"Hey! I'm not your Uncle!!!"
By hora_fugit
@hora_fugit (5862)
India
March 5, 2007 4:46am CST
My Communication teacher told us that in countries like Us and Europeans, if we call a stranger (or our neighbour) 'Uncle', then they will get annoyed. We should use 'sir' instead.
In our country, we generally use the word 'uncle' to address someone we are not familiar with (suppose someone in street from whom I want to know time), or elders around us whom we can't call by name.
So, will you get annoyed if you are called 'uncle/aunt' by some stranger who needs your help or somethinglike this...?
2 people like this
3 responses
@sadgirl_1958 (1088)
• United States
5 Mar 07
Hi - well in the U.S. you would never address a total stranger as uncle. I have family in Bangladesh but live in U.S. - so I know what you are talking about. I personally like the politeness and besides it is easier to remember Uncle, Aunt, Sister, Brother, etc., than all the names of people. However, in the U.S. we would more often use "Sir" or "Maam" than to express a relationship that doesn't exist. It isn't that people in the U.S. would get annoyed - it is more that they would be confused by why you would be calling them an Aunt or Uncle when they are not related to you....
@hora_fugit (5862)
• India
6 Mar 07
Hmmm... a culture difference I think. So better to call them Sir/Ma'am but I think I would to ridicule them:)
Thanks for your response, for you are the one who could understand my meaning pretty well:)
1 person likes this
@emeraldisle (13139)
• United States
5 Mar 07
I think I'd be more confused by it then anything if some stranger called me Aunt. Yes each country and culture has their own customes. It can make it difficult for ones not familiar with anothers customes when they visit or move. That doesn't mean though they can't learn the customes. I know if I was going to go over to another country for any legnth of time I'd research the customes there so that way I wouldn't offend anyone. There are books and web sites were one can study another culture's customes and be able to at least get a basic idea so that you are not seen as rude or impertinent.
@hora_fugit (5862)
• India
6 Mar 07
Thanks for the response. Now I understand what works behind that cautiion:) Ok, if you come to India, would you call an elderly stranger Uncle/Aunt? Or will you feel strange? I think if I go to USA, I'll confuse many persons before I come to know my mistake. LOL
1 person likes this
@ladyluna (7004)
• United States
5 Mar 07
Hi Hora_fugit,
I'm not really sure why I (and many Americans) are like this, but I'm offended when a stranger addresses me in the familiar.
If someone addressed me as Uncle (I am female, so I doubt that it would happen) it is the same as a stranger calling me dear, or sweetie. I think that terms of endearment should be reserved for those who are really dear to us.
I know that it doesn't make alot of sense. And frankly, I don't generally offend easily, so it's surprising that this is bothersome to me, but it is. I know many people who feel the same about inappropriate familiarity.
Now to the latter part of your question ... would I get annoyed? No, but I would be offended. However, that would not prevent me from helping the person if they were in need, and if I got a good 'vibe' from them. I think that people should be willing to overlook cultural differences if they are harmless.
1 person likes this
@ladyluna (7004)
• United States
6 Mar 07
Hi Hora_fugit,
You're welcome!
And thank you! If you hadn't posted this question I would not have known that Aunt/Uncle was a common salutation in India, like Ma'm or Sir.
I've been thinking more about your question. And, although this is a bit long, I wanted to offer you a better explanation.
I think it has to do with the USA being a 'melting pot' nation. As our ancestors came to America from all around the globe, they knew that their own little piece of history could be easily lost if they didn't take small measures to protect its integrity. They knew that melting into this nation (embracing the new land and its developing culture) was vitally important. At the same time, they didn't want to lose the history of their own ancestors and homeland.
I believe they took great pride in their accomplishment at having successfully made their way to the new land (it could not have been easy). I think a casual reference to a stranger being Aunt or Uncle would seem like the stranger thought it was acceptable to enter the domain that they had newly carved out. Since, most Americans, both then and now, would open their homes to their relatives to help them make their own way here in the new world.
At the same time, I also think that a casual reference to being a blood-relative would potentially disgrace their family lineage. The stranger may not be a good person, and might thereby tarnish their ancestral name.
I hope this make sense?
1 person likes this
@hora_fugit (5862)
• India
6 Mar 07
thanks for that post. It made me thinking.... so maybe I'll reply you on this again sometime:)
1 person likes this
@hora_fugit (5862)
• India
6 Mar 07
I am not going to call you Aunt ever, who knows what will I get in response...?!!!:$ LOl
But why like sweetie or dear? They are way too personal, but not Uncle/Aunt! ....... reserved for dear ones.... that's true though sometimes people don't love their own uncles and aunts too;)
And Thanks for being so helpful, and for replying me too:)
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