cheating

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ok tell me what you think. my girlfriend dug through my instant messagenger today and seen that a girl has been chatting with me. i wasnt talking about hooking up with her or telling hr she loks good none of that i just responded to her. she knows i have a girlfreind and told me she has me hooked!(my grlfriend).now i didnt try to hide it.she says im cheating.now she has her own life she goes to lunch at work talks to people all day sends emails to people so happy with her day and comes home everyday and digs in my computer lookin for something.why i dont know i never cheated not o toot my own horn but im a good guy,until today the first day i say hi to someone she goes crazy and says im cheating.now i ask hr about her day she says i orked all day but if i call her at work she says im ding nothin its boring!or im going to talk to my friends in the copy room. but when she comes home its like i not there no convo for me she meets some guy at the bank a week ago and he give her a new credit card i asked her about it she got mad. if i say i know you dd more at work cause you are talkative your not just gonna sit at your dsk all day and not talk to people she gets mad. im not the god send for woman but i try. it told her i get know real love from her she said nothing.now what i wnna know is am i cheating cause i spoketo a girl freindly or is she looking for a reason to break up or make what shedoes that i have n clue about ok?i just want another opinion cause she feel that going through my phone,answering machine, my computer,which i can not do in return is the way its supose to be.