How can u tell if your teenager is being Bullied? Advice Please
By Macthedj
@Macthedj (630)
February 9, 2007 11:15am CST
My son is 14 and generally an outgoing kid. He loves his football and has become an avid little fisherman, but the problem seems to have come of late. He spends more time in his room than with myself and his mother and would rather go on MSN than have a discussion with me or his mum. I continually ask him if there is anything wrong but he says there is not and I always reassure him that he can come to me with anything he wants, I think he knows this but I am continually concerned when I hear him talk about people and how they treat him, he thinks it is normal and there is no harm in it but I get frustrated that kids can be so nasty to each other. I never remember being like that and wonder if he is really hiding the severity of what may be going wrong. Do you have any advice for a worried dad.
1 person likes this
2 responses
@stirringthepot (49)
• United States
9 Feb 07
It sounds like you have a close family, and if you are always available for talking he will when he find you when he needs to. I remember those years being tough going to High School, new friends, different pressures, and learning to be an individual. We form our personality by the responses we get from our peers. An example would be a new hair style if enough people laugh we don't do it again. Unfortunately kids can be rather harsh.
I saw an episode on Discovery about a year ago that described that at this age the brain is undergoing a physical change, it is learning new ways to store and access memories and emotions. As it forms these new pathways some info gets redirected to the wrong place creating an abnormal response to the input. Like telling a child to eat the ice cream at the table and not the couch, this would normally be fine for the child but now the brain is receiving info differently the message gets a response of frustration. They know that eating at the table is normal and no big deal but feel confused and don't like that feeling.
Being available and always watching is about the best I can think of. Maybe a martial arts class that you can do together might help, he would build self confidence and you would be bonding outside of the family environment. It might start new conversation topics.
@cloud_kicker_32 (4635)
• United States
18 Mar 07
ohh sweety..please dont fret..this is absolutely perfectly normal..for boys and girls..14 is pretty much that magic age of fidnign themselves,,and wanting to be less with there parents and more with friends and have the need desire of privacy,,heck he might be having girl trouble for all you know..just let him be.,.and just every once awhile remind him you are theer to listen and that YOu wont Judge,,if he needs you..but honestly..it wil be ok..:)
