would you give him insulin? ADD is the same, he has a deficiency that causes some minor problems. By medicating him you are helping his self esteem, as he does better in school and with relationships. As a mother you are doing something right, not something wrong, there is nothing to feel guilty about. Here is an interesting fact that may help you feel better...ADD is usually passed on by the Fathers genes, so just blame his Daddy. LOL My son and husband are both ADD. My husband at 34 still takes medication. My son is not currently on medicine, because we choose to homeschool instead. However he is getting to the point that I can no longer avoid medication... HTH Crystal

I have two children on medication for ADHD. And I tried too to keep them off of medication. But they were not able to progress in school, so I gave in. I hate having to give them a pill everyday and them feel as if they rely on this everyday pill. But the way I see it, they would be worse off if I did not provide this everyday pill. They would be lacking seld esteem because they would have grades that would keep them back. And when a child is held too far back behind their peers, it hits their self worth and they end up not liking school. I even had to take a loan out for my son to get him caught up in school by taking him to Sylvan. It was very costly. But he was also put on meds and it made a huge difference! In Feb the teacher said that he was too far behind to pass the grade. 12 weeks later and on medication, the teacher had to call me in to ask what happened to change his outlook. Well, it it was a lot of money spent and still is to upkeep the medication and doctor visits. But it sure it worth it! They are both passing with flying colors! :)

I believe I have ADD too and so does my doctor. Since I'm not working now I don't worry about it as much but if I am taking medication for it there is a world of difference in my ability to think. I know how he feels not being able to think or concentrate. It's not your fault. It is often hereditary though. Is there someone in your family with it? There are also new things coming out all the time for treatment. He may not always need meds. I have been hearing a lot about karate being helpful. Meditation helps me. Also I have heard that it is sometimes caused by a visual problem and vision therapy helps.

Your Doctors did tell you in most cases children do grow out of ADD didn't they? In time, he can learn how to adapt and concentrate on his own. That is what my daughter's Doctor told me. Even if he needs them for a long time, they are helping him, not hurting him. We all have things that are different, there is nothing wrong with that. Secondly didn't your Doctor tell you also they don't know what causes ADD? There are no certain links that fit to be able to say it's this or that other than it just happens. It's just how the brain is. Children with this are most likely stronger in other areas than most children. My daughter is a quick thinker. She can come back with a clever remark in a second. But she can't set in class and concentrate long enough to receive information needed with out her meds.

My son has adhd. I agree it is over diagnosed but my son does need the meds. We went through a very similar situation except the teacher my son had after 1 week got so frustrated with him that she sat him in the corner with a crayon and told me she didn't have time to deal with him she had a class to teach and that she just let him draw and do what he wanted to do. By the second week we had a teachers conference with the principal where they said they had evaluated him and said it might be possible he can't learn and he needs special ed. My son struggled and had major behavior issues. It really upset me what they said about him not being able to learn. I pulled him out of public school and placed him in private school it is very expensive and really had put us in a financial bind. However, the teachers at the private school were wonderful they tried everything to work with Ryan and they give him tons of one on one attention. The teacher told me he could never concentrate over 2 minutes. She recommended a dr and the dr did lots of test and said that my son definetely has adhd. She put him on meds and it is like day and night. Before he could not be left in a room for even a few minutes by himself. He would destroy the room. He could not get through his abc's. After the meds he learned his abc's in no time and their sounds. I am now working a part time job and he is attending private school and he is also taking mandrin chinese classes. He is learning so fast now that he is on the meds and is so well behaved He went from not being able to get through his abc's even with people working with him daily and not being able to count to 10 to in less than a year he is doing well in all classes can count to 30 in chinese and is learning the pinyin and can actually form sentences in the a very hard language to learn. It is a total difference. My son will actually sit down and have a conversation with me before he just said words. He desperately needed the meds. I know it bothers you he is dependent but it sounds like your son like mine really needs the meds. I think you just need to look at it like you would any other medical need. Some people need meds to help their heart function properly some people need meds to be able to focus. It has made a world of difference for my son and our whole family. You didn't do anything wrong. I have been put down by many people because I give him Concerta but he needs it and I know he does. The meds are what is best for your son. It is nothing to be ashamed of. My husband is a consultant for a fortune 500 company one of the men he works with has adhd. He takes the same meds as my son. If your son had a different medical condition would you feel bad? If he had a heart condition or asthma or something like that and you had to give him a pill each day? It is nothing to feel bad about. I'm sure he is a great kid. My son is a great person. But the fact is if you take him off his meds the house will be torn apart and it is like turning a light bulb off he can't focus. I also have a cousin that took ritalin for years since elementary. He just finished college and is now a teacher. He had to take the meds all through college. Don't be upset be thankful you found what your son needed and that it is working so wonderfully for him.

I have been struggling with this decisions too. No one have ever suggested to me that my son (8 yrs old) has ADD or ADHD, but I always think about it. Right now, he does very well academically. His reading level is way beyond his classmates. He catches on to new lessons fairly easily. But I often wonder if that is only because I work with him at home. His behavior, on the other hand, is questionable. He does lots of distracting things, gets mad easily and daydreams a LOT. When we go through stressful homework sessions (on a constant basis), I wonder if he is really struggling with something and not telling me. I am scared to have him tested for fear of labelling him unfairly. I would not want him to be on meds, but I also think I'm wrong for not looking into it as a possibility. Sorry I could not give you solid advice, but I wanted to let you know that I am also concerned about this too.

I as well had a very difficult time putting my child on medication. This was actually done in Kindergarten and he is now in 7th grade. His school has been borderline until this year, he is actually on the Honor Roll. It was not so much the hyperactivity as it was the impulsiveness and inattention. The medication has actually helped him immensily, even though there are other issues that we have to deal with. I hope that he continues to do well in school and continues to develop socially and not do stupid things that we all know are wrong, but sometimes they make decisions that are not the best.

I understand your battles with the schools and teachers. My step son was put on medication without his father's permission because the teacher pushed the mother into believing he needed it. He did not. His grades were good, he is in the GAIT program (for gifted students) in school. His teacher couldn't handle any student who didn't sit like a statue in their seat for hours on end. You were right to question it when it was first suggested for him and to resist. There ARE times when medication is needed for some kids and since your child was having trouble with his schoolwork and you have now seen an improvement, it is good that he is now on the medication. It is also good that you didn't give in until he actually needed them. Don't feel guilty. You did nothing wrong to cause this and by giving him medication right now when he seems to need it, you are also giving him the chance to learn and do well in school.

My son was ADD, thats what they said so he was on 4 differnt med he lost so much weight it was awful , I kept him home most of the time and they schooled him at home , when got to the 7th he decided he was doing better and wanted off the med , I took him off of them he went back to school,but now with him older he has health problems from the meds he took I don't they were tested enough to see what would happen years down the road.

Sometimes meds are needed. Don't blame yourself. I am a special education teacher, I have seen meds work and I know that sometimes they don't. If it's working for you son, be glad. It's better than the stigma of being the hyper kid that's always in trouble and isn't good in school. I'd look at alternative strategies to have him practice and maybe at some point he won't needv the meds.

Whatever the outcome of this.......DO NOT USE A PILL CALLED CONCERTA. Way too many high risks, and way too many stories. Example: My little brother was on concerta for 2 years. It has stunted his growth and he had developed a small twitch in his eye. We finally took him off of it and it took weeks to get him to stop the twitch. Other stories from PEOPLE I KNOW, extreme weight gain, over-tiredness, increased anger breakdowns, etc. BEWARE OF CONCERTA

My son as well is on medication for ADHD. Like you, I resisted medicating him for a couple of years - until the school told me he was falling behind his classmates academically and was also having trouble socially due to his impulsiveness. My son is 9 years old, fantastic at sports (wins everything) naturally very thin, and is always on the go - he is also a great artist and has been since he was 2 years old, when the day care centre carer told me he could not believe that a child that age could draw a recognisable picture of a person, including fingers & toes - and wouldn't have believed it if he hadn't seen it himself. I know my child has lots of special qualities, but without the medication, he would not be able to sit still long enough to actually get anything done, including his school work. So i medicate him, even though I don't like it. To those that say you would medicate your child for asthma, or for diabetes, to you I say this is SO different. This medication acts on the BRAIN - when i see it take effect on my son, I don't like what I see. When he takes his medication he becomes so focused it's almost obsessive - what 9 year old do you know that will sit for 3 hrs doing a drawing - not even eating or drinking...? THAT is not normal either, although it keeps the school happy. I figure that the SCHOOLS and EDUCATION SYSTEM are responsible for a lot of the kids on meds, because they like the kids to be medicated so they can control them - so they 'fit in the box' of what they think children should be. it makes life easier for them. now they aren't allowed to hit kids, it means they have to 'think' behaviour management, not punishment, and that is TOO HARD for them. so meds are the answer, and schools pressure people into getting their kids medicated. i remember the first time the school tried to get me to mediate my child as a 5 y/o. i was asked to a meeting with the principal - and i went along. what i wasn't told was that the teacher, the principal and the guidance officer were going to be at the meeting, and that they had it in their heads that i would do what they said and go to a doc & get a prescription. I am a degree qualified welfare worker myself, and wasn't easily intimidated, knew my stuff, and argued with them in an educated fashion - but all the while i was thinking, what if I didn't know what I know? what if I wasn't confident enough to argue with them...? it was a deliberate set up, but they didn't get what they were planning. it was another 2 years before i medicated, and my son was under paediatric care and the dr was in agreeance with me. until his school work began to suffer - then we went with the meds. good luck with everything - and don't blame yourself - it was nothing you did wrong.

I also have a 10 year old son that needs to be on medication everyday. He has Provasive Developement Disorder. Almost like autism. It can be hard for me sometimes. But i'm getting through this one day at a time.

My 16 year old son has ADD and my 9 year old daughter has ADHD. They're homeschooled, so they don't struggle in school anymore, but they both prefer to take Concerta, because they say they have extreme brainfog without it. Plus, my daughter says whatever comes into her mind and doesn't get along with other kids as well without the Concerta. She's aware of this and doesn't want to stop the medication. We held off on medicating my son until he was almost eight and I wish we'd started sooner and so does he. They're both much happier and have more self esteem with the Concerta, because they can think better and aren't so restless all the time. And they both still daydream to a normal extent and are very artistic, so it hasn't taken away their creativity or imagination. I think school is a big problem for kids with ADHD, and that many of them aren't ready to learn what educators say they should be learning. Many of them just neeed more time to play and develop than they're allowed to have nowadays.

Dont feel bad you did absoutley nothing wrong. MY best friend has a son who also needs meds to help him calm down for the same reasons. I have seen him when he is on his meds and when he is off and it is a drastic change. The main point is that he can get through school and concentrate on what he is doing and not other things. He will be better off later in life as well if he is on meds because he will be able to get a REAL job that he will be able to concentrate on and not get easily distracted.

Dont feel like you did anything wrong, my son has adhd and yes i have him on meds. I believe that my child needs it. Yes tehre are many docs out there that just put children on the meds when they really dont need them. This is areal condition and yes I think some children need the medicine. THere is a chemical imbalance in their system and having the meds help the children that truly need it. So dont ever feel like you did something wrong because you did not.

well i have responded to many of these add discussions as my son had adhd. he is now almost 15. i have taken him off the meds. the only thing i tell people is that he was always 80 lbs. very small. he was on meds since kindergarten as for the same reasons, school. i decided last year to take him off meds (my decision) and sad to say he is 190 lbs. he grew 4 inches and gained 100 lbs. his body is covered with stretch marks. very sad. i have tried every known vitamin, diet, all natural doctors. nothing worked. i didn't even like the meds, made him act weird. i can always tell when a child is on meds now. they have that look in their eyes. many moms now i talk to whose children are on meds are like 80 lbs. i would just watch your childs weight. i think this is a serious side effect - the growth of your child. did the meds work? maybe for school. that is the only reason i put him on it. i have come to realize that our whole family is very energentic, artistic, very musical and we are what make the world go round. good luck. it is a long road.

very similar with my friend's kid, same age. He got better with the pill, but still can't do everything teachers want.

First off, let me start out by saying my two boys were asked by the school to be put on medication. I, like you, am against medical interference unless we REALLY need it, you know? In the years past, I have put my oldest son (who's now 11) on Concerta & then switched to Aderall XL due to his complaining of a stomach or headache. I don't know what about these kids makes their heads hurt, but my son continually complains of a headache, also! He is very stressed out all the time & also "works up" people around him. Ok, here's what I was going to tell you...When I put him on meds in the past, & he'd complain of headaches/stomaches, I took him off of the Concerta &...boy, were we in for it!!!!!!! It kinda reminds me of what people say they go thru when cutting cold turkey from Prozac - - I kid you not!!! Whereas before he would tease or hit his sister, now he would become violent with her, in a scary way. (My son is NOT bent towards being mean, just irritable at certain times.) Same when I took him off of Aderall XL. He has never gone back on those things. It does sound like they are *really* helping your son to cope, though, & they say that as he grows older the need for it sometimes decreases. (There IS adult ADD, though, even though we've been told there isn't. My husband has the same symptoms.) But I mean that I've heard that as they get older & they have learned what "normal" is, & how to contain their emotions, do good work, etc the need decreases. Best of luck to you! Oh, P.S. I home school my son now & THAT has made ALL the difference for him...our schedules are flexible & I can work personally with him in his shortcomings! I'd like to shout it from the rooftops how much I can see him improving & being happier!

Hi, i have a nephew in the same sisuation as this, his mother went as long as she possibaly could without giving him pills,but there just is really no option for this rare illness