i dont think my wife will cope with a disabled child.
By webster76
@webster76 (152)
January 25, 2007 8:09pm CST
I was told by the doctor today that my 7 month old daughter may be 'mentally disabled', I am not afraid of the possibliity that she is, but more how it will affect my wife.
I know that I am capable of getting through this as I have had my suspicions for a while but I didnt mention it to my wife because I suppose in the back of my mind I was hoping I was wrong.
As i am writing this my daughter is sat next to me having just had her latest feed, she is laughing and were talking to eacher other and I must honestly say that since hearing what the doctor had to say I have not felt any difference in my feelings towards her or tried to treat her differently.
If it turns out that she is mentally impaired I think my hardest challenge will be keeping my wife's fears in perspective. I would particularly like comments from people who are or have been in a similar situation.
1 person likes this
2 responses
@ktroth (378)
• United States
26 Jan 07
My husband and I are good friends with a couple who have an autistic son. When they got the diagnosis initially they were shocked and wondered how they would cope with it. Now, five years later, they view this child as a true blessing from God. They feel they have become much more patient and understanding because of him. And, also because of him, they have found joy in the smallest victories.
I am a firm believer that God never gives us more than we can handle. He may push it to the extreme limits, but he knows how much we can take. And it's amazing how resilient people are and how strong they suddenly become in the face of a tough situation. Your wife will be just fine. Yes there will be difficult times. She may not think she can handle this. But love is a very powerful thing, especially the love of a parent. She's probably going to be a lot stronger than you may think. And it sounds like she has a great partner!
2 people like this
@webster76 (152)
•
26 Jan 07
Thanks ktroth, my mother has a similar view to you, when my wife was carrying our first son my mother said you will get a boy if your ready for one. At first i wasn't sure what she meant, but raising him prepared us for the 2 girls we also have. I do believe that every day is a school day and you learn as you go.
@trinidadvelasco (11401)
• Philippines
4 Apr 07
The two of you will cope. I am very sure of this. A mother is willing to sacrifice so much for her child. Definitely, once your wife learns of this 'impairment' in your daughter, she will map out plans on how to go about it. She will go deeply about the matter with the doctor. She will note everything that the doctor has to say in her mind and in her heart. I should know, I am a mother, too. And I am coping alone with the illness of my youngest child, he has leukemia, the inborn type. My husband is always away from us and I am coping alone. I have a total of three kids and yet, we are doing well. Your wife, she's got you to help her out, it will not be too difficult coping. It will do much good if you tell her now about this possibility that your youngest child will be having a 'mental impairment.'
