can we be friends only???

I have a male bestfriend since college and our friendship remained until this day. We each have our respective spouse and children. My family know him very much and likewise, his family to me. When we're both still studying, people were always whisphering that we're into a relationship. Sometimes, we just have to laugh at some of the people's remarks and observations. Sometimes, both of us will talk about the special friendship we have and were amazed that we were never in love with each other.

I firmly believe that it is near on impossible for guys and girls to just be friends. Mainly because genetis are telling us to create human life together, therefore that thought will be forever in the mind of probably more of the males than the females. Its all genetics, it can not be helped

Yeah, I have friends who have gone through that. I don't see a reason why not.

Do you have any feeling on him? One way to find out that is by imagining he has got a girlfriend and he become in love with her. How do you feel about that? Are you jealous? If the answer is yes, why not give both of you a chance to be together? If the answer is no, then you may arrange opportunities for him to meet some girls from your friends. Maybe he would soon find a lover for himself. But then he may be too busy to accompany his girlfriend and spare no time to be with you at special moments.

my bestfriend is a guy.we've been bestfriends for 4 yrs now.people who just met us believe that we are really in a relationship.we are indeed in a relationship but we have different partners.he got a GF and i got a BF but that does not really affect the friendship that we got. its purely friendship that we got i dont feel anything romantic for him or vice versa.we are maintaining a brother and sister relationship.finding a friend in this world is not gender based anyway so definitely a guy and a gal could be friends.

I guess not. A guy wouldn't take the time to listen to your sob stories and go out of his way to help you out if he only has friendship in mind. I guess most guys aren't built that way. And if one guy's feelings are already involve (like your case), it will be harder to maintain the frienship. Because as long as you try to reach out to him, he'll continue to hope. It's better if you let go so that he'll have the time to make another connection. He'll make that effort to find someone else if he gets lonely.

well i think that it can happen, but for me ithas never happen. when ibecame friends with a male they also seem to catch some type of feelings and it is very sad becasue after that i had to break our friendship up because if i ever decied to get into a realtionship then that man would be jealous. but i do hope that you and him do remain friends. it takes to mature people to convert to that type ofrealtionship!

well, i cannot blame him. he might have found something interesting in you... also, it happends all the time. where one thought it's only friendship but one thinks the other way. i hope all is well with both of you and that your friendship will not be broken because of that.

Hey gender is not the case... ur understanding n attitude in relationship matters

for me there are instances where a male and a female are friends and nothing more on it. i have a male friends and we knew that it is a true friendship and nothing more. i guess in your situation is different, maybe he really does a special feeling for you, there nothing wrong with that. if u dont have feelings for him then tell him for sure if he is a friend, he will understand you.

I think it is indeed possible to be only friends but not lovers. One of my best friends is a gentleman, and I have lots of friends who hang out with boys only as friends. My mother has a lot of good friends who are men and my dad has lots of good friends who are women. There is nothing romantic about it. If you like each other and enjoy each other's company, there is no reason in the world why you can't be friends. In order for it to be a romantic relationship, I would think it would have to sort of evolve that way, and you'd know it if that's where it was going. Just my two cents.

i don't believe that male and female can only be friends especially if you are close with each other, i personally know this because i experienced the same experience that you are experiencing now, he was my best friend, i would tell him everything and anything i could think of, he would also tell me the same, it was pure friendship AT FIRST, i did believe that male and female could remain friends because of our relationship, but after a year, he confessed his love for me, and since he was my best friend, i gave him a chance and he became my boyfriend, it didn't feel different as when we were still friends, he acted the same and so was i.. only this time, we kiss and hug.. honestly, at first i really thnk nothing else of our relationship, but pure friendship even though he was already my lover, but eventually, i learned to really love him more than a friend, i figured, i must be already in love with him before, when we were still friends, but i didn't realize it.. now, we are still best friends and at the same time lovers... i love him truly and he loves me too... i think you should give him a chance because when the time comes, and you realize you love him and his already in love with someone else, and you knoe you can't turn back time.. i think you should really give him a chance, and if it doesn't work out, just tell him that, and i know he will understand since he is your friend.. but on my theory, it WILL work because you feel comfort with him and i'm sure he also feels comfort with you.. Good luck..

Yes, it is very possible. I have a relationship like that. First of all, a friendship is a everyday thing not a once a year thing.It is someone who you trust dearly and no matter what they will be behind you.It could be your husband or the guy you lived next to all your life and you consider him your brother.Usually, when someone says, can we be friends. It is a very polite way of saying no. If someone said I in love with you after ten years, they are lonely and in love with the ideia of being in love and they use someone they were attracted to ten years ago as an excuse.

I think you should try it out you have nothing to lose except your job

yeah it is a common belief and actually to some it is already a law that you cant be bestfriends with someone your oppposite gender, either you are in love with that person or there is something wrong with your sexuality. hehe i think this is partly true

i have heard people saying that they have been(boy and girl)best of buddies... so i cant say that a boy and a girl cant be friends..but most of the times(if the friendship is very intimate) what happens is that one of them starts falling for the other(rem i said most of the cases). it has happened in your case too! u said u used to discuss matters with him when anything made u upset...and he was there for you!in that case expections are bound to be there from the other side! if you are very sure that you dont have any special feeling for him...then i would suggest you let him go...he should get time to come out of this and prepare himself...else if you kept meeting him he would always carry that hope with him that one day you will look upon him...the way he looks at you! you also stated that you knew that before (that he loves you),,,you should have made it clear that time only! but 10 years is a long time i must say...he really loves you!cant you give him a chance? but remember dont be there with him jss because he loves you...unless and untill you dont feelk the same for him..dont go for it else it might escalate into something worse. if you are very sure ..you cant have that feelings for him..then stop here only...because it will be very difficult for him to be 'jss friends'!

Sure we can, i mean man and girl isnt always become a lover. too many people out there thing friends are the best way to have close with us and getting flirty. I believe that true friendship between man and women are really exist, but they often become love becouse theres common sense between two.

My best friend is a girl. There's never been anything like that between us. It is quite possible for male and female to be friends only.

If both of you are still single and he's so sincere,why not give him a chance?

As long as you continue to be honest with him, it isn't you problem it is his. You could tell him you are worried about the strain on him and suggest not being friends. I don't think he is going to let it come to that and hopefully he will realize how important this is to you. Caroline