Do you think Marriage is a necessary?

Hi, For me, marriage is not necessary. Two persons (gays or hetero) can live happily together even if their are not married. In the world of today. It's doesn't matter. We should be grateful for that right. Because in the time of our grandfathers and grandmothers, two persons had to be married to live together. It's not the case anymore. Marriage cost money, so don't get involve in it. I will only get married if and only if I meet a really rich man, like Anna Nicole Smith. If that never happen to me, then, I will never get married. That's what I believe in. No institutions. Just naked love.

I think that is a very personal thing. Some people might be perfectly happy never to have the piece of paper, but to others that piece of paper is very important. I know it was for me, now however I doubt the wisdom of it. I am not a religious person so the vows before god are not important, but rather vows to my partner and then on with the party, the legalities are unimportant.

If you think a marriage is no big deal and a divorce is probable then I agree with you, don't get married. At the same time it would be better not to have children and much better not to own a house because they really create problems and put food in lawyer's mouths. And all the personal effects in a home - too much hassle, too much baggage. Yep, best to live in a hotel and change partners every now and again while you are attractive.

I have to agree with you. I'm quite an anti-marriage person. All I see it as is a piece of paper. A wedding symbolizes before god, the law and your family that you two are together. Being wicca.. the churches view of my relationship really doesn't matter to me. In canada your common-law if you live with someone for 6 months (I believe) so legally we are classified as a couple. And all our friends and family are already aware of the fact that we are together. So why should we waste the money?

I have read this discussion from end to end... and I feel compelled to comment a second time, about a "trend" I've noticed here. Well, not just HERE, but in the world that surrounds me, as well. It strikes me that a LOT of people who are strong proponents of marriage, make statements about marriage "offering security" and "sealing the deal," and that if you have a legal marriage it gives you "rights" and you can "get what you deserve" from your partner, if the relationship fails. Maybe I am out in left field on this... but what the heck are people doing, getting into relationships with ANYone if their underlying motivations (and this is just what it LOOKS like, from where I am sitting) include these thoughts of "trapping and exploiting" another person???? Doesn't that sound like "If I'm putting something in, I'm gonna get something out!" in not so many words? Is that really LOVE? It certainly doesn't sound like UNCONDITIOAL love. From over here, that looks a lot more like a mixture of insecurity and selfishness. Let the flames begin.... :-D

I suppose the answer is a matter of personal preference. For me, love and commitment don't require a "legal contract" to be validated. Marriage is perhaps more important and practical if you're planning to have children, but for two adults getting together after child bearing age it seems even less important. My mom and stepdad have been "happily unmarried" for over 30 years. I haven't been married since 1995, but that doesn't mean I haven't had committed relationships. In a sense, when I commit to you withOUT the marriage certificate, it feels like I'm choosing to renew that commitment EVERY DAY I come home to you. There's no piece of paper saying I "have to, or else."

I don't see why it is so necessary. I have been with my man for 7yrs and we are not married. I don't need a peice of paper to show how much I love him. If we never get married it would not bother me. Back in the day people didn't need all the legal stuff to get married. It was a vowel they took with each other. I guess everbody to their own, I just don't see the big deal. I am the only one of my siblings that are not married and me and my man get along better than the rest of them. So marriage doesn't make the relationship.

I have always found that people that get married always seem to let themselfs go after they are married for awhile. The reason I figure fo this is because they figure since they have the person locked into marriage then theres no need in trying anymore to impress them. I think if couples really want their relationships to work then they should just stay not married and I figure everything will work out nice.

My parents were almost not married. They have always maintained that a union doesn't have to be sanctioned by the state in order to be blessed by God. However, when you looked at the many gay couples who are struggling to get a marriage liscense so they can have the legal protections that marraige offers, I would have to say that marraige is the best bet. If not, when you die, everything you own will have to go through probate before your chosen life's partner can get it. You have to have everything legally documented, down to end of life decisions and where your 401K will go. I think not being married is more money for the lawyers than legal marraige.

I don't think it's necessary but I do realize some people feel it is. Those who are very religious want to make their relationship "legal" in the eyes of God. Personally I've been there, done that, and thanks but no thanks I'm never doing it again, lol. I'm going to be happy to live the rest of my life in sin with never having to go through the hassle of getting married again.

I had a beautiful, solemn wedding in one of the most beautiful churches here in Manila more than 2 years ago. It was attended by 300 guests. The "paper" that binds us is actually just a technicality.

Commitment is what it all boils down to. Here in Mexico you are considered "married" by law if you are 10 or more years living under the same roof together. My wife cannot divorce me if I don't mow the lawn or don't wash the car, hahahaha. We are not married, living together and feeling happier then most friends who went for all that you described above. No lawyers needed around us.

Yes I think marriage is necessary. Because through marriage we can increase our population. In other respect unless you married you could not understand the responsibility of a father or mother towards their child. I mean the maturity is not there unless you marry.

I think the marriage that we know of today, and the expectations associated with it, are twisted and tainted by the church. I have enormous faith. I love god, I feel a strong relationship with that energy. That doesn't mean I need to enter a church or sign a license to verify my love for a person. I've heard alot of "Marriage is a financial agreement, and Marriage is an agreement to raise children" I don't believe Marriage is necessary. The divorce rates in this country don't reflect an upset in our society's morals, rather the realization that we don't NEED marriage, and that remaining in a relationship with someone that makes you misearble is a ridiculous idea. I love love, True love, Enduring and unconditional love, but marriage and love are not one and the same. We are born alone, we die alone, and we are lucky to sometime in between meet someone who compliments and enlightens who we are. A friend, A lover, A partner. So many cling to the idea that we have to be married that they settle for strangers. I would rather live alone than marry someone who is not the love of my life. I would rather live in love with my partner than get married for any other reason than to have an enormous celebration to recognize who we are to each other. And I would get married, If I knew somehow that it would last.... Rather than living in the world of outside expectations, or the tiny voices in our heads that tell us for some reason once we recite those vows everything will be different. After the party is over its still just the two of you, and you still have to work at your love, work for each other-- The idea of settling into boredom drives me nuts, but accepting that I want to sit and say nothing next to him and read the paper or stare out the window, That makes me want to get married for some reason. Conflicting ideas. the old vs. the new, tradition vs. truth........ Church... BLah.

I agree. All that is needed for 2 people to be recognized by God as married is to say their vows before Him. Everything has to involve so many legalities these days and it is purely for money.

Marriage is an institution,really in a marriage there is so many things to be learned.One needs to adjust,one needs to do things right,one should have the adjusting capability.One should feel strong bond towards each other.

God honors government, He is the one who originally established it through His commandments. He recognizes the sanctity of marriage, that's why He created a male and a female to be in unison with His care and protection. Although it's just a paper, but this is under oath for both parties and authorized by your government. That's why there are people who designated to perform marriage rites (in presence of witnesses) not just whosoever. The paper you're referring is also for the benefit of the siblings you will born-- their legitimacy.

your question depends on the culture of your community. here in our country, marriage is very important especially when you two love birds want to live in a single home. marriage is a very big deal for us. nevertheless, marriage is now becoming an option here but it is vital for them (women) to have that piece of paper as sooon as they or will have a kids. as for me, it is important... hope it helps...

Up to you if you like have security feeling. It may not be true but at lest you will have mental satisfaction that it will stay for ever.

You are right,indeed.If you love someone and if it is luckily reciprocated also why need a paper to hold you togrther?But both of them must be very sincere to the relationship.Human mind is fickle so that's why we have bonds in place.