Third Opinion - get that lawyer off my chair!

Just like in any profession, you have good ones and bad ones, and the bad ones get all the attention. That being said, here is my joke: A businessman was caught embezzling millions of dollars from his company. He went to his lawyer told him he really didn't want to go to jail. The lawyer replied, "Don't worry, you'll never go to jail with all that money". The lawyer was right, when he went to jail the man didn't have a dime!

I don't think all lawyers, or solicitors as they are known in Ireland, are gutless although like you say their fees are astronomical. For every one bad solicitor I have encountered, I would say that I have met three good ones. I don't think we should stop joking about them. We joke about everybody and everything, so why not solicitors. I enjoy the jokes.

Lawyers, overpaid bullies that think they can make people do what they want just because that person can't afford a lawyer themselves. The last one I tangled with I read up on the relevant law and threatened to take them to court, they backed down and gave it. Just bullies and bluffers. all the best urban

lol thats a good joke! no i dont think we should stop cause then people will say we should stop telling Yo Momma jokes, blond jokes (which i am a natural blond as is my husband and son and i still laugh at those jokes), ect.... then what will we have to laugh about. sometimes when i have a real bad day i will just go to jokes.com and give me some good laughs. a joke is just a joke. its not pointed directly at someone.

the funny thing is in america you all seem to have a bad opinion of your lawyers but where I come from, england, we respect our lawyers and do not think of them in this way.

The only lawyers I admire are prosecutors. Normally they are the ones receiving the least amount of pay. Most defense attorneys would represent a shark that just ate 3 little girls if the shark had enough money to pay them !! The justice system leaves little to be admired here in the United States anyway.

Lawyers are supposed to do justice to their clients. A lawyre may be fully aware that he is representing a criminal, but his duty is to protect the criminal with in the four walls of law! Similarly a lawyer may be fully aware of an innocent is being punished, but when he is put on the offensive he has to perform his duty. Similarly, the judge has to perform his duty with in the law of the land with out showing any personal affinity to the case. So let us not blame the lawyers as heartlessetc.!

I am not a great fan of lawyers however, I think many people doo them a disservice particularly in criminal trials. The Constitution provides that every citizen is entitled to a lawyer paid for or provided for by the court. The Lawyer, according to the Constitution, is bound to give the best defense possible regardless if he knows his client is guilty. A good defense case that exemplifies the lawyers doing their job is the O.J. Simpson murder case. All his lawyers did their job to defend their client whether we like it or not. In the end it was not the lawyers who got O.J. off scot free...it was the jury. The lawyers simple put doubts in the minds of the jury giving them a case of reasonable doubt which obligates them to acquit. My only complaint against lawyers I have, however, are those who are in it to get large settlements to increase their bank accounts, paying little heed to what repercussions may result. For example, malpractice suits against doctors......cases won with big settlements have skyrocketed doctors insurance which results in the doctors and hospitals raising their fees. There is nothing we the little people can do about it. Not all lawyers are shysters, thank goodness, but it seems that the good ones are few and far between these days.

No! We should continue to enjoy lawyer jokes! we should have more jokes about everyone and everything, until "PC" finally tucks tail and runs...runs away...far into the hills... yaya

The lawyers of today are very much different, so it seems, but definitely a lot of them stay heartless, and now they are extremely cunning. They are willing to lie in court and do everything, regardless the propriety, just to win their cases, at times, at the expense of the poor and innocent accused. Even if all evidences are presented to prove the guy's innocence, the lawyer find all sorts of loopholes just so he will be sentenced. He is out there because, he must prove how good he is. Very cunning lawyers can also have their guilty clients acquitted. They find all ways to include how the case was worded. Everything for money. But it cannot be denied that we need lawyers. I hope the honest good ones will multiply because, we need their advises and services on so many things which has something to do with the laws of the land.

I think my country has too many lawyers. But that's not the fault of lawyers, that's the fault or our society that thinks the answer to anyone's problems is to SUE someone else. Everyone is looking for the easy way out, and if they think they can make money by suing someone else - they WILL! Not one takes responsibility for their own actions anymore. out society is WAY too letigious and that's what bothers me. You can't blame the lawyers for being hired to do their jobs, no matter how smarmy a case may be.

Lawyers will take anything that isn't tied down. They are unscrupulous. A person that will try to keep a horrible criminal out of jail, is not to be respected. Thus, all bad press they get from jokes is warranted.

I think that joke was funny My boyfriend laughed too so thank u he told me to ask if u know any other jokes i have friends that are lawyers to and they have had to study hard to get where they are and work in a demanding stressful environment but i suppose the financial gain more than makes up for that there are some lawyers out there that are like that as we all know but we can't tar them all with the same brush and we are proof that they're not all bad atthe end of the day someones got to do it i think it ok to have a laugh but in a nice way.

Like Doctors they are bottomless. Now matter how much pay, it goes on and on.

the reality is that they have a job that defends clients whether innocent or not. the game plan is to win, not to lose a case..well that if they intend to.. if attorneys can only choose to have innocent clients then there would be no problem but people lie, clients lie..

There are still lots of lawyers worthy of the joke. They may be normal people initially, but the nature of the business is slime. They are not after truth and justice, they are after winning the case for their client, and they will use any twisted argument they can dream up to do so. Some jobs require that - consider car salesmen, insurance salesmen, or anything salesmen. Have a great day.

I agree with what others say, there are jokes about everything and everybody and there always will be. The dumb blonde jokes haven't stopped and the blondes are not offended by them. In the Toronto Star newspaper (and probably others around the continent) there is a comic strip called "A Lawyer, A Doctor & A Cop". The title speaks for itself. Constant jabs at lawyers, doctors, cops and the people they come in contact with (clients and criminals). Everyone needs a good laugh, no matter what form in comes in. If you don't like a certain type of humour, you don't have to listen to it. The best jokes are from those who can make fun of themselves. Josh Blue, winner of Last Comic Standing who has Cerebral Palsy is a perfect example of that. We should all learn to laugh at ourselves and try not to take life so seriously.

My experience of lawyers is that they are overpaid and use their skill to bully people. all the best urban

My friend has been living with her boyfriend for years and now has a child with him....He is the biggest jerk on the face of the earth- most of them are.

Rutheless but funny liked it a lot , who is dr.watson the one with sherlock homes ?... :)