Who should pay for a date?
By ethanmama
@ethanmama (1745)
Philippines
February 27, 2007 11:56pm CST
In the past, it was pretty cut and dried. Guys ask gals for dates, and they pay for their dates. Nowadays, however, with the advent of women's lib, the rules are not so clear anymore. Sometimes gals ask the guys out for a date. So who should pay for the date in this case? Or should guys and gals just go dutch?
I'm kinda traditional, my husband (then boyfriend) used to be the one to ask me out on dates and he pays for it. But sometimes, I pay for it too.
Would love to hear your opinions!
1 person likes this
9 responses
@ethanmama (1745)
• Philippines
3 Mar 07
Yes, the traditional way is still for the guy to pay. Some guys get insulted when the girl doesn't let him pay.
@yanple (164)
• Philippines
28 Feb 07
in a traditional scenario, guy asks girl for a first date, the guy should foot the total bill. but in the succeeding dates, meaning, the girl also wants to go out often with the guy, they can go on turns, or dutch. it would be unfair for the guy to always shoulder everything.
but if a girl asks a guy out, which is already common now, i think that would depend on the girl. she could treat the guy out or go dutch. but it woudn't be right to expect the guy to foot the bill. after all, it was the girl who planned the "date".
@ethanmama (1745)
• Philippines
28 Feb 07
I agree. My stand is that whoever initiates the date should be the one who pays :). It's not fair if only one party pays.
@queenmika25 (14)
• United States
1 Mar 07
I believe that if it is a first date and the guys ask the girl out, then traditionally, he should pay. When I went out with my boyfriend for the first time he paid the total bill, transportation, everything...this went on for a few dates. After a while we were familiar with each other so sometimes we would take turns, go dutch and split the bill. I believe that if a guy asks a girl out, he should pay, but if a girl asks a guy out, she should have some money on her to pay, but some guys will still pay for the bill even though the girl asked them out. LADIES, always have have some money on you just in case he comes up short you can help with the tip. Hope this helps.
@chiquitita (1226)
• Indonesia
1 Mar 07
I agree the one who asks for a date should be the one who pays the bill. And yes it is not fair if only the guy/girl who pays all the time. A relationship needs give and take, if it is to be strengthen.
1 person likes this
@mrsrealo (21)
• Philippines
28 Feb 07
in me and my parter's case, since we're both earning now, HE pays for our dates especially it he's the one who invited.
but there are times when we just want to go out, eat out for no reason at all, we split the bill.
or we just go alternates on paying. so if he pays for tonight's dinner, i'll pay on our next dine out.
@ethanmama (1745)
• Philippines
28 Feb 07
That's nice of you. I always thought that it isn't fair if the guy pays ALL the time.
@ethanmama (1745)
• Philippines
3 Mar 07
I think everytime you ask somebody out, you are taking a risk, whether a real physical or an emotional risk. That's why I do not generally agree with going out with total strangers, unless it's a group date.
@hestee (250)
• Nigeria
28 Feb 07
Since they want equality fine with me. You want to pay when we go out on a date it's well with me.Though am traditional you can't afford to be too stiff. Sometimes the lady may be bringing in more cheese than the guy and you still want to play the hero? Go ahead and max out your crdit card i wish you well.
1 person likes this
@ethanmama (1745)
• Philippines
28 Feb 07
Thanks for your response. Sometimes the lady may have more money at the time. And it's perfectly all right if she insists on paying, both of you enjoyed the date anyhow. :)
@raijin (10345)
• Philippines
1 Mar 07
The times now are more different back then, alot has changed. I think that both should sometimes share or take turns when it comes to paying for dates, people now has many different needs and most individuals are also working hard not only for themselves but also for their own families. I think it is more of a give and take situation now, and that both parties should understand more one another..
1 person likes this
@nangkasuy (83)
• Philippines
1 Mar 07
A guy friend of mine once told me, that he likes it when during a date the girl offers to pay her share. Of course he wouldn't let her but it's the thought that counts.
When I was still a student I always expect the guys to pay for the date, I mean, they're the ones who asks me out. But when I started working, I make it a point that I pay for my share or if I was the one who asks then I pay for the date. I got really pissed when my date made me pay, when he was the one who asked me out. If I had know we were paying dutch I would have told him to go to mcdonalds or the like!
Anyways, when my hubby and I were still dating we would take turns or dutch.
@im_anna (717)
• Philippines
1 Mar 07
during the time of keannu's 1st break in movies, when guys courted, i expect them to pay for the date since they are the ones who asked. But when hubby (then boyfriend), were already "together" as a couple, we would take turns in shelling out for the dinner, or movies, or when the other had an extra/bonus. But if we'd go out of town, we'd go dutch
