faith
fear
fears
overcoming fear
overcoming worry
positive mental attitude
reality check
worries
worry
Why worry and live in fear?
By danjenkins
@danjenkins (646)
United States
January 26, 2007 7:16am CST
Please name the benefits you find in worrying. And, what is the benefit of being fearful.
Fear and worry are related. And, fear / worry is a form of faith .. negative faith .. it is faith that something bad, harmful, painful, etc., is going to happen. Faith is belief that something good, beneficial, joyful, etc., is going to happen.
Now, make a list of all the things you are afraid of .. how many of them have ever actually happened .. to YOU? And, make a list of all the things you worry about .. how many of those things have actually happened .. to YOU?
Now, how much of your energy has been sapped away worrying and being fearful of things that have never actually happened to you? How many wonderful things have you missed in life because you were paralyzed by worry and fear over things that never materialized?
It is time to stop letting fear and worry be your slavemaster. Face down your fears. End worry by filling your mind with positive things. Have a funeral and BURY Old Man Can't!
Really, please post the reasons why you think your fears and worries are legitimate .. anybody?
Or, share the way you have overcome your fears and worries.
8 people like this
33 responses
@kidstaxi1971 (48)
• United States
28 Jan 07
I understand where you are coming from. But, I know for myself a problem will come up in my life or my childrens life and I think I am not worrying about the situation because I am not thinking about it. But after a couple of days I can tell my subconscious is dealing with it because I start getting physical signs of stress. Such as neck tensions, not being able to remember stuff, hair coming out etc. So how do you change your subconscious?
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
28 Jan 07
In the PMA (positive mental attitude) teachings, those who teach PMA refer to AFFIRMATIONS. These are statements of positive scenarios for your life that you are believing in. For instance, "My children are safe and protected against the evil around them; they are obedient and respectful to other people, and study hard in school". Speaking these types of things out loud when no one is around will cause your sub-conscious to become reoriented and dwell on positive things rather than fearful things.
Among Christians, this is referred to as "speaking the Word of God", and people find Scriptures of hope and faith to speak outloud to themselves which helps our mind to become focused upon what God CAN do, rather than what fearful thing might happen in life.
@inflamation (866)
• Pakistan
28 Jan 07
Yes you are absolutely right. Living in fear and being worried about anything don't make that thing perfect. Its's just a human guts which a person should take support of it and fight for their problems.
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
28 Jan 07
To overcome worry, we change our focus .. we stop listening to the negative things that feed our fear, and look at the good, the lovely, the good reports.
@alchemistrx (2547)
• Philippines
27 Jan 07
I buried all those worries away because it is making me sick.And now I don't to fear because I have someone at my side always.He is JESUS,MY SAVIOR.
1 person likes this
@lotusrose2007 (106)
• India
27 Jan 07
Yes belief towards god is the best way to get rid of fears and depression
1 person likes this
@anne_143god (5387)
• Philippines
27 Jan 07
Sometimes worry helps us to prevent such worries to happen for we already think solutions but sometimes it does not help for it does not give us peace of mind.
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Actually, worry does not take action. If we actively seek solutions to a problem, we stop worrying about it. Worry just mulls the problem over and over, and thinks of all the bad things that can happen.
@parassiniprashob (479)
• India
27 Jan 07
the biggest fear in this world is stage fear, many people fears about their future , gets depression things wanted to do but not able to , i think this is the main reason for depression
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
29 Jan 07
So, we need to develop realistic expectations for our life and work toward attainable goals rather than giving up because we cannot be overnight successes. Fear of failure insures we are failures, if we do not try to overcome our fears.
@niharshukla (31)
• India
27 Jan 07
Don't get worried ... !!
It's easier said than done ...
But, yes we must refrain ourself from situations that can cause fear and worry ..
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
29 Jan 07
If we accept the reality that the human mind cannot think of two things at one time, then we can overcome thinking thoughts of fear and worry by thinking about things that are positive and wonderful.
@pendragon (3349)
• United States
27 Jan 07
I finally don't worry any longer, it ate up a good deal of me, and I have fin ally learned to manage it, and learned to trust myself and defend myself, and how to get along no matter what, so no there is no benefit from worry, it's a weapon against only yourself.
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
28 Jan 07
Excellent insight. Focusing upon fear and worry is indeed a weapon that does more harm to the worrier than it does good for the situation being worried about.
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
26 Jan 07
Excellent. The best way to overcome fears is to face them down, certainly. For those who have deeper levels of irrational fear, it has to be done is small doses.
@ESKARENA1 (18261)
•
26 Jan 07
there are no benefits in worrying, but it is part of the human condition to analyse events and re evaluate them and try to assess each possible outcome to every scinario
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
26 Jan 07
I understand what you are saying. But, can we consider this? It is also part of the human condition to hate, be angry, want to murder someone who hurt us, be rude, etc. We expect people to overcome those things, which are part of the human condition, don't we? So, why can't we improve our lives by overcoming the human condition of fear and worry, if it is keeping us from being all we can be and do all we can do?
@linzmcwilliams (1552)
•
26 Jan 07
My boyfriend always tells me this. I worry all the time. Even about things i have no power to change. I did an English exam the other day and am already worried about the results even though i don't get them till March. It's my boyfriend who stops me worrying. He takes my mind off things and helps me better myself. I'm very lucky.
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
28 Jan 07
There are several things that can encourage fear and worry .. one is the people we hang out .. so, if the people we are around confirm our fears and worries all the times, we need to find positive people to spend time with and help us be positive. Also, watching too much news, listening to disrespectful "music", and other sources of negativity should be reduced and replaced with things which are positive.
@maru_047in (1007)
• India
26 Jan 07
I think in the mind of humans their is always worries or fear which always tells the person be careful and i believe no humans think possitive in their mind he always think it in negetive mind and many times it the fear always lead to success and only in some cases it fails and for me it happens each and every time and i land up in success.
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
29 Jan 07
The human mind is a computer .. garbage in, garbage out .. so, if we have excess fear and worry, we need to change what we are putting into our computer / mind.
@jaizdeep (397)
• India
26 Jan 07
Well i don't worry about many things in life....The best possible way i know to get rid of them is by just following a golden rule..I have been following it throughout my life And it seems to work wonders on even the most nervous of times i rilly wish that l of u try it out
The sentence goes like this"Why worry beacuse if the reason u are worryihng for is solvable and has a solution u dont need to worry because the solution to your problem exists and ull find it some day
And if there is no solution to it then there is no sense worrying because no matter how much ever u might worry the problem cannot be solved so why worry????"
@sbbcackk (99)
• Ecuador
26 Jan 07
I read somewhere that there's absolutely no justification for worrying. Absolutely nothing to gain from it.
If there's a situation when you think you should worry, think about this: What can you do about it?
if you CAN do something, do it instead of worrying... and if there's nothing you can do, there's also nothing to gain by worrying.
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
26 Jan 07
While I agree with you wholeheartedly, in principle, if my wife does not show up when she says she will be home, and I can't get her on her cell phone, I do begin worrying .. car accident? attacked? Of course, that is because my wife is always prompt and let's me know where she is going and approximately when she'll be back. She's a big girl and doesn't need me to bird-dog her, but if she would not come home at the time she said, I'd start worrying about an hour later.
However, obsessing in advance about the "what if's" is a totally useless exersize, waste of time, creator of unnecessary stress and just plain painful .. we can change our thoughts.
@bodkerlo47 (104)
• United States
26 Jan 07
There are no benefits in worrying. Having a little fear is good. It's like a child, they don't know anything about fear and the dangers, but if they did know, they wouldn't do dangerous things because they know the consequences. I am afraid of snakes and spiders. If I didn't fear them and was around them with no care, I could easily be bitten. I have been bitten by a brown recluse spider.
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
29 Jan 07
So long as our fears simply cause us to make good decisions (staying away from spiders, for instance), it is healthy. However, if it paralyzes us from fully functioning in life, we need to find ways to overcome it.
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
29 Jan 07
One principle of overcoming worry is to determine what the worst thing is that can happen, and improve upon that result. Huh? We can find better solutions to situations we worry about. Taking positive action reduces anxiety.
@Desdemona (1301)
• Canada
26 Jan 07
Good discussion!
Truly we need a balance in life. So, yes, having worry and a carefree attitude is good in my humble opinion.
Sure, don't sweat the small stuff, however we all have to let our minds wonder about something.
I think my worry in life is always my health. Though, I try to find a natural balance with it. Kinda like saying to myself, "worry about it at 4pm today and not right now"...that make sense? Really I put the worry off to a more suitable time.
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Ships are built with water tight compartments .. several of them. This way, if a hole is punched in one section, they can slam the doors shut on both sides of that compartment and keep the ship from sinking. We should live our life in compartments .. focusing on one day at a time to keep us from being sunk by stress and anxiety.
@Willowlady (10658)
• United States
26 Jan 07
There are no benefits to worrying. A negative emotion that more likely get in your way. Fear is not of God so without fear you are free to move about and function in this life. Cannot say I am afraid of anything. Just a concern from time to time to meet head on and to be dealt with. Whenever I have hear can't, my automatic response has been why not? Life is meant to be lived and I agree to bury the negative and rid it from our lives. More positivity could do wonders in their weary world!
Decide that you will not longer be saddle with worry and live with fear. Neither one has any room to share in your life. Step forward and take your place in this life!!
1 person likes this
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
26 Jan 07
Excellent comments and perspective. Almost all positive mental attitude teachers / authors have their positive mental attitude founded in faith in God. And, God is not the author of fear, worry and confusion. Jesus reminds us that we cannot add one inch to our height nor one second to our lifespan by worrying.
Like the song, One Day At A Time, we get more mileage out of life when we stay focused upon accomplishing things than worry about them.
@emeraldisle (13139)
• United States
26 Jan 07
There aren't any benefits for the most part. Yes some fear is good otherwise we might run out in traffic for example but fear in the sense of afraid of just what might happen isn't always a good thing either. Now that being said it is often easier said then done not to worry or fear about what might happen. We worry about our kids, our futures, whether we'll have enough money to pay the bills etc. As long as we don't let it become an obsession I don't think it's something to be concerned about.
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
26 Jan 07
Good points, but may I make a suggestion? The human mind can only think about one thing at a time .. so, to displace worry, we focus on the positive, the lovely, the possibilities, the beautiful, the faith perspective, etc. We can .. we CAN .. control our thoughts .. it takes work. We have to overcome one habit by learning a new habit to displace it .. and, our thought life is habitual ... so, change the habit of worry with the habit of focusing upon the good and the possibilities.
@creationhub (3066)
• Malaysia
26 Jan 07
You have a great post here. I hate fear and worry. No doubt it seems to be so much part of our life but we can actually detach them.
True that both fear and worry is a kind of human instinct to protect oneself. However, the adverse effects are very much worst. I know of friends who worry so much that they actually become ineffective in doing other things. They are so bound by worrying that nothing seems to get done.
To me, worry is a disease which eats up our dreams or ambitions to excel. The bold and the brave have neither fear nor worry as extra baggages in their walk to success.
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
26 Jan 07
When I am in front of a large group of people officiating a wedding, no one knows how much the human tendency tries to arise in my mind and tries to bring in fear. But, I've learned to control that. And, therefore, people think I am an extremely confident person .. in fact, I can be called arrogant, just because acting confident about the "what ifs" of life seems arrogant to the ordinary person, for some reason.
Worry and fear PARALYZE us .. but, we can overcome this by changing our perspective.
1 person likes this
@sylvrrain (659)
• United States
26 Jan 07
I have very few fears and worries in my life. I guess I can say I am one of the lucky ones.
There are only a few things that I fear or worry about, and they have been fears and worries for a long time. I fear for my children and I worry that something will happen to them that will cause them harm. I know that I should not worry too much about it, but that is easier said than done.
Now that they are grown and live away from home, I worry even more. I do not lose sleep or waste energy worrying, but I do think about it often. When I begin to worry too much, I make a phone call to check up on them. When I speak to them and they tell me they are fine and everything is going good, I feel my worries are unfounded, but that does not stop me from worrying later on.
As for other aspects of my life, where most people would be concerned, such as finance, career, health, etc., I feel that live throws all kinds of curve balls, and with a little faith and patience, things always work out for the best. Without these "curve balls" we would not know how lucky and blessed we are.
@danjenkins (646)
• United States
26 Jan 07
Make a list of all the things you worry about for your children. Then, count up how many of those things have happened, and how many have not happened .. did it do any good to worry about the things that did not happen? Did it do any HARM to worry about them? Well, if you think about the unnecessary stress, and the other things you COULD HAVE been doing while worrying, there are reasons to try to find ways to not worry unnecessarily.
When you are tempted to worry, think of good things happen for your children. Remember all the happy times and believe for good in the future .. pray and ask God to take care of the things you cannot prevent, and trust Him.
