Parenting adult children

United States
March 3, 2007 6:01am CST
Do you give unsolicited advice to your "grown- up" children or bite your tongue? What about when they ask for it? Are you honest, or do you let them figure things out for themselves?
1 person likes this
5 responses
mrbranan
@mrbranan (1012)
• United States
3 Mar 07
I know as an adult child I don't want my mom getting involved unless I ask her adive. I am lucky she doesn't. Now when I need it I do want her to be honest. I wouldn't have asked otherwise. So if they ask be honest.
1 person likes this
acinej
@acinej (16)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
I agree! My parents are really good at not giving their opinion unless we ask. They may say something if they think it is really important, but that doesn't happen very often. On the other hand, my MIL (whom I dearly love), is very opinionated at times. She's been trying to get me to potty-train my son since before he was 18 months. She wanted me to feed my kids food before they were old enough. Most of the advice related to the kids- part of it is just that she loves them and wants to do things for them. I can understand that. She's such a doting grandma :)
dlhnola
@dlhnola (70)
• United States
4 Mar 07
It's nice to hear from the other side.... sometime's it is hard to turn off the "mommY" even when your children are grown.
recycledgoth
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
3 Mar 07
I am very lucky that my son and I can talk about things openly and honestly. He will ask my advice and I will give my advice, it is his choice as to whether he follows that advice or not. I will always be therefore him to support him though.
dlhnola
@dlhnola (70)
• United States
4 Mar 07
thanks for responding. My daughter asks but doesn't always like what she hears.... BUT, if she THEN hears it from someone else, it is good advice....
recycledgoth
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
11 Mar 07
Thank you for the best response
kylanie
@kylanie (1205)
• United States
10 Mar 07
I have got 5 kids counting my step-kids 15,16,18,22,24 I am 39 so the oldest 1 never ask for advice just for money and tells me and his dad about what is going on and the 22 yr.old I try to tell her what I would do in certain cases the 18yr. old ask me and I would say it's up to you then tell her if she ask again but the youngest which is my own kids they never ask me anything.
aninspiration
@aninspiration (346)
• United States
14 Mar 07
MY DAUGHTER AND I TALK ABOUT ALOT OF THINGS BUT WHEN IT COMES TO HER MAKING DECISIONS ON THINGS i TRY TO GET HER TO UNDERSTAND THE PROS AND CONS of the situation and if I have went thru it I will tell her so and what I did and how it turned out good or bad and I will point her in a direction I feel she can get more info but I always end up telling her that in the long run its up to her and what she decides I still love her and she knows in her heart what is best for her