Does anyone have EXTREMELY NEGATIVE parents?

Canada
February 21, 2007 2:59pm CST
I'm not a child (far from it) but as I get older, I start to realize that my mom is SUCH a NEGATIVE person. Maybe when I was a kid I just didnt know better but as I grow and watch how my mom interacts with my children, I cant stop but help to wonder how she's made it this far with her negative attitude. Don't get me wrong - the woman is incredible - she will give you the shirt off her back and go cold or feed you and let herself go hungry, but it's the little things that I cant help but notice. For example, we'll be at a store, and some woman will walk by and she'll criticize her for no reason at all, or my kids will go over for a visit and while they're still taking off their shoes at the front door - she'll be picking on what they are wearing or their jackets are too small, or they need a haircut, etc. Now its become a joke with me and my girls - as soon as "grandma" says something negative - we'll just say but we LOVE YOU TOO Grandma! I don't know - I am hoping that this doesn't get worse with age? OR WILL IT? Anybody else have a very negative parent - how do you deal with it?
1 response
gigarange
@gigarange (1165)
• United States
21 Feb 07
There are really people that are generally negative. I say generally because they also have soft spot in their heart. My parents are great and I will always be grateful to them. I am responding this thread because I can relate to what you are feeling looking through my best friend's situation. I feel sorry for her for how her mother is. Her and her other siblings can never understand their mother. She can be the sweetest but she's probably 80% negative. In fact their family is never complete. The eldest left the house when she's young and after 5 years, she come home and tried to settle things and when that happened, another siblings left the house because of another mother-daughter problem. It's always the same situation, even neighbors feel sorry for them. It's always something. I heard most people as they become older tend to be more irritable and gets upset very easy. So imagine how a negative person would react as she/he gets older..but then not everyone is the same so it would probably depend on the person.
easywork
@easywork (14)
• Canada
22 Feb 07
that's exactly what I'm afraid of - she has a heart of gold but she is NEVER happy - she has a lot of wonderful things she could be happy about in her life - her children are grown up and married and have families of their own, my dad is terminally ill and he is the type of person that pushes people away because he doesnt want people to feel sorry for him - so at first we thought she was miserable because of the illness - but my father is totally the opposite of her - always looking for the bright side of things and she will always looked at the closed doors instead of the open ones so to speak. I feel like as a family, we spend most of our energy on trying to please her and see her happy but no matter what we do - it's just never enough - I am worried that as she gets older - this will only get worse and I dont want her to end up pushing everyone away and then end up alone you know. Thank goodness my father has an amazing sense of humour so he keeps things bright enough for all of us when she's like that. We used to blame it on menopause - but as we have flashbacks from our childhood, we realize it's just who she is and we cant change it! Thanks for your input. At least I know we're not alone!