marriage

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Can someone tell me what the big deal with marriage is? why is the guy always help reponsible for proposing and getting the ring? If women have become so independent and modern, why don't they start proposing and getting the ring or even paying for the wedding? Where is that book of the rules that we have to get married. Is is truly done for love or tax cuts? And if it done because of being in love with someone, why do 50% of marriages end in divorce?