I Met My GrandsonFor The Frist Time, An I Was Shocked!
By classy56
@classy56 (2880)
United States
February 27, 2007 5:29am CST
i had been waiting for about 3 weeks to meet a grandson.i didnt know i had.my son called an said he was bringing him to see me.so i fixed supper for everyone.wow! when i frist seen him i was shocked.he had the prettiest blond hair an green eyes, "but he was wearing girls pants an shirt an his shoes were awlfull looking .i didnt say anything to him about it.after supper we had a nice talk an he told me his birthday is in march an he would be 13 yrs old.an he told me about his family members. when it was about time them to leave.he ask me for my phone number.i was shocked again.but i took my son in another room.an told him that the boy needed some new clothes an shoes."my son told me that my grandson told him that he didnt have very much of anything.what the mother did with the child support money he dont know.but we can tell that the boy wasnt getting it. my grand son didnt hug me by. but did said he would call me.wish i was happy about. i am just worry about the boy mental state of mind after seeing how poor he looked an everything.i want to help him to get a better life than what he has.but im not sure how to do it.what do you think about haveing a birthday party for him? an let him get to know his other family members.an plus this would be a great way for him to get things that he needs.or do you think this is to much to soon? me an my son can afford to by him new things.{just to let you know}what do you think.party or not.
2 people like this
9 responses
@danishcanadian (28953)
• Canada
28 Feb 07
You are a wonderful grandparent to be so concened!! I know I was a lucky child that my parents never had any problems providing for me, though they were divorced, and that the child support money went to the CHIDREN!!
I suggest that if you are going to give him what he needs, you get the things FOR him, and don't give him money. OK give HIM a few dollars that he keeps for himself to spend or save as he sees fit, but if you are going to get him things for his life, that he needs, get the things FOR him. This way there will be a guarentee that his mother won't get her hands on the money and squander it as she has done with the child support.
1 person likes this
@classy56 (2880)
• United States
11 Mar 07
o thank you.i try to be a good grandma.an i do want to help him.thanks for the advice an you are so right.the way he talked about his family,it wasnt very good.he will be here again next weekend so i will go get him what i think he will need for the summer.i already bought him a bunch of winter stuff.thank you
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
27 Feb 07
I think if it was me, I would wait and see if this kid does call you. He may think you are trying to buy his love or that you feel you owe it to him and that might make him back off.
1 person likes this
@weemam (13372)
•
28 Feb 07
I think it would be a great idea , but can I suggest you don't all go buy him clothes , at 13 he will know what he wants even if he doesn't have it , you could all give him money or vouchers and say what I do to my grandchildren £" I have no idea what a young person of your age would like so please choose something for yourself" I think he would love it , but keep it simple xx good luck and congrats on your new grandson xx
@whiteheather39 (24403)
• United States
27 Feb 07
You said he told you about family members, if he could do that then he must know them already. If he does give you a call then you could ask him if he would like a birthday party or a shopping trip.
1 person likes this
@classy56 (2880)
• United States
27 Feb 07
thats a good ideal also,yes,he was telling me about his mom an stepdad an one of his aunts.he dont know any of my sons family yet.thats why i was wondering about a party.so maybe he could get to know them.i sure hope he calls.but his mother always takes him an run.but now since i gave him my phone number he can call anytime.
@shambuca (2524)
• United States
27 Feb 07
I think a party is a great idea - just don't overdue it- it might be too overwhelming for him. we had a similar situation in my family- you need to just take it slow- he will warm up to you- if you can try to spend a day alone with him before the party -getting to know him- just talking and showing him pictures- take him to lunch, buy him something small- and just say this is what grandmas do!
1 person likes this
@dfinster (3528)
• United States
27 Feb 07
I would ask your son how he feels your grandson would react to this party. By the way, I think it's great that you found out you had a grandson. What a wonderful thing to find out. Anyway, if your son thinks the boy would be receptive to a party I think it would be a really nice thing to do for him. If you think the child support isn't going towards the child and can afford tobuy him things he needs, I'd go ahead and buy them for him. I don't think I'd send everything you buy home to his mom's house though. Maybe you could keep some of the things at dad's house to make sure he keeps them. But things like shoes and jackets that he'd have to use everyday could go along with him so he'd have them to use everyday.
If you have the party for him I think it would be great for him to meet his other family members. I think that the more loving and supportive people a child has around them the better off they are. Good luck!
@classy56 (2880)
• United States
27 Feb 07
thank you,i was great to find him.i already have 5 grandkids now i have one more.it also help haveing my 2 oldest grandsons with him the other night.they were hanging around him alot so i think that helped him to feel comfortable.i would keep some of the things here with me.but the boy looks awfull long stringy hair but it was pretty.an i dont wont him going to school getting teased about his clothes.yes i think a party would be a great way for him to meet his other family.but i dont want to scare him.thanks you just reminded me he didnt have a coat on when he was here.O my.an its cold here..
@sharon613 (2321)
• United States
28 Feb 07
I'm sorry to hear your past woes. I'm glad that you have finally gotten to meet your grandson. I think throwing him a Birthday Party is a terrific idea and you should move foward with your plans together with your son. Good Luck in whatever you and your son decide to do.
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
28 Feb 07
I think a party would be a lovely idea. He could meet everyone and maybe it would be the start to having a meaningful relationship.
Now for my snotty opionin.
If your son can afford to help get his son new clothes and nicer things than why hasn't he done it? He should take his son for a shopping trip and make sure he has the things he needs, shame on him for not living up to his son's needs.
Okay I got that out, I know I am more than likely overstepping my bounds and there is probly alot more to the story, this is just my reaction to what you wrote.
@CaroleeKaufold (1853)
• United States
11 Mar 07
Yes, take him in and love him ... a lot! Have the party, let him get things that he needs and will help him. He sounds like a diamond in the rough. Give him a place to go to be comfortable and happy. He needs to be treated special, something he may not have felt at home. Let us know how it goes.
