Married Life out of bounds

I am so sorry. This does not sound good at all. Can you leave a husband in the Phillipines? Is he the father of your children? If you can possibly leave, I think you should. As to why he isn't content with you, you may need a psychologist to answer that question. Many men seem to have the same problem but it doesn't make it right. I suspect that he is content with you but not with himself. He may think he needs to have someone tell him he is attractive. Would it help if you were extra nice to him and compliment him? My gut tells me though that you may have to leave. If he hits you again, you definitely should leave. Try not to be too angry. Angry enough to do something about the situation but not so angry that you make yourself sick. I don't have a lot of time to spend at mylot but I will request to be your friend and hopefully can talk to you some. Hugs

i'm sorry for you, do you ever heard of "enough is enough"? dont u feel that u had enough of that? seems to me that ur husband have a bad habit on women and i think he cant change.he keep doing that becoz he knew that in the end u would forgive him again and again.since u already support ur family expenses then why dont u leave him? u have to decide a good choice for u and ur kids.i think u will survive by being alone, and one day you''ll find someone who lots better then him.make a choice becoz life is to choose.

Marriage is stupid, you pay for a wedding and a piece of paper and then you find out that the jerk might be cheating on you, you file divorce papers, and then you think to yourself,"What the hell was I thinking getting married to begin with?"

What can I say about your's husband as he is doing every thing which a husband should not do and worst of all he is getting away with i,t as he thinks, because he is a jerk as well insenstive. Now come to your's questions first one is,"why he is doing this to me?" he is doing because he has already sensed your's insecurity regarding a broken family and marriage. your's second question is"why he isnt contended with me and with what he has?" He is a some one who is a compulsive non one woman man and for him it dosent matter if his wife is straight out from cover pages of Vogue, for him its the satisfaction of his misplaced manly ego of being with too many women. Such men dont live in reality, they are loosers and they want to escape from that reality and what better way than living in illusions when there is some one called a wife in home who can take all the challanges of the house and family and there is no fear of ever she getting out of this situation. I am sorry the way life has put you and frankly I dont see much hope in him unless he is threatend with the very existense of you. You are angry I can understand and you need for a talk is also understandable to maintain your's own sanity.

I've been in your shoes, so please do not take anything I am about to say to offense. The reason he keeps doing these things is because you keep forgiving him. I know, I was once there. I'm not saying you are to blame for his actions. But as long as you keep forgiving him, he's going to continue acting this way and doing the things he does. There are better men out there. Ones who will love you and treat you as you deserve to be treated. The only way you are going to stop his behavior is to stop forgiving him and boot him out. Basicly you are letting him get away with it. It's like having a dog that chews things up. If you don't do something about it, the dog will think its ok and continue to chew things up. By you forgiving him everytime, tells him that you aren't going to do anything about it. Like I said earlier, I'm not saying you are to blame. All I'm saying is you are going to have to put a stop to it by not forgiving him.

If you really do not want to leave, and you think you have no where to go, then stay. Make his life as miserable as he is making yours. I have seen this situation where the husband constantly takes everything for granted and does not respect his wife anymore. You say he won't work, and you are paying for everything. Are you paying for the internet? Have it cut off, sell the computer and put an end to that. If you pay for everything, make him do without the things you provide for him. If he begins to cheat on you again, start sleeping in another room. Do not cook for him, or wash his clothes. Do nothing for him. When he wants to know why you stopped doing all the things you have done before, just tell him "You quit being a good husband to me, I quit being a good wife to you." I am sorry if this sounds hardcore, but he is your husband and the father of your children and he needs to do his job. I think if he learns you are not going to bow down and take all the abuse, he may stop. Do not show him your anger, show him your strength. I can tell you are strong, because you are taking care of your family without his help. Show him you do not need him. Ignore him, and everything he does. Teach him a lesson he should have learned a long time ago. Try this for a while. If that does not work, cash out his paypal account and leave. You can handle it, you do have it in you. Good luck in what ever you do. I pray that things begin to get better for you.

Sounds like you just need to kick him out of the house. He has gone behind your back and cheated, and has done other horrible things to you and allows you to kill yourself supporting his lazy butt! You should have kicked him out a long time ago. Empower yourself and tell him that you don't need him and make him leave, call the police if you have to! Go get a divorce and start your life with you and your kids and hope that they don't end up in the same situation someday.

i feel sorry for you girl.. why not leave your hubby. let him take care of the kids. pay for all the bills. try to let him realize that he is married already and should not do those things that single person are doing. he must be responsible enough to take care of his family. just explain to the kids whats the real story. explain to them that you are hurt with what their dad is doing. try to have a vacation of your own in order for you to think of the situation. or maybe you can consult a marriage counselor.. just give it a try..

Please don't get angry with me, but you are mad at the wrong person. You need to stop and be mad at yourself because you are blaming yourself by thinking something is wrong with you. Also, you should be angry with yourself for putting up with all of his nonsense. You know that you deserve more respect, love, and consideration than that. You are married and have kids - so you should try to keep your marriage together. But you know it takes two. If you are going to stay in this marriage, you must sit him down and you both discuss rules, feelings, boundries, or whatever you want to term it. It should not be that you are working all those hours and you have to come home to a messy house. Between him and the children, they all can pick up after themselve, and each person given a chore to do. This way you will not be overwhelm. Again, I will say you should not be doing everything. Your husband needs to step up to the plate and work with the kids in order to make your life easier as well as theirs. Matter of fact they should cook dinner so you will have something to eat when you get home. It is not asking to much for everyone in the family to do their part. If you did not start them out that way - it is ok you can start now. Maybe they will be upset because they feel like you have been doing it, but you have to let them know that you can't not live like that anymore It is killing you. If you don't put a stop to all of this you will be unhappy, miserable, depressed, etc... Now to him not working, hitting you, cheating and on and on. He has to go get a job and get off the internet. He could be using that time to find a job through the internet. It is no one that he should ever put his hands on you or even cheat. Stop thinking it is because something is wrong with you. You know how nice you look, and you are good wife and mother. Enough is enough you have forgiven and forgiven. So you have done the best you can do. But your man needs to be the one doing his part. If you are going to stay in this situation - make some changes and have family make changes. He is not being a real man if he just keeps letting you do everything. You deserve to be happy, to be respected, and loved. Think about it.....blessings to you and your family

You are not doing anything wrong I can tell you that . Please don't take this the wrong way but he needs to get his act together . I know this is easier said then done but you should probably let him know that you will not be with him forever if he continues his behaviour . By what you said I think you love him very much but it doesn't sound like his feelings are as strong as yours . You could make it on your own as you are the one working and paying for everything now and you would meet someone who would treat you a whole lot better . It may take you some time to come to this decision but I think everyone has their limits and you have been putting up a lot with him . He knows he can get away with this because his behaviour in the past has shown that . You forgave him before and he thinks he can have his cake and eat it too , as they say . You just need to know that you didn't DO ANYTHING wrong . It is him that will lose out in the end because if you leave him he will realize too late his mistakes and at this time it will be his loss and not yours . By the way if that is a picture of your children they are adorable .

I think it is very unfair that your husband gets to play games all the time (doesnt matter whether he is earning the money or not) and not help you do the household stuff while you are working full time too .. Maybe you can talk to your husband nicely and of course not without getting angry or shouting at him.. Make him understand that you love him very much... but please dont talk as if he desires other woman.. Also, maybe he is behaving like this, because he feels that he didnt get enough attention from you.. i know you are busy and everything.. but your marriage is important .. maybe make some time that you guys can spend together.. go on a date or something.. just have fun .. of course without the kids.. hopefully it will bring some sparks back into your relationship.. start paying more attention to him (even though you may feel that he doesnt deserve it) and start showing love more expressively to him. Dress sexily and prettily for him to remind him that you are a beautiful woman that he shouldnt take you for granted. Make him remember you as that girl he fell for when you guys married.

with my opinion u v to leave ur husband.. coz u r very smart so spend ur life with a special choose a good person 4 ur life ok if u need any advice add me in ur frnd list

Honestly it sounds like he has some issues that have nothing to do with you. It is called immaturity! First of all, gambling online does not count as "working." Not for a regular Joe. If he were bringing in thousands of dollars, maybe. Is there a reason that he won't go get a job? Or is he feeling guilty? My personal choice would be that if I have to do it all on my own anyhow, and he isn't doing anything but causing me pain and stress, I would be better off without him. But it has to be your DECISION. And you have to make it. If you have children, you also have them to think about... I guess the question becomes "what IS he GIVING to the relationship?"

Honey you need to wake up! Why isn't he content with you? Why are you content with him is the question I would be asking myself. Are you kiddin me? Givin this guy a free ride, he doesn't even lift a finger to help you? You are a model? Young? Girl you could do so much better and he needs to know it!! Tell him to get off his a** and help you support those kids. And personally I think you SHOULD be mad. Let him know that you will not tolerate his actions (or lack there of) anymore. And you say he has changed? Changed what? His underware? Thank god for that! Ha. But seriously you sound like a cool girl with a good attitude about things. And I'm so glad he doesn't hurt you anymore... atleast physically that is. I know he's "daddy" but a marriage is supposed to be a partnership. What kind of partner is he if he leaves you to take care of everything?! He would be nothing without you... a bumb on the street! Ha... I truly hope you figure this one out hun. I just think you need to talk to him tell him you've had enough and he better get his butt in gear or don't let the door hit it on the way out! Hope I helped a little. This is just my opinion on things. I hope it all works out for ya.

Hmmm well ur husband just eating and sleeping dont mind please..and not working its not fair that wife doing alot of work and husband not doing yukk..Well i saw you in pic i think in black glasses there is you .. well not bad looking good sexy...i dont know why ur husband doing that with you just do one..well become sexi and make your husband away from another galzz at night what i m trying to say u can understand...well try to say him at night during . s.e.x that do some thing like job as well find some job...if he will not get it then...GOD BLESS YOU Girl...Have a nice day !

I went through most of the same things with my husband. I have been through periods of time that he did not work but I never caught him chatting with women. He is not much of a computer person. He is working today (praise God) and has been on this job for almost a year which is definitely a record for him. There were many days that I felt like you, like I was going crazy and couldn't cope. So I do understand how you feel. If your husband is like mine he will continue to do these things until you take action. You have to make up your mind what you want in life. Do you want a life with him? Do you want a life without him? This is the first thing that must be decided. My only advice to you is what has worked for me. If you want to stay with him you have to start doing some things different. Prayer is what has changed my life. I have also learned some things taught in the Bible and put them into practice. My marriage is better because of it. It's not perfect yet but I'm still praying. I'm not giving up. The Bible tells us that the enemy (the devil) comes to kill, steal and destroy. You have to kick Satan out of your home and your life. You can't let him have any place in your life. In the book of Genesis God created everything by His spoken words. Did you know that you can change your life by changing the things you say?God bless.

your "husband" is doing this because you let him. you keep trying to mske it sll ok. when in sll sctuality it is far from ok and you are far from happy. your children can't be happy and they should be your first priority. boobs and butts are nothing, someone who smiles in the morning eeven eith your moring hair and breath, who does the housework because they see it needs done and you are working, or someone to just rub your feet is what you need. you are better than just a maid or a paycheck. look in jthe mirrio and realize you are a good mother, a hard working person, a caring person and have a sense of knowing what is wrong and right...and you know this is wrong.

your "husband" is doing this because you let him. you keep trying to make it all ok. when in all actuality it is far from ok and you are far from happy. your children can't be happy and they should be your first priority. boobs and butts are nothing, someone who smiles in the morning eeven eith your moring hair and breath, who does the housework because they see it needs done and you are working, or someone to just rub your feet is what you need. you are better than just a maid or a paycheck. look in jthe mirrio and realize you are a good mother, a hard working person, a caring person and have a sense of knowing what is wrong and right...and you know this is wrong.

You're in a very difficult situation indeed wow! i guess you really need to have some space for now. i guess its okay to do those things you do for your husband for as long as he could share something in the relationship like the simple tasks of maintaining the house the least. I just wish you could convince him to become more responsible. Else i would avice what others are saying in here. Separation maybe the only thing that could maybe give you some peace of mind and less stress. It is much more preferable to spend more of your time to your children than spend it with your husband who as you were saying constantly cheating on you.

Leave him...that is all I can say. You still have a support group around you plus it will be one less mouth to fed when your husband will be out of your life. Your children will understand because your husband is not making a good example. A husband is the provider not a free rider. If your children are already at the right age, then soon they will be able to help you. Don't make your life miserable because the stress might catch up on you and you have 5 kids to think about.