What are your feelings?

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Hello Everyone, There once was a story about a little girl who asked her mother: "Why does Grandma eat out of the wooden bowl and the rest of us eat out of our beautiful dishes? Her mother surprised at the daughter's question, explained to her daughter that Mama's hands are shaky and she might drop our good dishes and break them, so she uses the wooden bowl instead." After thinking about this for a moment, the little girl asked: "The would you save the wooden bowl for me so I will have it for you when I grow up? The preview of coming events might have startled the mother even shaken her a little. But upon reflection, it may also have reassured her that her little girl was planning on taking care of her! The prospect for many of the elderly may not be so bright. They have become the fastest growing segment of the population in many parts of the world and many are 60 or older. A study showed that many elderly in nursing homes are frequently showed disrespect by those caring for them in these home, talk baby talk to them. That robs the older people of their dignity but is also bad for their well being and self esteem. This type of disrespect robs the elderly of their health also, they soon get depressed and decay physically and mentally. Many elderly in today's modern society find themselves homeless and alone, unvisited and uncared for. Especially in many nursing homes throughout the world, abuse, neglect and uncared for elderly are stored in nursing homes like sardines. When they enter these nursing homes most get the feeling it is their last stop on life's journey. How sad, yet when thinking of these dear elderly, they are someones , mother, father, sister or brother. On the other side of the issue sometimes due to needing nursing care twenty four hours a day, a nursing home is needed. But there is a difference when a nursing home is needed an when a nursing home is the easiest way out for those involved. Here is a case and point. I recently visited a nursing home where everyone around this lady I was visiting, was out of it. Sitting in wheelchairs, some strapped in so as not to fall, with each of them looking into space and with blank look on their faces. I went over to her and touched her hand gently,and asked her how she was doing? She looked up at me and with such a big smile and her face came alive and said; "I am fine thank you, how are you? She then proceeded to tell me to sit and visit a while, so I did. We talked about her grandchildren and how they hadn't been to see her in weeks, and that she hoped they were okay. She then went on to tell me that she really did not like it there. I asked her why and she said because there is nothing to do and I have no one to talk to and I get depressed. I feel like I am sitting waiting to die. I tried to comfort her and told her I would be back to see her again in two days. Here is my point, yes, in some cases nursing homes are needed when care can not be managed at home. But that is only needed sometimes. That being said, I personally feel that nursing homes are not where our loved elderly parent and relative should be. When they are older they need care, but especially if they have their full thinking abilities. Then in that case they belong home with their families. It is cruel to place someone who has a good mind into a nursing home where the just decay. If I need to ever place my loved one in any nursing home it would be the last resort, and I personally would visit to see if it is clean, well maintained, not smelling of urine and feces, and that the staff is qualified and certified personnel, a homelike atmosphere, activities and adequate meals. I would monitor my relatives care and visit them daily or if I could not at least 3,4 times a week. In the conclusion of this issue, I want to say, I personally would keep my parents in my home with me and care for them. If a nursing home is needed, some families may choose that. I personally would not, but I would never look down on those who feel they need to place their elderly loved on in a nursing home. I do not know their situation. I do though know this, for the amount of money a descent nursing home would cost each month, a nurse can stay with your relative when you can't and it would be cheaper and most important, it will make your elderly relative more happy and feel loved. What is your personal feeling on the issue of nursing homes? Take care, Jadona2006