My mother tries to control my life
By lynn3024
@lynn3024 (198)
Canada
February 18, 2007 4:37pm CST
I am 24 with two kids and when i was younger i always thought that my mothers constant need for control would seize but i have come to realize that it will not. She tried to get me to quit my job and go on welfare and when i refused she got really mad. She hated my husband and called him every name she could think of she even told me that she hated me because i was with him. She stopped talking to me for a few months but eventually got over it. Now things are alot better but still not great. me and my husband now live 40 miles away and she still tries to control what i do. she calls all the time and if she doesn't agree with they way i do things she fights with me. She doesn't honor our rules when she watches the kids she just lets them do what they want. this morning she called to ask what time we were coming into town. i said I don't know probably soon. she said well why don't you stop in. And i told her i didn't really want to because the baby wasn't feeling good. she tried to put the guilt trip on me by saying that dad wanted to see the kids because he never say them in awhile. i didn't say that i was going to stop in i just said goodbye and hung up the phone. 2 minuetes later she called back and said "bring dad a coffee when you come" now this is her way of manipulating people into doing what she wants. What can i do to get her to realize I can't do everything she wants me to do anymore.
1 person likes this
1 response
@AskAlly (3625)
• Canada
1 Mar 07
I kinda hate to tell you this, but once you have a mother you always have one. I raised my 5 children and my mother thinks I could not have done it without here. I am in my 40's and I swear she thinks I am still 16 and dense.
You just have to state the facts as they are. When she asked you when you were comming into town, you did not give her a decisive answer. You should say yes or no not maybe. "No, the baby is not feeling well today, I'll bring the kids around when they're feeling better." Don't leave her with the impression that she has to make up your mind for you.
You are lucky she is 40 miles away. Living on the same ranch my mother was 40 yards away. I finally had to tell her she was giving me a nervous breakdown.
Parents mean well but now the shoe is on the other foot and you need to learn to set the parameters instead of them.
