My husband and i decided not to have baby immediately after marriage.

You can't blame the people around you, they always look forward to some big event. Like when you were boyfriend and girlfriend they ask you when would be the wedding. Now that you are married, they anticipate your first born. When you have your first kid, they would then ask when would you have a boy or a girl. So never mind them, if age is still your advantage then i guess you have all the right to wait until both of you are ready. Just make sure you both tone down your other commitments so that your family commitment can squeeze through your already hectic schedules.

I think people always expect married couples to get pregnant right away, because in the years before, a few months after marriage, the woman was always pregnant, regardless of the financial situation, it's just what they did. You'll just have to keep reminding them that you have other things to think about right now. That you want to make the best life possible for your family before you bring a child into the world.

I think that it's a couple's choice and NO ONE ELSE'S! If you want to wait that's wonderful for you. I know that my fiance and I want to start a family right away. But that's just us. It's your choice. No one else's.

That's the very good decision you both have taken right now. I am not married person yet, however I have seen many couples around me facing such problems. Let me tell you one things, certainly having kids is the most desired and loving thing for any married couple. But before getting kid, they have to think lot of other things too. Like financial matters as you have mentioned out here. If you cant able to manage to feed up your kid in good and healthy manner, there is not point of getting baby at this time. Any married couple, who wants to have kid, first need to thhink one thing very carefully that, they really wants to have kid at that particular time. Whether they will be able to take care of their baby. Not only on financial matters but emotionally, physically and everything at all. I would suggest you to spend some time together in your marraige life. Understand each other more. Wait for the right finanical time. To grow an infant is very difficult task, important as well. Cerainly you need to have financial freedom to feed the baby in more hygenic way. Second most important thing is you both must be ready to take the resposibility of new born baby. If only one of you is ready to have baby, I would positively suggest you not to have kid at this time. Both persons' willingness must require for the birth of new baby. Again, I am happy that you both have taken such a good decision right now. I am sure very soon your things will be changed and you will have good finanical freedom to welcome your new born baby. All the very best.

I thought so that you and your husband are wise in making such decision. Having babies and raising them is such a big decision and i solute you for not just doing things that people wants you to do just to please them. It's a good thing that both of you thought of it before jumping into something that you don't feel you are ready to do. I think every couple has their own right in deciding their own way of live as well as when to have the babies.

Don't worry what other people have to say, they're not the ones who have to go through pregnancy and have to take care of that child. It's your right and I'm glad that you're being a responsible couple, too many parents now who can't afford their bills alone, a child is a serious thing.

Well its none of their business! I got married and had a child right away, so I can't say anything bad about that path BUT we made the decision for a child that quickly. We could have easily had decided to wait. My point is that YOU are in control of your lives. If you want a child NOW then have one if you choose to wait then again thats your choice and more power to you! I know its hard but you should just ignore them. I'm sure they will find other things to do with their time. :)

I think it's all up to what you decide. Me and my husband sort of went backwards. we got pregnent while we were trying to decide when and where to be married, so we just had a small little wedding with a rev and two whitnesses. both our parents live far away so it was no big deal for me. i think if you both want to wait it should just not be any ones business except your own. who cares what everyone else thinks! it is afterall your life not theirs.

As a mother I can tell you there have been many times in my life that I wished I had waited I had my children right out of high school and had to wait until I was 35 to go back to college now my children are almost grown and gone and my life is just beginning instead of having a career I'm starting from scratch at 40. So tell those people who are pushing you to butt out it is your life and no one has the right to tell you how to live it. Enjoy your husband and your time as a couple children will come later and you will have no regrets.

Don't let other people influence you in your decision. Whether to have a baby or not, and when to have a baby, is up to you and your husband. It's your life, not theirs.

My parents waited 7 years to have my older brother. It pissed of my grandma, but I think it was a good choice because they were in a better place to have kids and probably did a better job of parenting because of it. Don't listen to the people giving you crap because you need to experience each other also.

we thought of that same thing too. though we were in a realtionship of 9 years before we got married. we still think we lack time of just being together. wiht out anylimits. so i guess now that we are turning 3 years married. we can now plan for a baby.

I commend you on your decision. My husband and I also made that decision and I thank God we did. We have had time to really get used to each other as husband and wife, and to discover a few issues that need to be resolved before we start bringing children into our lives. My brother and his wife actually married because of their daughter, who is beautiful by the way. :) But they are having a lot of problems now that have to be hidden from her. And she adds more stress on the problems, even though I know that neither of them regret having her. Hang in there and don't ever regret your decision to wait.

Children are big responsiblities. Some folks aren't parentying type, and having children are not a mandatory thing to have. If you and your husband are not ready to have children, wait. If you have other things you want to acomplish, do it. Achieve your goals, if the time is right and you both are willing and ready then have children. But don't listen to others when they make a big deal about it, there is really no rush. And if it does get too late there is always adoption.

Just don't mind them. As long as you know your priorities and responsibilities in life, then nothing to worry. Just don't get affected at all..

bad decision is you want my opinion i guess to enjoy kids at beging is much better and who knows if you can after some years of marriage

I really wish people would mind their own business. I don't understand why they always think they have to comment on your choices about having children. It happens no matter what. After I had my daughter people started asking me immediately when I would have another baby, and when I told them I didn't want one they said I'd change my mind when she got older. She is seven now and I just had my tubes tied but they still keep saying I will change my mind! Some people are so nosy.

Like you, my husband and i decided to wait for one year before trying to get pregnant. We did this to enjoy each other more and we wanted to be ready financially and emotionally. And we didn't have any regrets! Right now, we have our four-month-old baby daughter. We got pregnant with her one year and three months after getting married.

If people are asking why you won't have a kid right away, just tell them that you want to be finanically stable before you have a kid. If you're talking about money, then I figure that's the reason. If it's not, then just tell them the truth. If they judge you, just tell them that that's how you feel, and you don't want to bring a child into this world when you don't see yourself ready yet.

I think you are wise to wait for a year or two. I do warn you (although I don't know how long you've been married), women often hit this stage of MUST HAVE BABY NOW after getting married, no matter how they felt beforehand... you've been warned! lol Anyway, my husband and I waited a couple of years because he didn't feel ready. I think that was very wise on his part. It's really really important that you have JUST husband and wife time and don't introduce a new little person into that mix right away. Often the wife will get so engrossed in this new wonderful person that's so dependant on them (and has never hurt their feelings like hubby has) that the husband will feel pushed away. In a very new marriage this can be devastating. The above reaction can happen even with well established marriages, but if you have a couple years under your belt of having devoted yourself to your hubby, it's not so critical. As many other posters have stated, it's also so important to be ready financially as well. Other than the Dr. bills, I really didn't find that having a new baby was too ridiculously expensive, but I also didn't fall for the "everything must be new for my prince(ss)". As you may know though, financial problems are the number one cause for divorce, so try and save and be completely ready. Babies bring a lot of joy and a lot of stress. I now have two beautiful babies, and I wouldn't trade them for the world! One last thing... make sure you both agree on discipline and that sort of thing (also whether you're going to pick the baby up every time it cries etc) because those sorts of things can be VERY stressful, especially in the heat of the moment. I say congrats on a wise decision! God Bless!